


Obviously

by sweetkisses



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Reality, Confused Louis, Insecure Louis, Louis is kind of a fanboy, M/M, blind!louis, complete virgin, everyone is in one direction but louis, famous!harry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-14
Updated: 2014-01-11
Packaged: 2018-01-01 14:02:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 64,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1044801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetkisses/pseuds/sweetkisses
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis is blind and a fan of One Direction, aka Harry Styles, and when they meet Louis' life turns upside down.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Español available: [Obviamente](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5543729) by [Sandra_Almighty](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sandra_Almighty/pseuds/Sandra_Almighty)



> So this is my new fic and i dont know a lot about blindness so bare with me 
> 
> Enjoy! :)

"This is going to be great. Like this is the best birthday present I ever got. I mean how are you ever going to top this, Lottie? I don't think that it is possible I honestly don't think that you or anyone else could ever top this birthday present. If they do then it better be that they give me some better eyes, but you and me both know that is completely impossible. In the end thought this is and will always be my best birthday present, even though it's two months early, it will still be the best." Louis rambles on and on for the next twenty minutes.  
  
Lottie has just given her big brother Louis the best birthday present, according to Louis of course. You see there is this one boyband call One Direction and they're pretty damn good or at least one will hope so because they already went on two world tours and had four sold out Madison Square Garden shows.  
  
There are four boys in this band Liam, Niall, Zayn and Harry. Harry Styles who Louis might or might not (might) be deeply in love with. They were on X Factor a couple years ago and that's when Louis found his love for them. He thinks they are absolutely perfect.  
  
Louis has always wanted to meet them but he's broke and tickets to their concerts are expensive as shit and Louis has never heard them live. So Louis saved all his money from his job and got another one all in hopes that he would save up enough money. Last year when he graduated from school he gave up his all his savings so he could move to London and become a book editor.  
  
He loves reading and if he can read for a job then hell yeah he is going to do it. The only flaw in Louis' dream job is that you need to be able to read. Of course he can read it's just well...Louis Tomlinson is blind. So all the books Louis has to read are going to be needed to be made in braille. It's not going to be easy though or at least that's what Louis' dean told him when Louis said he wanted to be an editor but they gladly accepted him into their school with hopes that Louis fulfills his dream.  
  
Then yesterday, late October, when Louis got home from work his younger sister, Lottie, storms into his flat and surprises him with tickets to meet _and_ go to One Direction's 'Before their new tour' show. Louis might have screamed like a little girl but no one needs to know that.  
  
  
"Okay Louis I know that you are excited but you need to like shut up." Lottie says as she pulls into a parking spot and turns the car off.  
  
"Oh my god are we here?" Louis says as he starts fixing his hair even though he can't see it. Lottie gets out of the car and goes to the other side to help Louis out. "My cane?" Louis puts his hand out as Lottie hands it to him. He really hates calling it that. _Cane_. It makes him sound old and fragile and Louis does not like that. "How do Iook?" He picked out his favorite outfit: the softest pair on skinny jeans he owns, favorite blue shirt and of course his black sunglasses.

Ugh he has a love hate relationship with those. Louis hates to wear then because people say it makes him look like a dick but he would rather be called names them have people ask him why his eyes look like how they do.  
  
Louis can here the hundreds of girls yelling and talking before he even walks into the building where the concert is being held. Lottie and Louis find their seats, top section but Louis doesn't mind because he can't see them anyway.  
  
Maybe that's why music is such a big thing in Louis' life. If he can’t see all he can do is hear and touch and so you take what you get.  
  
The siblings are due to meet the boys after the concert so for now they sit and wait for it to start.  
  
*

"Thank you all! We love you!" Harry yells into the microphone and even though Louis knows he doesn't mean it he can't stop himself from whispering it back.  
  
Soon the yells of the girls die down and all Louis can here are the chatter of the girls as they fill out and a slight ringing. Louis and Lottie say seated until people clear out and Lottie is directing him down some stairs.  
  
"Passes." A deep bored voice says. Louis puts his hand only Lottie's shoulder. "Have fun." The guy says again but this time with happiness.  
  
"We just passes the guard, I showed him our backstage passes." Louis whispers to Louis. It's one of his favorite things how she will always whisper what has happened or will happen in his ear. It helps him fell a little _normal_. "We are in line now. About four girls ahead of us." Louis nods at her.  
  
The line moves slowly and Lottie tells Louis that they are the last ones and that Paul is standing guard of the door that must have the boys behind it if the screams are enough to go by. Louis folds up his cane and sticks it in his back pocket as he grips Lottie arm.  
  
"Why'd you put your cane away?" She asks him.  
  
"I want to be able to have as much time as possible and I my cane will slow me down." Louis states as he shuffles his feet in anticipation.  
  
"Go ahead in." A voice in front of Louis says and it's Paul's.  
  
"Thank you." Lottie and Louis say together. Louis hears the sound of the door opening and Lottie leads him in. He is immediately hit with the smell of boys, sweat and bad cologne.  
  
"Why the fuck would you spray that Liam? It fucking stinks." That's Zayn and he his standing diagonally left of Louis.  
  
"You know you like it." Liam jokes back. Diagonally right.  
  
"Lads how about you stop the banter and say hello to our last fans." Niall his voice is loud and bouncing off the walls and if Louis just became blind then he wouldn't be able to tell you where he is but Louis is Louis so, directly right.  
  
"Oh I didn't even see you two there." Liam is moving closer. "Harry will be right in he is just in the bathroom."  
  
"That great! So...um I'm Lottie and this is my big brother Louis."  
  
"I'm a huge fan to be honest and I really love you're mus-"  
  
"Ugh another pair of indoor sunglasses." He shouldn't be able to hear it because it was a small mumble from across the room but heightened senses.  
  
Louis releases Lottie's arm and turns his body to Harry.  
  
"Actually I'm blind." Louis says bluntly and turns back to his originally position. In all honestly Louis would love to see their faces right now. They are probably like the rest pity, sadness, annoyed, angry, sympathetic etc.  
  
"It's nice to meet you blind I'm Harry." He's now directly in front on Louis. The blind boy has never had anyone react like that and it makes Louis feel good. "Ouch."  
  
"Liam just smacked Harry in the back of the head." Lottie says and Louis nods with a smile.  
  
"It's nice to meet you too Harry." Louis sticks out his hand and a big soft rough hand is shaking Louis'. "Is that Harry's hand?" Louis asks.  
  
"All mine." Louis can hear the smile in Harry's voice.  
  
"Do you want to take a picture?" Niall asks his position moving, Louis really hates that, he just wants everyone to stand still around him.  
  
"No thank you. I won't be able to look at it but I would just like to say thank you. I mean for me it's hard to find something you like and I really like you guys. I listen to all your interviews and music all the time. Like you guys are fucking awesome." Louis doesn't say how he wants to see what they look like because then it leads to awkward touching.  
  
"It's great knowing that you enjoy us for our music and not just how we look." Zayn says. Louis laughs at him.  
  
"All I know is that Niall is blonde and has blue eyes, Zayn has black quiff hair, Liam has forever changing brown hair and Harry has curly brown hair and green eyes but that's all." There is a silence and Louis allows his other senses to work. He can hear many different types of breathing, one who is standing directly in front of him maybe a little to close than normal.  
  
"How about a recording?" Harry says. In front of him. Louis has never thought of that before. He's supposed to be the blind genius.  
  
"Yeah." Louis reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone he presses the one button it has. A beep noise goes off. "Open recording." Louis says.  
  
"Recording open. Please say start to begin and stop to end for the recording." The electronic girl says. Louis has names her Jenny. She's always there for Louis even though she is a phone but she can't see him and he can't see her so maybe that's why he likes her.  
  
"Okay so if you all could just say who you are and my name that would be fantastic." Louis says and holds his phone out. "Start." He says.  
  
"Hi Louis! This is One Direction!" Harry.  
  
"We would like to say that it was a pleasure meeting you!" Liam.  
  
"Hope you listen to this every day." Niall.  
  
"Thanks for being our fan." Zayn.  
  
"Love, Harry."  
  
"Zayn."

"Liam."  
  
"And Niall!"

"Don't forget about me!" Harry says again and Louis waits ten seconds to make sure the boys have stopped.  
  
"Stop." Louis speaks. "Thanks guys. It means a lot to me." They talk some more before Louis realizes they still have his phone. "Can I have my phone back?" Louis asks and puts his hand out.  
  
"Harry that means you." Zayn says. Slightly left. His phone is being placed into his hand and he shoves it in his pocket. Paul comes in and kicks Louis and Lottie out. As Louis walks out he remember something he wanted to say. "Also I have never seen the story of my life video but I know that's it's one hundred times better than what I heard about Miley's. You deserve the vevo record." And Lottie is leading him out and away from Harry and the rest of the boys.  
  
*  
If Louis could go back to yesterday he would so he could change his meet of the boys and get Harry to fall deeply in love with him but it would never happen. Louis can't be with anyone ever he's blind and too much of a hassle.  
  
Yesterday was awkward and uncomfortable. Louis listen to the recording today and he can hear their boredness and fakeness in their voices. That's Louis' heightened sense ruining everything but in reality he ruined everything when he went to the stupid (perfect) concert yesterday.  
  
Yeah it was amazing. Yeah it was perfect. Yeah he loved it but it's not the same as how everyone else gets to meet them. Louis wanted a hug and a kiss like all the non-blind people. He wanted to see them. That's the problem with Louis when normal people get into awkward situations they talk about their clothes or something about their appearance and Louis doesn't know what they're wearing, hell he doesn't even know what he is wearing sometimes.  
  
Louis is sitting his kitchen as he sips his tea and reads his new book when his phone goes off.  
  
"Incoming call from Harry." Jenny says and Louis thinks he miss heard her but she repeats it again and nope.  
  
"Answer call." Louis says and Jenny's voice is gone and there is breathing on the line. "Hello?" Louis asks, scared that some killer got his number.  
  
"Louis!?" It's Harry. Harry from One Direction. Harry who met him yesterday. Harry who has the super soft yet rough hands. Harry who Louis embarrassed himself in front of yesterday.  
  
"How did you get my number?" Louis asks slowly as he moves closer to his phone.  
  
"I put it in when you gave it to me for the recording." Oh. "Anyways are you busy today?" Wow that’s the only explanation he’s going to get? Whatever its Harry Styles.  
  
"No." Louis says and today he was just planning on reading all day, maybe finish his book.  
  
"Great! Do you want to hang out?" Louis is totally confused on what is happening.  
  
"Uh sure..?"  
  
"Great give me your address and I'll be there soon." Louis tells him his address and then they say goodbye and hang up. Louis sits there is shock completely confused on what just happened. Harry stole his number, while he was right in front of him because he couldn't see but the boys and Lottie could. Lottie could!  
  
"Call Lottie."

"Calling Lottie." Jenny replies. The ringing of the phone brings angry into Louis.  
  
"Hey Louis."

"You let Harry Styles steal my phone number?!" Louis yells into the phone. "You're supposed to be there so you protect me from anything bad!!"  
  
"What's so bad about Harry getting your number? You should've seen the way he was looking at you he really likes you." Lottie fights back and it's dirty and pisses Louis off more than necessary.  
  
"You know damn yell I won't ever be able to see how he looks at me." Louis spits back and hangs up. Fucking sister. "What is the time?"  
  
"The time is 11:24am." Jenny answers and Louis decides that he needs to get dressed for Harry.


	2. Chapter 2

Getting ready is a hassle for Louis. He first needs to make it to his room without hitting the wall and since he's barley lived in this flat. He stand up from the table and start moving towards his room he gets to a point where he thinks he’s right in front of the doorway. Walking forward Louis runs into the wall just outside his door. Thankfully be doesn't wear his glasses when he's alone because then he would have broken them.  
  
Louis rubs his nose with his left hand as he uses his right to guide himself along the wall and into his room. This is what Louis knows by heart, his bedroom. His bed is directly left of him, pushed against the wall so that if Louis somehow ends upside down, which he thinks will happen (it never does), he'll get out on the right side because he’ll hit the wall. It's not weird he's just paranoid about it okay!  
  
His dresser is directly right of him and next to the dresser is the doorway for his bathroom, no door of course. Louis doesn't like having doors so as soon as he moved in he had all the doors removed.  
  
Louis has a couple more items in his room but other than that it's plan. People say he should put pictures or poster on the wall and Louis doesn't think they understand that even if he did he wouldn't be able to see it and admire it like everyone else. One time he actually bought a poster and the person that sold it to him gave him lesbian porn instead of the little puppies like he asked and when he asked his mum to hang it up for him she gave him a whole speech on how it’s inappropriate for him living with his younger sisters to have it up. She finally figured out what happened and told the sales man off.    
  
Louis makes his way directly right and searches through his dresser carefully. The amount of times he closed his fingers in the draw isn't even funny. He feels around for the soft shirt that he wants. His fingers slip through all the different fabrics until he finds the one he was looking for. It's blue or at least that's what he was told. Louis doesn't know colors, he should but it’s been to long since he last saw them.  
  
He slips the shirt on and then does the same process for his pants. When he's fully dressed he know that his draws are a mess and it is only going to be harder for him whenever he looks for his pj's later. The doorbell is ringing and Louis makes his way slowly yet carefully to the front door. Why is Harry here so early? He isn't even ready yet! He still needs to brush his teeth and his hair!  
  
Louis fiddles with the door handle and when he opens it he can hear breathing on the other side. That's the weird thing about being blind it could be some killer standing there taking in his prey before murder.  
  
"Um..Hello?" Louis says as he rubs his left arm with insecurity. He can feels eyes roaming him and Louis really wants to close the door, his stupid eyes causing him not to know who it is.  
  
"Hi." Harry and he's a lot close than Louis thought. "Wow your eyes are gorgeous." What? Oh my god! Louis forgot to put his sunglasses on!  
  
He quickly puts his hands up to cover his eyes. No one needs to see them, the emptiness and sorrow they hold is disgusting. Harry doesn't need to see the dull blue orbs floating about and focusing on nothing. It's embarrassing. One thing Louis never wants people to see and now Harry Styles from One Direction saw them and he doesn't even know Louis' last name.  
  
"No." Louis clears his throat. Manners Lou. "Come in. Please close the door behind you." Louis turns and walks a couple steps away until he hears the door shut. He knows that Harry is looking around and taking in Louis' house and Louis' just wants to see it so he could make conversation.  
  
"So I was thinking maybe we could get some lunch?" Harry says. He walking around, his voice moving and Louis doesn't like that.  
  
"Please stop walking." Louis says and the sound of feet stopping and Louis feels like a dick. "I like to know where you are at all times so I can at least look in your direction." It's half true but the real reason is because he's afraid Harry's going to steal something, not that Harry needs it but it has happened before.  
  
"Sorry." Directly in front maybe a three fee difference. "You know you can put your hands down. I've already seen your eyes." Harry says and Louis can hear a small smile in his voice.  
  
"Yeah but I haven't so it's not really fair is it." He tried to sound as nice as possible but it still comes out as rude. "Sorry. Can you just hand me my sunglasses please, they're on the table right behind you." Louis says and he hears Harry moving and then those soft hands are on him moving his arms and pulling it away from his eyes. Louis keeps his eyes shut; Harry's already see them enough. Then his sunglasses on slowly and carefully being placed onto his face. It's weird and causes butterflies to erupt through Louis' stomach. His face heats up and he knows that Harry can see he's blush.  
  
"You look prettier without the sunglasses." Close. Harry is close so close that Louis can feel his breath hit his forehead. He's not used to this. It's weird and different, Louis hasn't been touched or kissed by anyone else and it doesn't appeal to Louis at all. Sex might sound like it’s fun and it feels good but Louis doesn't care for it. Yeah Harry is the 'sex god' who everyone, including Louis, loves but when it comes to sex he can do without it.  
  
The blind boy has always been single and now he's standing in front of popstar Harry Styles who he asked him on a date for god knows what and is way too far into his personal space.  
  
Louis steps back until him and Harry are five steps apart. This is where Louis likes to be blind because he doesn't have to see the look on Harry's face right now but the quiet sigh from Harry is enough to tell Louis it's not a good look.  
  
"Give me five minutes and I'll be ready." Louis says and moves his left hand out until it hit the wall and he uses it to find his was to his room. He goes into the bathroom and stands in the doorway. Directly in front of him, 4 steps, is the shower. He steps in and turns to the sink. Louis reaches his hand out to turn it on and he hits the toothpaste and knocks it into the sink. He signs and puts his hand in it and grabs it from the bottom of the bowl. He puts the paste into his other hand and uses the hand at the bottom of the bowl to find the handles. He _always_ struggles to find the sink handles because there are so many different kinds.  
  
After Louis brushes his teeth and hair he reorganizes his sink, even though he's going to mess up again. Making sure that it goes in the correct order from left to right, toothpaste, toothbrush, floss, brush, eye wash and soap. Yeah he has eye wash. Sometimes when Louis keeps his worthless eyes opened for too long he'll eyes will get itchy and dry. That's why Louis prefers his sunglasses so he can keep his eyes closed.  
  
"Uh Lou?" Oh my god! Louis forgot Harry was here! He left him while he spent fifteen minutes reorganizing his sink! Stupid.   
  
"I'm in here!" Louis calls out and he can hear the footsteps enter his room and stop at that end somewhere at the bathroom door. It's hard to tell if Harry's in his bathroom because his footsteps sound farther apart than Louis' but that's not really important.  
  
"Hey." Harry's about two steps in front of him, which means he's still in Louis' bedroom. "Where's your door?" Great.  
  
"I don't like to have them around because I run into them." Louis laughs and he hears a small deep chuckle leaves Harry's throat.  
  
"Yeah I run into then too sometimes."  
  
"Ahh that's where we are different because I have an excuse when I run into them." Louis taps his sunglasses. "But you don't." They laugh and Harry asks Louis if he is ready to go and soon Louis is locking his door when they leave.  
  
"Um Harry?" Louis twiddles his fingers. "Do you mind if I hold onto your arm?" Louis' face heats up. "I mean just so I can know where I'm going."  
  
"Of course." Louis stretches his arm out towards Harry and grabs onto his upper bicep. Oh god all those times he heard about how Harry works out really payed off because Louis can't even put his full hand around it. He moves his arm in between Harry and folds his arm back towards him at the elbow.  
  
"Okay let's go." Louis smiles and Harry leads then out of his building and onto the street. Sometimes Louis can walk out and go to a couple shops alone but it's extremely difficult because it changes so much. There might be a person sitting on the sidewalk, a group of people, gum or something spilled and it can mess Louis up completely and he might think he is miles away but he could actually be just outside his flat building.  
  
Overall being blind sucks.  
  
As they walk Louis wonders what it looks like to everyone else. Harry Styles the popstar helping some blind charity case probably. That's when Louis actually wonders if Harry is gay, bi or maybe he really is just using Louis for more publicly. That thought makes Louis frown.  
  
"You're going to love this place. It's adorable and the back of the chairs are heart shaped then there little salt and pepper shakers are cute glass bottles with heart tops. It's pretty much a place full of hearts." Harry says and Louis can hear the smile in his voice and maybe it's the one with the 'dimples' Louis heard about. He doesn't even know what dimples are but he has read about them before. Louis wonders if Harry will let him feel them one day, maybe.  
  
"Sounds lovely." Louis' voice is bitter and it's only because he wants to be able to see it and not just hear about it. It's sad really because sometimes Louis forgets what a shape looks like until he feels it again, for example right now. A heart is a symbol of love and it's red but the actual shape of it is unknown to Louis.  
  
"Sorry. I..um didn't mean to upset you it's just I've never met anyone like you before." Harry says and Louis can feel his eyes on him.  
  
"Blind?"  
  
"Yes. Also you're beautiful so I'm trying to impress you." Louis shakes his head at him. He's not beautiful. Louis has asked so many people what he looks like and they 'average' or 'girly' or 'feminine' or 'ugly' or 'young boy' and Louis' personal favorite 'just be lucky you're blind'. Also people don’t need to impress Louis because he can’t see anyway, Louis’ the one who needs to impress.  
  
"Why would you try to impress me? And please don't ever call me that again."  
  
"I want to impress you because there is something about you that I really like and your _beautiful_ looks are just a plus." Harry says and Louis can sense the smile or smirk or whatever the fuck it is on his face.  
  
"Well you don't need to take me to cute places to impress me. All you need to do is be yourself and stop calling me beautiful. Also you don’t even know me." Louis sighs and he honesty feels like a big dick. Why can't he just be normal? Like his dream guy is right here and be still messes up. Well Louis should be lucky that he's controlling himself enough around Harry. Louis knows everything about him so if they get to personal talking then Louis is going to act innocent about it. FYI: he doesn't.  
  
"Not yet and thank you." And it's a genuine thank you from Harry. Louis wonders about this boy. "So here we are." They stop walking and Louis can smell cookies and cake which causes his mouth to start watering. Harry leads them in the door.  
  
"Hello, how man-." The host stops talking and Louis is super confused because she could've just had her throat slip and Louis doesn't even know it. See these are the things you think of when you're blind. "Oh my god. You're Harry Styles!!" She whisper shouts and Louis wants to cover his ears because she's squeaking now.  
  
"Yeah. How about we make a deal? You won't tell anyone I'm here until I leave and you give a picture?" The smile is Harry's voice is so fake. He has boredom sprinkled all over that statement. Louis may be blind but he isn't stupid.  
  
"Yes of course!" Her squeaking doesn't stop and it's really annoying.  
  
"Let us sit down first and then you'll get your picture." She must of nodded or something because she leads Louis and Harry to their table.  
  
"Can you help me sit?" Louis whispers into what he thinks is Harry's ear.  
  
"Of course love." Ten more steps and they reach their table. Louis takes his jacket off and someone takes it, hopefully Harry, then those soft hands are on his lower back. "Crouch down a little." Harry whispers in his ear. Louis does as he's told and his knee caps hit the chairs seat and Louis makes the rest of his way down.  
  
"Thank you." Louis says and puts his hands out to see how far away the table is. About four inches.  
  
"I'm going to go take the picture I'll be right back." Harry says and Louis nods at him. That's another perk to being blind he can nod all he wants and people will see it.  
  
Louis sits there with his hands in his lap and enjoys the smell of the bakery. Cupcakes are Louis' favorite dessert because it's a mini cake! Like who wouldn't want that.  Louis sits there for what feels like forever (twenty minutes) and Harry still isn't back. Maybe he left. This could of have just been a big joke. Harry brings the blind person somewhere he doesn't know and just leaves him. He probably paid that girl to do this for him. Or maybe that part was just lucky she was a fan.

Oh who is he kidding Harry  is long gone.   
  
Louis reaches for his phone in his jacket, his jacket that he gave to Harry! The blind boy mentally slaps himself as he has furious tears fill up in his eyes. Harry Styles is a dick and Louis hates him.  
  
Louis stands up slowly and try's to find his surroundings. He doesn't know anything expect the way they came in which is diagonally right of him. Louis starts moving, hands out, to what he hopes is the door. Harry could be standing by and silently laughing at him. Maybe that fan is laughing with him. Louis hopes they fucking enjoy it because if he ever hears them again he'll kill em.  
  
Of course Louis bumps his hip into the corner of a table.

"Fuck!" Louis puts his right hand over the soon to be bruise. You think he's ran into enough things for it to not hurt anymore but nope. He takes a couple deep breaths and continues to find his way out with his left hand. He can hear cars in the distance and he knows he's going the right way. Louis follows the car sounds until he reaches a cold smooth surface, the door. He slides his hand along the door until he reaches the door handle.

  
"Louis?" He freezes, his hand still on the handle. "Where are you going?"  
  
"I'm not stupid Harry." He spits back at him.  
  
"I never said you were."  
  
"Ha. Ha. Well I can take a hint okay."  
  
"What are you talking about?" Harry's voice moving as he walks around. God Louis hates that.  
  
"Please don't walk when you talk, it gives me headaches."  
  
"Sorry." Directly in front. One step away.  
  
"Do you have my jacket?" Louis asks as he lets go of the door handle.  
  
"Yeah."

"Can I have it back?" Louis puts his hand out. "I need to call my sister."

"What? Why?" Harry sounds confused and slightly angry. "You can't ruin out date we didn't even start it yet!" Totally angry.

  
"Well I'm sorry I don't remember having a _date_ where someone left me for forever to take a goddamn picture." Louis snaps back. "Give me my jacket I'm going home."  
  
"Louis." He places the jacket in Louis' still outstretched hand. "I'm sorry." Louis ignores him and presses the button on his phone.  
  
"Call Lottie."

"Calling Lottie." Thank you Jenny.

"I didn't want to leave you I mean I was coming right back when I found you by the door." _found_ you. He _found_ Louis. Like he is some fucking dog or toddler that got lost. Harry Styles isn't like anything he thought.  
  
"Fuck you Harry." Louis then walks out the doors as best as he can and finds a good place to sit aha against the restaurant wall.

  
"Louis did you call to apologize?" Lottie answers.  
  
"No. Come pick me up."  
  
"What?! Why?"

"Please just come get me." Louis begs. She says yes and they hang up. Louis sits and waits for Lottie.  
  
Harry thinks that he's a famous popstar and can do anything. No if he was so commented on this 'date' then he wouldn't have left. Then worst of all he just let Louis go. The blind boy who is worthless, of course he let it go. He probably did this is on purpose. Fuck you Harry Styles and your perfect fucking voice and personality that Louis loves so much.  
  
The angry tears are back and Louis doesn't fight them or the sobs that come with it. What he doesn't know is Harry is sitting twenty feet away from him, feeling guilty as ever.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is horrible! Im sorry for this chapter!

Louis spends the rest of the night in his bed covered in tears and multiple blankets to tired and sad to do anything after Lottie drops him off. One might say he's overreacting but when your idol takes you out and breaks your already cracked heart then this is necessary.  
  
Louis sniffs and grabs another tissue to whip his face off. He opens his eyes to find out what time it is and he's reminded by the fact that he's a useless blind soul. More tears happen.

You think that he would know he is blind but when he gets into moods like this, tears and yells, then he focuses on the main reason why he’s like that and forgets that he is blind so when he opens his eyes more tears are bond to happen. It’s horrible and so many people tell Louis to focus on the good things in life but when you are blind there is nothing good.

Half an hour later and the sobs cease but the tears are still flowing. After he calms himself down he searches for his phone and presses the button.  
  
"What is the time?" He sniffs.  
  
"The time is 3:46 am." Louis nods to her and snuggles deeper into his mattress. He's such a fucking sensitive guy that it's embarrassing, no wonder he’s single.  
  
"Incoming call from Harry." Louis' freezes and listened as Jenny repeats herself five more times before she stops. Louis holds his breath as he waits for something to happen.  
  
"Voicemail from Harry." Jenny says. Louis reaches his hand out slowly and pressed the button and quickly brings his hand back under the covers to his safety.   
  
"Listen to the voicemail." His voice is shaking but at least he's done crying, maybe because he's terrified of what it's going to say.  
  
"Hey um Louis? I guess you're sleeping because it is super early but I just wanted to.." He trails off and Louis wonders if it's over but Harry sighs and continues. "I'm so fucking sorry, Louis. I really am." Then the message is over. Short and stupid.  
  
Oh. Why the fuck would he want until now to call him? He could have apologized earlier. Fuck you Harry. Louis rolls away from his phone and falls asleep.  
  
*  
  
Louis wakes up to loud banging on his door and he knows he won’t get there any time soon but he tires. The blind boy untangles himself from his blankets and stands up. He is still wearing the same clothes as yesterday and his hair is probably super messy and sticking up everywhere. His sunglasses are somewhere in his house but he doesn't know where, he threw them off when he got home.  
  
Louis turns and makes his robotic pathway out of his room. As soon as he passes through the doorway he puts his hand on the wall and slowly moves to the door. The banging not ceasing as he walks.  
  
"One minute!" Louis yells and the banging stops as Louis tumbles the last couple steps to the door. His hands flies out and he slides them down until they reach the handle. He unlocks the door the opens it halfway. "Hello?" He asks with his eyes closed, no sunglasses.  
  
"Louis you will never believe who called me last night." Lottie walks in and turns to him.  
  
"You could have just called me you know instead of driving across London." Louis points out and closes the door and turns around towards Lottie.  
  
"This isn't over the phone information."  
  
"Fine who called you?" Louis sighs.  
  
"Okay so it was right after I dropped you off and my phone rang and it was Harry."

“Who?” Louis knows exactly who but he wants to hear it.

“Harry Styles.”  
  
"Of course." Louis sighs and rubs his head.  
  
"He was balling Louis. The famous popstar Harry Styles was crying his heart out. He was telling me that he ruined everything and he wants to be with you but he doesn't know how to approach you." Lottie claps her hands and continues. "Then he asked me all these questions on how he should deal with you and how to get you to like him, which you already do but like personal."  
  
Louis is speechless.  
  
"The whole time I could hear him writing down. Louis he was writing it all down so he knew what to do!" She squeaks. "You have to call him Louis. Give him a second chance." She pleads.  
  
"Lottie." He starts.  
  
"No don't Lottie me. You like him, he likes you and you are going to call him back. I need to go before mum realizes I'm gone and if you don't call him I'll come back here and kill you myself." Lottie walks passed Louis and out the door leaving him confused as ever.  
  
Harry called his sister to find out about Louis. Maybe he wants Louis. But why? To make fun of him again? Use him for charity? There is nothing special about Louis. Small, big thighs, tummy that he feels hangs over his jeans, messy greasy hair, and the worse feature of all his dull cloudy blind eyes.

But Harry called his _sister._  
  
He could really want Louis. But again why? The blind boy will just drag him behind. Louis will just ruin things for Harry because Harry's going to need to watch him. Harry comes fame and that's not going to be too good for blind Louis.

But Harry called his _sister._  
  
Louis should call him. Yeah it didn't end well but Louis read about some pretty great relationships that started good.  
  
Ugh.  
  
Louis knows what he needs (wants) to do. He finds the wall and follows it back to his room. He walks in a straight path to his bedside table and presses the button on his phone.  
  
"Call Harry." His voice is rough and he's so nervous that he thanks whoever created the cell phone so they don’t have to do this in person, not that it’s much different because either way Louis won’t be able to see.  
  
"Calling Harry." Jenny says. Louis thinks about what to say but the phone only rings once and then Harry answers.  
  
"Louis?" His voice is full of hope and Louis can't help but smile that Harry Styles has hope when he calls.  
  
"Uh hi Harry." Louis bites his lip.  
  
"Louis thank god you called I just wanted to say that I-"  
  
"How about we do this in person?" Louis blurts out. What?! That’s not how it goes!?!?!  
  
"Yeah of course. I can be at your house in fifteen minutes." Harry rushes through his words like his half paying attention. Louis can hear him shuffling through stuff.  
  
"Okay."  
  
"Okay see you soon." That's it. That's there call. Louis is just going to let Harry win him back and Louis isn't going to do anything about it. Yesterday was just a bump in the road for Louis and like a bad song for Harry. Louis giggles at his own joke.  
  
Fifteen minutes isn't enough time for Louis to take a shower so he decides to just change his clothes. Turning completely around Louis walks straight forward five steps to his dresser, where he feels around until he finds a soft sweater that is too big for him and some comfy jeans. Louis slips them on and quickly walks into the bathroom to brush his teeth.  
  
When Louis starts looking for sunglasses and only makes it to his bathroom is when Harry arrives. Louis makes his way, with the wall, to the door. He opens it with his eyes closed.  
  
"Come in." His voice is quiet and shy. Why Louis? You're already useless blind person don't make this harder.  
  
Harry walks into the door, or he hopes its Harry, and stands 3 steps away from Louis once he closes the door.  
  
"So do you want to sit down?" Louis asks shyly.  
  
"Yeah that's great." Okay it's Harry. Louis leans them over to the living room and he sits on the sofa, Harry sits at the other end. It's awkward right now. So awkward. "I'm sorry. I feel terrible I shouldn't have left you there like that. She was just attacking me about everything and I couldn't tell her to leave me alone because then bad publicly. Anyone else would have been fine with it and I'm glad you weren't because you're different and I like that about you." Harry takes a deep breath. "I know your sister talked to you so you know everything. But I want to know how to deal with you, how you move, how you live, I want to know everything so that I can be the best I can be."  
  
"The best what?" Louis asks.  
  
"First acquaintances then friends and someday" Harry clears his throat. "Boyfriends."

If Louis could see he would notice the eyes full of hope staring at him.  
  
"Wow." Boyfriends. Wait?! Is Harry gay or bi it what??!?  
  
"So what do you say? Can I have another chance?" Louis turns his body so that it semi facing Harry.

“Harry-.”

“Listen I know my explanation and apology fucking suck but Louis I can make you happier and laugh and I know I sound conceded but I can do so much for you and I really want to. I want to do everything and anything for you.” Harry moves closer and honestly all this begging is super cute to Louis.  
  
"Don't mess it up." He jokes and strong arms are around him and the delicious smell of cologne is filling up Louis' nostrils. Louis cautious moves his arms and puts them around Harry. The smaller boy feels like he could stay like this forever, Harry's arms around him always protecting him.  
  
"So are you doing anything right now?" Harry pulls back and Louis misses the warmth and smell.  
  
"No." He giggles.  
  
"Great. Let's talk." And they do. For hours on end. They talk about their families and Louis already knows about Harry's but Harry doesn't know that. They talk about their favorite everything's and Louis learns so much about Harry. He thought he knew everything but boy was he wrong.  
  
Harry is funny and his voice is deep and soothing and when he tells boring story's Louis doesn't mind because he savors his voice. To Louis’ voices are like chocolate, tasty and always there. Harry moves closer to him throughout the night and soon the two boys are leaning and laughing together.  
  
"You're eyes are really pretty." Louis stops laughing and tenses up. He totally forgot that he didn't have his sunglasses. Oh my god. This is horrible. Two days in a row and Harry Styles has seen his _disgusting_ eyes. "I'm sorry if that made you uncomfortable it’s just." Louis feels Harry move closer. "They're really pretty, just like you." Harry moves until he is only an inch away from Louis' lips. Louis wants him to kiss him but when Louis leans in a phone starts ringing.  
  
Louis jumps back shyly and his face heats up as Harry groans.  
  
"Hello? Right now? Come on- fine." Harry hangs up and the room is silent. "I need to go the boys need me to finish recording a song." Harry's voice is dull and Louis hopes that because he doesn't want to leave not because of Louis.  
  
"It's okay. I guess I'll see you later?" Louis hopes he says yes.   
  
"Of course. Bye love." Harry hugs him before getting up and Louis listens to his loud footsteps and the sound of the door opening and closing.

They are totally not acquaintances.

*

Louis spends the rest of the day looking for his sunglasses and it shouldn’t take so long but Louis keeps stopping to laugh at something Harry said or reassure himself that Harry actually likes him.

By the time Louis finds his sunglasses its super late. So he maneuvers his way to his bedroom and changes into pj’s. As he lays down he presses his phone.

“3 new messages.”

“Open messages.” Louis closes his eyes and snuggles into the bed.

“One new message from Harry: I had a great day today Louis’ I hope you did too.” Yeah he did. “One new message from Harry: Also just wanted to say that even though it hasn’t been a full 24 hours I want you to know that in my mind were friends.” Louis squeals at that because he’s not the only one to think it and blind Louis Tomlinson is _friends_ with the famous Harry Styles. “One new message from Harry: Let’s get lunch tomorrow. I’ll pick you up at noon?” Louis squeals again.

He reaches for his phone and replies with “Lunch it is.” Louis wants to put a smiley face but his phone is not that advanced.

Louis falls asleep and dreams of warmth and good smelling cologne.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its better than last chapter but still ehhh 
> 
> Enjoy :)

Louis is up and in the shower at six am. Yeah it's not going to take him six hours to get ready for his date...or at least that's he hopes it won’t take him that long.

He's rubbing shampoo in his hair when he realizes that he was thinking date. It's not a date it's just a lunch...thingy. Actually it could be a date because Harry never said what it was exactly. Louis finishes his shower and it's about 6:50 now. Being blind is going to extend times so almost an hour shower isn't bad for Louis at all; usually it’s over an hour.  
  
The boy moves his way to his dresser and feels around for the next thirty minutes for the clothes he wants. He needs to look good even though he won't see Harry will see him and that's important to him. He isn’t sure where they are going but he can only hope it’s not the stupid restaurant Harry took him to before.

Louis decides to wear his tightest pair of jeans and one of his favorite sweaters because it’s not exactly warm out. He puts his clothes and sunglasses on and moves his way along the wall to the kitchen. He is starting to actually get his house so soon he’ll, hopefully, walk though it without a problem.

The blind boy pours himself some cereal. He hums happily as he swings his legs and eats at his table thinking about what can happen today.

Harry could take him anywhere and it wouldn’t matter to Louis, as long as it doesn’t smell then Louis doesn’t care. He would love it if Harry took him to a garden, full of flowers that Louis can sniff and name off by heart. Or a library where he can run his fingers along the spines and pages of the normal books that everyone reads, the smooth pages that slip through his finds are just amazing to him. He doesn’t remember what words look like exactly and when he asks people say they are like shapes and well, he isn’t good at remembering shapes so the subject usually changes.

That’s why Louis doesn’t have many friends. Not because he’s blind but because he asks questions that make the other person uncomfortable because they don’t know how to answer and that’s how Louis discovered that he was a freak. A freak with no friends and a bad past experience.

Louis finishes his cereal and washes the bowl before putting it back in cupboard, two left from the sink. He has plastic bowls because glass breaks and if it breaks around him then he will most likely step on it and cut himself. He can’t deal with that.

He presses the button on his phone.

“What is the time?”

“The time is 8:36 am.” Jenny replies. Louis wishes she was real so he could actually talk to her but you don’t always get what you want and Louis really wants his eyes back but that’s not happening anytime soon, or in Louis’ life.

He wonders if he will get his eyes whenever he dies.

He spends the rest of the morning sitting on his window seal with his legs pulled in and arms wrapped around then as he rests his chin on his knees and listening to the outside world. The cars honking, screeching, starting, squeaking, chugging, the people talking, laughing, yelling, fighting, singing, and if he listens closely he can hear the music playing from the building across the street. He only wishes he could see so that he can watch everything happen. Watch the joy or sadness on people’s faces, the different colors and types of cars and maybe see his neighbor dancing to their music.

If only Louis didn’t-

A knock on the door brings Louis out of his thoughts and he moves slowly to the door angry at himself that he was going to think about the indecent.

“Hello?” He asks when he opens the door, which he should really stop doing because murders.

“Whoa you look great Lou.”

“Oh thanks Harry.” Louis’ face heats up as he feels Harry’s eyes on him studying him and Louis wishes he didn’t because Louis can’t study him back and that’s unfair.

“Yeah so are you ready to go?” Harry’s deep voice is just one of the best sounds Louis heard and he has heard a lot.

“Yeah let me get my phone.” Louis walks back to the kitchen and grabs it from the table. “Okay let’s go.” He smiles and he can only hope it’s not too ugly. Louis walks out the door and closes it behind him. He doesn’t even need to ask to use Harry’s arm because those soft hands are moving his arm though Harry’s bend elbow. Louis ducks his head as he tries to hide his smile. Harry is just perfect.

“I think you’ll like where we are going.” Harry says when they step out of Louis’ building.

“Will I?” Louis shivers from the wind and wishes he would have grabbed a jacket.

“Hell yeah.” Louis giggles at him and they walk ten more minutes when Louis hears the rushing water and quacking of ducks.

“The lake?” Louis asks as they stop and he can hear Harry moving something.

“The river actually.” Harry grabs Louis hand. “Sit.” And Louis does right on a soft blanket and he hears Harry sit down next to him.

“Lunch down by the river.” Louis mumbles as a smile spreads across his face.

“What?” Harry’s voice is muffled like his face is in a box or something.

“Nothing. What are you doing?” Louis turns his body so he is facing Harry with his legs crossed.

“Lunch.” Harry hands Louis a glass plate which makes Louis frown. “Don’t frown you’ll get wrinkles and a pretty face like yours can’t get those.” Harry says and Louis rolls his eyes behind is glasses because that’s not true it’s more like he can’t get any more wrinkles because he has so many already, he feels them every day.

“So what do we have for lunch today?” Louis changes the subject and if he could see then he would have saw Harry’s look of sympathy thrown at him.

“My famous homemade cheeseburgers, very American of me.” Harry says with proudness. Louis reaches his hands carefully onto the plate and grabs the burger and takes a bite of it. He smiles at the taste of melted cheese and the perfect amount of mustard and ketchup. He takes another bite and he tastes something else, something sweet in it.

“Taco seasoning?” Louis asks as he takes another bite.

“Oh my god! Shhh! No one is supposed to know that. How did you even find out? There is no way you can taste it.” Harry panics but Louis can hear the joke in his voice.

“Heightened senses.” Louis giggles and taps his sunglasses for emphasizes.

“That’s so unfair but I’ll let it slide as long as you promise not to tell anyone and when I say anyone I mean _anyone_.” Harry mumbles through his bite of food.

“I promise.” Louis smiles and they talk some more, mostly about Harry’s food.

*

“What time is it?” Louis asks Harry after the finished their meal and are now walking down the length of the river.

“Somewhere around three.” Louis nods towards him and tries not to shiver from the cold breeze the river is blowing at them but of course he fails.

“Are you cold?” Louis knows Harry is looking at him because his voice is closer than when it would be when he looks away.

“No.” Yes

“Are you sure?”

“Yes Harry, I’m fine.” No I’m freezing!

“Here take my jacket.” Harry is slipping out of Louis’ arm and Louis shakes his head as he hears Harry taking his jacket off.

“No, Harry pleas-“ Harry slips the jacket on Louis’ shoulders and Louis curses himself for not knowing that Harry moved behind him because he was to distracted by talking. Stupid Louis. Harry moves them back, arm and arm.

“You can thank me later.” Harry jokes as they start walking again and Louis has to admit that the warm heaving jacket sooths him because it smell like good cologne. Louis could live with this cologne forever.

“Thank you Harry.” Louis mumbles and looks down as he feels the blush spread across his cheeks. “What does this jacket look like?” Louis wonders.

“Um it’s like a light brown on the outside and the inside is a dark brown fur..?”

“I just wanted to know if it matched my outfit.” Louis jokes, he really wants to know so that when Harry leaves him Louis can tell the story of how he went out to lunch with Harry Styles and he gave him his jacket, and people like details. Then again Louis has no friends so it just matters to him.

“Hey Louis.”

“Yeah?”

“Is that a normal question for you?” Oh no. This is where he loses people all because he asks stupid fucking questions that make no sense. He says one stupid thing and then everything friendship he has is over. Being friends with a blind person is like standing on a cliff but answering an obvious question pushes them over the edge. It’s not their fault either, it is his and it’s all because he is blind. He doesn’t want to lose Harry but it’s not even like whatever they are is going to last and it’s better to rip off a band aid then to slowly pull it off. So here goes the band aid.

“Yeah, I ask things like that a lot.” Louis breaths out quickly as he squeezes his eyes closed behind his glasses and waits.

“Sweet. I like weird questions.” What? “The boys always yell at me because I find big meaning about things and I try to tell them and they don’t give two fucks but maybe you’ll appreciate it more.” Louis can hear the smile in Harry’s voice and honestly Louis is excited to what Harry sees because Louis can’t see anything unless it’s written down.

“You want to answer another one?” Louis asks him as a million different of questions pop in his head that everyone else knows the answer to but Louis doesn’t and he _really_ wants to. Right now it’s different for Louis because he’s opening up, yeah not much and some might say not at all but so many people tell him they can answer his questions and he just keeps them in because he’s too scared.

“Yes!”

“What’s a hipster?” Louis asks and Harry goes on a rant for twenty minutes about it and how people think about them, how they are, how they think they are etc. In the end though Louis feels like he fully understands everything about a hipster and it’s a good feeling. He’s a little closer to being normal.

“Come on ask me another one!” He asks after he finishes his hipster rant.

“Okay.” Louis giggles. “This one is directed to you. Can you buy happiness?”  

“In all honesty, you can buy things that you want and that makes you happy but at the end of the day it all depends on the person, if someone likes objects then objects will make him happy.” Harry takes a pause.

“What makes you happy?” Louis cuts in.

“You.” Harry answers, not even a silent hesitation. Louis gulps and suddenly feels every awkward and uncomfortable.

“Harry, you barely know me, I can’t make you happy.” I can barely make myself happy but he will never say that out loud.

“I don’t know Louis, something about me just makes me smile and it’s the type of smile you can’t get down.” This subject needs to change.

“What’s that smile like?” Louis asks knowing that Harry will jump at the opportunity to answer and he does. Louis wants to know the answer but it’s hard to focus on what Harry’s saying because Louis making Harry happy is floating in his head. Harry makes him happy too, obviously like he went to the fucking concert and loves his and the other boys music. When he listens to One Direction though he has a special smile and maybe that’s what Harry is talking about.

“I’m sorry Louis but our date is over.” Harry says and Louis frowns not wanting it to end but internally happy that it’s a date. “We are outside your door and I wanted to give you something.” Louis listens as Harry digs through something and a thin plastic square is being placed in his hand. “It’s out new album, Midnight Memories. It’s not out yet but I wanted you to have it.”

“Oh no Harry I can’t take this.” He tries to shove to back at Harry but he can’t see where he is.

“I know that the boys and I give you happiness so have some more.”

Louis shakes his head at him. “No I-“

“Sorry love, but it’s all yours now. Goodbye babe.” Harry moves closer to Louis and soft lips are on his cheek. Louis listens to Harry’s footsteps move farther and farther away as he stands their and realizes that their music isn’t the only thing that makes him happy. Harry makes him happy and Louis feels good about whatever they are.

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so far this fic has really sucked and i have good ideas but i have to work up to them so bare with me for the next couple of chapters and then it should get a lot better!
> 
> sorry this sucks but
> 
> Enjoy! :)

A week passes and its November 1st. Harry hasn’t contacted Louis since their date at the river but Louis has and he regrets it. Harry never replied to any of his texts or voice mail, he never picked up his phone and Louis would usually give up after the first non-answered text because he can ‘take a hint’ but nope not when it comes to Harry. He uses the excuse that he still has Harry’s jacket to get Harry to answer but it hasn’t worked.  
  
Louis has school on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays so he wants to hang out with Harry before then. Now it’s Friday of course and all Louis has done today was listen to the album Harry gave him and that’s when Louis realizes that he has no friends and Harry does so that’s might be why he didn’t answer him.  
  
But deep down Louis knows it’s because he’s too much of a hassle. He could hear how annoyed Harry was getting on their date. And everything on Louis hurts because, for once, he thought he actually had a shot with someone but who would want plain old blind Louis. No one expectably not famous Harry Styles.  
  
Some might say that Louis thinks too low of himself but in reality people think too highly of him.   
  
Blind and annoying. That's why he is. People used to tell him that he was lucky he was blind because then he wouldn't have to see his ugliness. That actually started before Louis was blind.  
  
Louis shakes his head so he doesn't have to think about the haunting incident.  
  
He works in half an hour and if he doesn't get dressed now he'll be late. Louis shuts off his music and walks to his dresser and grabs his work clothes off the top of it. Nice black pants and a light blue button down.  
  
After making sure he has his keys and phone in his (Harry's but no one needs to know) jacket Louis walks out of his home and runs straight into a firm body. Louis falls back onto his ass because of the impact.

"Oh my god!" Harry? "Louis are you okay?" Why is Harry here?  
  
Harry's hands are on Louis and pulling him back up as he mutter apologizes.  
  
"I'm fine Harry." Louis is stern and rude but Harry doesn't call him back but he shows up at his home so Louis has a good reason.   
  
"You look nice where are you going?" Harry's is happy and it makes Louis roll is eyes which are underneath his sunglasses.  
  
"Why are you here Harry? You haven't replied to me at all!" Louis snaps and then covers his mouth because he did not just say that. He sounds like a desperate obsessed girl. No No No! Louis shakes his head as he starts walking forward and to work.  
  
"Louis wait!" Harry is right beside Louis in mere seconds. "I know I haven't replied but it's because I wanted to do this in person." Louis keeps walking.  
  
"Do what in person?" He snaps as they walk out of his building and Louis doesn’t even know where this attitude is coming from.  
  
"Ask you to be my boyfriend." Louis' feet stop and he is glued to the ground. The cars are driving by and Louis wonders how many are staring at a petrified blind person and the famous Harry Styles. "So do you want to be my boyfriend?" Harry has now moved in from of Louis about half a foot away.  
  
Louis has never been gladder that he has sunglasses because the tears are starting to sneak out of his eyes.  
  
"No." This is the worst joke in the entire world. Louis can't believe that this would ever happen. He thought that Harry was a good person.  
  
"I thought we really connected though." Harry's voice is sad but Louis can hear the hit of hope in it and it makes the tears fall out of his eyes. "Why are you crying Louis?"  
  
Louis puts his face in his hands. His glasses crush his face as he shakes his head at Harry. This is humiliating.  
  
"Louis-" Louis pushes past Harry as he makes his short route that is engraved into his brain to work ignoring Harry's yells. When he first got the job he walked it over a million times and that’s why he doesn’t know the way around his own home, because he was busy getting his work route down.  
  
Louis rushes into the back door of his work and falls onto the ground. He curls into a ball as he sobs into his hands.  
  
Not even a minute goes by and soft big hands are around his waist. Louis shakes his head because Harry can't be here. Harry pulls Louis into in his lap and the crying boy struggles for a few minutes but gives up and cries into Harry's shirt.  
  
Harry is whispering soothing words into Louis ear as he rubs his back. Louis takes in the scent of Harry and cries more when he smells that cologne that haunts the jacket.  
  
He is sitting on Harry's lap crying about Harry. What is happening? This is so new to Louis, nothing like this would have ever happened before.  
  
"Louis." Harry's voice is full of pain. Louis sniffs and whips his face on his sleeve. "I want you to be my boyfriend. I want you to be happy and when I look at you, you have this mask on and I don't know why but I want to discover what's underneath it."  
  
"No you don't." Louis mumbles into Harry's shirt. All he's going to find is that Louis is a worthless blind piece of shit.  
  
"Come on Louis. Please I want to be your boyfriend; you don't have to show me what's under the mask until you're ready." Never. He's never going to be ready, because as soon as Louis tells him, he'll lose him.  
  
"You aren't even gay Harry. You're the straight member of One Direction that all girls faint over." Louis moves his head so it's facing his own lap.  
  
"Actually I'm bi." Harry laughs and it makes Louis crack a smile. "And I really want you."  
  
"No you don't."  
  
"Let me prove it to you."  
  
"How?"

"Give me a week. Be my boyfriend for a week and you will see." Louis can do that. It's simple and easy. A week and that's all Harry will need to be running as far away from Louis as he can.  
  
"Okay." Louis agrees and wet lips are on his cheek. Louis blushes as he realizes that he needs to get to work. He gets off Harry's lap, which was extremely comfy, and stands up. Harry follows him.  
  
"When are you done working?"  
  
"7"  
  
"I'll come pick you up. Bye love."  
  
"Bye Harry." Louis turns and follows the wall to find the grand piano that he loves so much. He sits down and runs his fingers over the keyboard and gets to work.  
  
Louis is halfway through his shift when he realizes that Harry is just going to use his for some charity thing and then toss him to the streets. Louis thought he was being smooth by showing Harry that he isn't worth it but he's just failing into Harry's publicity stunt.  
  
Louis lets a few tears slips as he fixes himself back into his music.  
  
*  
  
"You all done." Louis has finished working and is now standing at the back door.  
  
"Yeah." Louis plays with his sleeve as Harry moves closer.  
  
"You are really good." Harry says as he moves Louis' arm into his own.  
  
"Not really." Louis shakes his head. "I'm decent."  
  
"Decent enough to play in a beautiful restaurant like that." Harry leads them outside into the cold November air. "I mean it's an alright place nothing-"  
  
"It’s fine Harry. I felt around the place enough to know it’s pretty fancy, just a bunch of rich snobs go there."  
  
"Hey! I was one of those rich snobs today!" Harry gaps and Louis giggles at him. "I mean I had to watch my boyfriend play." Louis blushes and lowers his head at Harry's comment. He's killing Louis and it hasn't even been a good couple of hours yet.  
  
*  
  
Louis and Harry have been sitting in an awkward silence on Louis' couch for the last ten minutes.  
  
"When you said earlier that you felt the restaurant what did you mean?" Harry asks and of course it's a weird question pertaining to Louis' blindness.  
  
"Well when I got the job I asked to feel around because it gives me a mental picture of the restaurant. It helps me see it in my mind."  
  
"Do you want to feel my face?" Harry blurts out.  
  
"What?" Louis chokes out. He barely feels anyone's face and when he does they've already know each other for more than a year.  
  
"Here." Harry moves closer to Louis as picks up his wrists. Louis is frozen as Harry moves his hands to Harry's face. This is going to be Louis' only chance to touch Harry and get a good picture so he's going to take it.  
  
"Go for it." Harry let's go of Louis' wrist and Louis is memorized and he hasn't even moved his hands. The smooth soft checks are fantastic. Louis moves his finger slowly, opening and closing them on Harry's cheeks. He slides his hands down Harry's cheeks and traces his jaw line. The sharp corner representing the start of Harry's chin but small signs of facial hair is there.  
  
He moves his fingers up Harry's jaw and along the hair line. His fingers meet at the top of Harry's head and Louis moves them over the rough surface of Harry's forehead. Harry's face is clam but Louis can still feel the worry lines that lie in his skin. No nineteen year old should have worry lines like that.  
  
His fingers travel over the soft hairs of his eyebrows and over the closes eyes. Harry's eyelashes are short just like how a guy‘s should be, Louis has felt his own and they are too long. Louis wishes he could feel colors because he wants those green eyes that everyone loves.  
  
Harry's nose is skinny and long. It has a perfect tiny bump in the middle made for holding the 'sinful' sunglasses Louis always hears about.  
  
Louis runs his finger down and he knows that the lips are next but-  
  
"Smile." Louis commands and Harry's cheeks are rising and Louis runs over the bumps of Harry's cheeks. Smooth until the now showing worry wrinkles on Harry's forehead. Louis runs his finger over each one and wonders why Harry has so many. Louis' fingers slip into the deep dimples and trace inside of them. They are like small sideways smiles.  
  
"Stop please." Louis says and Harry face is relaxing as Louis moves his fingers to Harry's lips. So smooth yet rough, said to be bright pink. Louis feels the chapped spots on them and the little peach fuzz around them. Louis' arms are getting closer to him as he feels Harry's face. Harry is moving closer to Louis and quickly Louis moves his arms down from Harry's face.

Harry is perfect and all Louis touched was his face.  
  
Those soft lips that Louis was just touching are suddenly against his own kissing him. Harry’s lips feel so good and Louis has never felt like this before, he doesn’t deserve to feel like this. So he moves his hands to Harry's chest and gently pushes him away.  
  
"Sorry." Harry says as he leans away from Louis who turns his head towards his lap.  
  
"It's okay." There is an awkward silence in which Louis brings his knees to his chest and wraps his arm around his legs. "You're beautiful by the way." Louis says as his face heats up because he just told Harry Styles is beautiful and he obviously already knows that.  
  
"Thanks Louis but I could never be as gorgeous as you." Harry’s voice is full of truth and it disgusts Louis that Harry can say that without laughing.

"Stop." Louis mumbles and puts his chin on his knees.  
  
"Why?" The cushions by Louis sink as Harry moves closer. "Why do I have to stop? Why can't I tell my boyfriend that he's the most gorgeous thing in the entire world- no universe?" Harry's arms are circling around Louis and pull them close together. Louis is stiff as a board as Harry puts his chin on top of Louis’ head.

Louis doesn't want to tell Harry that he's ugly and that Harry should be begging to go blind so he doesn’t have to look at Louis’ ugly face. Who knows maybe Harry will go blind because Louis.

 “I think it’s time for me to go to bed.” Louis says but he makes no sign of moving out of Harry’s arm. He’ll miss the heat Harry gives off and the fact that for once in Louis’ blind life, he isn’t alone.

“Louis-“

“Goodnight Harry.” He mumbles out and Harry sighs as he releases Louis. The cushions rise as Harry stands up, Louis can feel his eyes on him so he says as still as possible.

“Goodnight Louis.” His voice is sad and honesty Louis feels horrible. Harry leaves and Louis doesn’t move from that spot. He is a horrible person by just kicking Harry out like that. Like who even does that? But it’s better because Harry has already given up on Louis. Louis wants this relationship so bad but he’s not worth it. He is just a waste of time and Harry Styles barely ever has time to himself and he shouldn’t have to spend it with the blind boring Louis.

Louis holds his tears in as he walks to his bedroom and lies in his bed. He doesn’t deserve to cry. Why is he crying? Because _he_ kicked Harry out, that’s why and that is a pathetic excuse to cry.

Louis’ eyes are so fucking useless but they still manage to make the salty tears that Louis hates so much. Harry should be crying because Louis was a complete and total dick to him. Louis falls asleep and what he doesn’t know is that Harry is in his own bed crying but not because the reason Louis thinks, no he’s crying because Louis is so perfect yet he thinks so lowly of himself and Harry wants to help but he doesn’t know how.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is short and boring sorry! I tired to make it cute but i failed :/
> 
> I PROMISE this is going to get better i just need to work up to it! fillers are needed to get to the good stuff! 
> 
> have a happy thanksgiving if you are america!!
> 
> Enjoy! :)

Louis wakes up to someone pounding on his door and his phone ringing loudly from his bedside table. He groans as he rolls over to his bedside table and feels around for his phone and presses the button, answering the call.  
  
"Hello?" He moans out. He's never felt so tired before and he has no reason to be tired.  
  
"Hey love. It's Harry can you come to the door please?" Harry asks and something in Harry's voice lets Louis know that he is distracted by something other than their conversation right now.  
  
"Yeah. Give me a minute." Louis hears Harry mumble an okay as he ends the call and rolls out of bed. He reaches his arms above his head and sighs in relief when the sound of his back cracking echoes in the room.  
  
Louis scratches his tummy as he shuffles over to his dresser and grabs his sunglasses off of them. He walks quietly to the door. He doesn't need to use the wall anymore and makes it to the door perfectly.  
  
Louis fiddles with the lock before he is opening the door and is met with warm arms and good smelling cologne. Harry hugs him tightly and Louis timidly puts his own arms around Harry.  
  
"Hi, love." Harry whispers sweetly in his ear.  
  
"Hi, Harry." Louis blushes and Harry let's go of him. Louis hears the sound of something crackling but he ignores it and blames it on his sleepiness.  
  
"You're sleepy hair looks good on you." Harry says and closes the door.  
  
"Thanks." Louis says shyly and his face is probably redder than red right now.  
  
"I got you something." Harry says and he grabs Louis' hand and leads him over to the couch. Louis sits down facing where he thinks Harry is siting. "Here."  
  
A bag is being placed gently into Louis' hands; at least he knows that the crackling wasn’t imaginary. No one gives him presents. Yeah for Christmas and his birthday but other than that never. His mom used to say she got him a present and it was always an appointment to the eye doctor, they went to so many and each one always said the same thing 'without the surgery, that you can't afford, you will never see again'. Now the phrase 'you will never see again' is engraved into Louis' skull and haunts him in his darkest dreams.  
  
"Open it." Harry is sitting next to Louis now and the excitement in Harry is rubbing off on Louis. Louis smiles as he puts his hand in the bag and rips out the tissue paper and puts it in, what he thinks is Harry's lap. His hand goes back in and his fingers it something smooth. He runs his fingers over it, silk. Louis smiles as he gently grabs it and brings it out.  
  
He touches it all over and figures out it’s a shirt, a silk shirt. Which is Louis' favorite fabric but an all silk shirt is so expensive.

"What color is it?" Louis asks as his fingers run over the collar with a smile on his face.  
  
"Blue. Just like you're eyes." Harry is smiling Louis can feel it in his voice. And for the first time Louis isn't upset Harry said something about his eyes just only a little annoyed. "I um, I didn't a little research and discovered that silk is one of the best fabrics in the world."  
  
Louis nods and looks down as he tries to hide his smile that he just can’t get down. Harry did research for him. He's actually really trying, maybe he wants this relationship but not for long. Blindness is a life ruiner.  
  
"Thank you Harry." Louis says and takes one of the sleeves and rubs it on his face. Harry might be judging him so hard right now but it's fucking _silk_!  
  
"Welcome, love."  
  
"I'm going to try it on." Louis stands up and walks to his bedroom, his finger stoking the silk as he goes. He walks into the ballroom and slips his pj shirt off and slips the silk on. "Perfect." Louis says as he smooth’s it down. The feeling on the skin on his tummy and arms make him feel safe. If only he could have had something safe before- a soft knock from the doorway breaks Louis' trace.  
  
"It looks good on you." Harry says and Louis looks down as the blush spreads across his checks. "I was going to ask if you wanted to go get some lunch but then realized that you never had my spaghetti before so can I make you some lunch?."  
  
"Well." Louis giggles. "Obviously I don't owe any food ingredients other than a couple microwaveable meals. Hard to cook when you're blind." Louis laughs and yeah sometimes being blind is fun because he can make fun of it but other can’t. Harry chuckles deeply and Louis hears him take a step forward.  
  
"I was actually thinking about bringing you to mine. I already have all the stuff." Harry is too close to Louis and he feels uncomfortable.  
  
"No." Louis says and wrinkles his fingers together.  
  
"No?" Harry seams shocked. No one has ever said no before.  
  
"I don't do...sexual things Harry."  
  
"What!? That's not what I was asking!" Harry's voice sounds panicked and confused.  
  
"I read stories, Harry I know what happens after lunch." Louis says.  
  
"Yeah we cuddle on the couch and watch movies." Harry's says slowly and Louis blinks from behind his sunglasses.  
  
"Really?" Louis asks.  
  
"Yup. Lunch, cuddling and movies." Harry says and Louis giggles at him. He's never cuddled before and it excites him. Yeah he's a virgin with everything that deals with a relationship.  
  
"Oh okay." Louis faces his head down at his hands.  
  
"So whenever you're ready we can go."  
  
"Okay give me about ten minutes." Louis says and listens as Harry walks away. 4 steps is all it takes for Harry to walk across Louis' bedroom while for Louis it takes 7. Louis smiles because he finally figured out Harry's steps.  
  
*  
  
The ride to Harry's is filled with the radio and when someone says something about One Direction Harry changes the channel. Some of the songs Louis likes he's bob his head to the music but other than that he say really stiff in his seat.  
  
They pull to a stop and Harry turns off his car. Louis unbuckles his seat belt and goes to reach for the door handle but of course Harry is already there waiting to help him out.  
  
"This is the home of Harry E. Styles." Harry says as he takes Louis' hand and guides him away from the car. "It's just an old flat building with a cute parking garage attached to it."  
  
"Smells expensive." Louis says.  
  
"Don't you mean _sounds_ expensive?" Harry says slowly like he is talking to a young toddler who just can't understand something easy.  
  
"Nope." Louis pops the ‘p’ and giggles at himself. Harry leads Louis up two steps and into the warm building.  
  
"Hello, Mr. Styles." An old voice says about six feet away from Louis and Harry.  
  
"James." Harry replies. The two boys step into the elevator.  
  
"I told you it was expensive." Louis says when the doors close.  
  
"Louis." Harry laughs and Louis smiles because he made someone laugh. He actually had a funny joke for once.

“You have a receptionist.”

“Not just me everyone that lives here does.”

“And everyone that lives here is rich.” Louis points out and doesn’t even try to hide the smirk because he’s proven Harry wrong.

“Wipe that smirk off your face.” Harry laughs out and Louis shakes his head before giggling.  
  
The elevator dings and Harry leans Louis out and ten steps, for Louis, to the right. Louis waits as Harry fiddles with his keys. The blind boys rocks on the balls of his feet for while Harry does whatever the fuck he's doing.  
  
"Ah here we go." Harry grabs Louis' arm and yanks him into a room that smells exactly like Harry. And that's where it hits him. He's at Harry Styles house. Harry the famous boyband member, yeah Louis' at his house. No big deal or anything.  
  
"Oh my god!" Louis squeals. "I'm at Harry Styles house. This is so unreal!" Louis can't help it and as soon as it's out he just wants to he grab the words out of the air and shove them back down his throat.  
  
"Okay fanboy." Harry giggles. "Do you want a tour?" Harry asks and Louis nods his head quickly, still in shock of where he is. "How do we do this?" Harry asks timidly.  
  
"Oh simple, just lead me over to each obstacle and tell me what it is." That's how Louis discovers himself having a twenty minute conversation just about the rugs Harry owns because Harry says they are 'dangerous' because even he trips on them Louis said that he's and idiot.  
  
At the end of the tour Louis knows everything in Harry's home from his old year books in his hall closet to the dust bunnies under the TV in the living room. Louis asks why he doesn't just sweep it up and Harry said that animals have rights. For being famous he can be a total idiot. A really cute idiot.  
  
"I'm going to go boil the water." Harry says and starts walking not realizing that he still has Louis' arm.  
  
"Uh Harry?" Louis says as Harry pulls him through the kitchen door.  
  
"Yeah? Oh oops." Harry laughs. "Sorry Louis here just sits at the island." Harry laughs and leads Louis over to the Island where Louis hops into a comfy chair.  
  
Louis and Harry talk and laugh as Harry shuffles about and makes them lunch. The spaghetti he makes is to die for and Louis plans to get Harry to make him as much food as possible before this week ends.  
  
"This is so good." Louis moans as he shoves more spaghetti in his mouth and closes his eyes at the taste.  
  
"If you think that's good you should try my buffalo chicken dip." Harry says with a mouth full of spaghetti.  
  
"Buffalo chicken dip?" Louis asks after he swallows.  
  
"You don't know what buff chick dip is!?!" Harry shouts and Louis shakes his head at him. "You are in for a life time of delicious foods maybe by the delicious chef, H. Styles."  
  
"Cocky much?" Louis giggles. He chooses to ignore the fact that Harry said a life time, more like less than a week.  
  
"No, just confident." Louis can hear the smirk in his voice.  
  
The rest of the day they sit on the couch and listening to music. Only after Harry had a huge meltdown because Louis can't watch movies and that's what he told him they were going to do and Harry claimed he was a bad boyfriend about fifteen times. Louis couldn't hold back the little smiles every time Harry said boyfriend even though in six days Harry will be far gone.  
  
When Harry takes Louis' home he leaves him with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Louis falls asleep that night with tear stains because he's going to lose Harry and he’s already so attached.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually like this chapter. Its actually getting into the story more :)
> 
> Let me know what you think in the comments or ask me any questions all info is in the end notes.
> 
> Im sorry if its kind of rushed or scattered.
> 
> Love you guys!
> 
> Enjoy :)

"Hey Lou?" Harry asks from across the diner table that him and Louis are at. He came to Louis’ house and picked him up after he got home from school and to say Louis was surprised, when Harry showed up at his door asking for another date, would be an understatement.  
  
"Yeah?" Louis takes of sip of his tea and closes his eyes behind his sunglasses as the tea courses through him.  
  
"You know two days ago when you came to my house?"  
  
"When you made me that delicious spaghetti?" Louis smiles and leans his face on his hand because school today was exhausting and he really wants his bed.  
  
"Yeah. Well um...before we left when I asked you to come over and you thought we were going to do...sexual things." Harry leans closer to Louis and whispers nervously. "Do you not want to do sexual things? Um...with me?"  
  
Louis' face is red as red, he can feel it and its embarrassing. Louis searches through all his vocabulary something, anything, to say that will lift the awkward tension that had settled over them.  
  
"I mean not anytime soon if that's what you are thinking! I was just asking if in the future? Whenever you are ready or you don’t have to be ready. Wait! That’s not what I meant. I mean like do you- um like anything- god I don't know. Oh my god, just forget I said anything." Harry's voice is panicked, stressed and embarrassed.  
  
Sex doesn't sound appealing to Louis because everyone says it feels goods and it's such a connecting experience but you can't connect when you're blind. So that's why he is a virgin, that and the fact that no one even notices Louis.

Louis' mouth gapes like a fish as he tries to figure out what to say. That he's the biggest virgin ever because having sex scares him? That the farthest he has ever gone was that kiss with Harry that he didn’t even want? That he doesn't even masterbate because nothing turns him on? Nothing interests him. He has only gotten hard about three times in his life. He doesn’t even know anything about sex. Should he tell Harry this, maybe to lift the tension and just get it out there? No, he can't that's way too embarrassing and it's no one else's information beside Louis'.

"I'm so sorry Louis." Harry's voice is muffled like he has his face in his hands. "Like forget I said anything it's none of my business. God this is just embarrassing. I’m such an asshole please forgive me." Louis just turns his face down towards his lap in complete embarrassment of both himself and Harry.  
  
"It's okay." Louis says quietly after a few minutes of Harry spitting out apologizes. "Let's just forget you said anything." Louis lifts his head back up to Harry with a shy smile.  
  
"Yeah. Yeah. Okay so how was school today?" Harry asks and Louis goes on for twenty minutes about how horrible everything is and he's still there just because he wants- needs to become an editor. That’s all he has going for him.  
  
They spend the rest of the date laughing and joking. The awkward sex question long gone from Louis' mind until he lies in bed that night and wonders if he can even get hard let alone have sex and when he tries to think about arousing things, nothing happens. Maybe Louis can’t get hard or maybe he just hasn’t found something that arouses him correctly.

Louis sighs and falls asleep with the fact that he’s so fucking abnormal.  
  
*  
  
Harry picked Louis up from work and they are walking, arm and arm, back to Louis' home.  
  
"So did I prove it to you?" Harry asks as they turn a corner.  
  
"Prove what?" Louis asks as a car zooms by them, the smell of a freshly filled gasoline tank filling up his nose.   
  
"That I want you." Harry says and Louis freezes, his feet glue themselves to the sidewalk and his face formed into complete shock. Harry hasn't left, it's Saturday, and it’s been over a week. Louis and Harry have been dating for over a week.  
  
How could Louis not notice this!? The deal was that Harry had a week to prove Louis that they should be together. Harry was supposed to leaving Louis, a long time ago, way before the week was up. He won, Harry proved him wrong. How?  
  
"Louis!" Harry shouts from in front of him. His big hands on Louis' shoulder, gently shaking him. "Are you okay?"  
  
"You won." Louis says and he can't help the smile spread across his face. "You proved it to me." Louis' smile is big and true. Harry is still here and that's for a reason but there is also always a reason why Louis can/will still lose Harry. He’s a huge blind hassle.  
  
Strong arms are wrapping around Louis' waist and pulling him into embrace full of warmth and cologne. Louis puts his arms around Harry's neck and pulls them even closer together.  
  
"Why are you still here?" Louis whispers in Harry's ear.  
  
"Because we were made for each other." Harry replies and Louis shakes his head against Harry. "I know you don't think so but we are."  
  
And made a little part of Louis, just a little part, is finally starting to believe him.  
  
*  
  
As soon as they walk into Louis house Harry is standing directly in front of Louis with his hands on Louis' cheeks and face only a couple inches away.  
  
"Can I kiss you?" Harry whispers. Louis wants to say yes but the only kiss he ever had was from Harry last week. He's not ready for another.  
  
"No."  
  
Harry let's go of Louis' face and takes a step back. Louis is happy that Harry respected Louis' request. There is an awkward silence for a few moments until Harry clears his throat.  
  
"You know how it promised to make you buffalo chicken dip?" Harry asks and Louis nods his head. "Well I brought all the stuff over so I can make it today." The sound of Harry shaking a bag brings a smile to his face.  
  
"Okay Harry, go make me some food." Louis giggles and walks to his room to get changed.  
  
*  
  
"God Harry this is delicious." Louis says as he stuffs more dip into his mouth. He has been eating it nonstop for the last ten minutes.  
  
"I told you so." Harry laughs and Louis' eyes roll into the back of his head as he eats more. "What's your favorite food?"  
  
Louis shrugs. "Anything that you can cook." He mumbles through his food. "Yours?"

"I have so many can't really choose."  
  
"Makes sense. You've been to so many different countries and seen to so many different cultures and tried so many different things."  
  
"Yeah you know we go on tour soon. I'd love to take you to some of the places then you could tell me what you're favorite is." Harry says as if taking Louis to different countries is no big deal.  
  
"That's okay. I like it here." That was the worst excuse ever, come on Louis you can do better.  
  
"I guess I'm going to have to kidnap you." Harry says and Louis hears the smirk and shakes his head.  
  
"That's so unfair! It’s not like I can run from a kidnapper." Louis whines and Harry laughs at him.  
  
"Life isn't fair." Harry shouts back and Louis laughs but deep inside he knows that life is the most unfairness’ thing ever.  
  
"I want you to meet the boys." Louis tilts his head at Harry in confusion. "I mean you already met them but the want to get to know you. They said to me that if we are together they want to know you before the fans do." Harry chuckles.  
  
Louis gulps. "I don't know Harry I-"  
  
"I told them to come over to my house later to meet you!" Harry blurts out and Louis hears Harry smack his hands over his mouth and he can imagine the wide eyes on Harry's face.  
  
"Harry!" Louis shouts and for once he's really angry. "You can't just do that!" Louis gets out of his chair. "I need to be warned. This isn't something easy for me, Harry. I need to know beforehand I can't just jump into things. Why do you think our first meeting was so awkward? Because I didn't have time to prepare. The boys can’t get to know me by a surprise visit! It’s going to be horrible and awkward and everything else that is a bad adjective. I don't have eyes like you; I don't know what's going on like everyone else. I'm blind and I-" Louis chokes on an angry sob.  
  
He doesn't say anything else his knees collapse and he falls into strong arms. Tears are falling rapidly down his face and he takes his sunglasses and throws them across the room. He doesn't need another reminder that he's blind.  
  
Harry sinks them both to the ground and pulls to his chest. Louis doesn't fight he puts his face into Harry's and lets the violent sobs and tears fall from him. He's crying so hard and he shouldn't be he's just overreacting. To anyone else it’s not a big deal if they go to meet the boys but its Louis and he’s has no friends and he doesn’t know how to make them. He needs to ask Jenny to Google all these questions on how to make friends or seem normal even though he’s not.

He's not crying because he doesn't want to meet the other boys again he's crying because he's blind. He's not normal and no one understands how painful it is. People expect normal things from Louis and he's not, he's just not.  
  
Louis shakes and shivers in Harry's arms. He can't hold anything back and it feels like he's already cried all the tears in his body but somehow more just keeps coming.  
  
 _"When you try your best, but you don't succeed  
When you get what you want, but not what you need  
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep  
Stuck in reverse."_ Harry sings quietly in his ear.  
  
 _"And the tears come streaming down your face  
When you lose something you can't replace  
When you love someone, but it goes to waste  
Could it be worse?"_ Louis sniffs and leans back so he's facing Harry, his eyes opened and tears now silently falling.  
  
 _"Lights will guide you home_  
And ignite your bones  
And I will try to fix you." Harry stops and wipes Louis face with his soft hands. Louis sniffs again and moves his hand until he finds Harry's cheeks. He puts both his hands on Harry's checks and takes a deep breath before leaning closer, forehead to forehead.  
  
"I'm going to kiss you." He sniffs and feels Harry's cheeks move up into a smile. "Guide me through this." Louis leans forward more until he feels Harry's breath. He stops and Harry's hand is on his head and he guides it a little farther.  
  
Their lips connect and melt together perfectly. Harry's lips are soft and comforting against his own. Louis doesn't know if he's doing it right but he feels good. He follows Harry’s leads and for once he thinks he’s doing something right. They pull away breathless and Louis keeps his hands on Harry’s face for a few seconds before letting them fall to his lap.  
  
"Thank you." Louis says. "Thank you so much." He smiles at Harry.  
  
"No. I'm sorry Louis."  
  
"I'm sorry too Harry." Louis says and Harry kisses his cheek sweetly.  
  
"You have nothing to be sorry for love. It's my entire fault."  
  
Louis shakes his head. "No it's my fault, I'm not normal an-"  
  
"You're one hundred percent normal and I don't care how long or how hard, I'm going to get you to believe it."  
  
"Thank you but it's not possible." Louis says and he suddenly wishes he didn't throw his sunglasses.  
  
"I'll make it possible." Harry says and Louis sighs at him. Harry can't make him feel normal, no one can, because he's not and he never will be. But the fact that Harry is trying and wants to fills Louis' stomach with butterflies.  
  
"I love Coldplay." Louis sniffles and wipes his face.  
  
"So do I. They have amazing meaningful songs and they can sing." Harry says and Louis nods his head at him. He closes his eyes because Harry has seen them long enough and for once he wants Harry to stay and try to help him but those disgusting dead useless things on his face aren't going to help keep Harry.  
  
"I'm going to text the boys that we aren't coming and we are going to listen to this new CD I got."  
  
Louis nods at him and gets off of Harry to stand up. Harry calls the boys and Louis can hear them whining that they don't get to meet Louis and it makes Louis feel bad because they cleared their Saturday night for him and he’s not even coming. The taller boy gets Louis' sunglasses for him and they go to Louis' living room.  
  
They sit next to each other and throughout the album Louis grows more and more tired. He leans closer and closer and soon Harry is against the armrest while Louis, dead asleep leans on his chest.  
  
Harry smiles down at Louis ask he brushes the fringe away from the smaller boy’s sunglasses. He knows that Louis already has his heart and it's only been two weeks. He just hopes that he can have Louis’ heart one day.  


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i dont even know why this got as long as it did but i like this chapter even though a part of it kind of feels rushed.
> 
> Let me know what you think :)
> 
> Enjoy :)

Louis' eyes flutter as he snuggles deeper into the hard warmth of his bed. Hard warmth? Louis blinks and opens his eyes to see why his bed is hard but all he sees is blackness. One would think he would remember he was blind but maybe not.   
  
Shaking the thought from his head Louis shuffles around and notices his back half of his body is against something hard and the right side is against someone thing soft. All Louis knows is that this isn't his bed and he always falls asleep in bed. So where the fuck is he?  
  
"Mmh Louis." Louis freezes and suddenly everything is rushing back to him. Harry, the boys, crying, album, oh my god he fell asleep on his couch with Harry. "Oh god Louis you taste so good." Louis stops his struggle of trying to get off the couch. Why does he taste good?  
  
"Harry?" Louis whispers as he sits up and turns around towards Harry.  
  
"Fuck." Harry groans and Louis, confused, reaches his arm out to Harry. His hand his Harry's chest and Harry lets out moan. Louis' eyebrows furrow as he moves his hand up to Harry's shoulder as Harry lets out small moans.  
  
"Harry." Louis shakes him. "Harry wake up."

"Louis?" Harry says groggily. "Oh my god!" He's suddenly awake and he gently pushes Louis away from his as he jumps off the couch. "Oh my-I-."

"Harry what's going on?" Louis looks in the direction of Harry's heavy breathing. Is there someone in his house?  
  
"Oh um nothing. I'm just going to go to the bathroom real quick. I'll be right back." Before Louis can say anything Harry's foot steps are already echoing from down the hall.  
  
What just happened? Louis shakes his head as he stands up and moves his way to the kitchen. He bumps into a couple things as he rubs his eyes. For some reason because he woke up on his couch he seems to have forgotten most of his layout.  
  
Louis yawns as he shuffles his feet across the ice cold tile. He reaches into the third cupboard left of the fridge and grabs out two cups which he pours water into.  
  
"Fuck!" Harry shouts from the bathroom.  
  
"Harry?!" Louis says as he moves out into the hallway. "Are you okay?" Louis moves closer to the bathroom.  
  
"Shit shit shit." Harry whispers but Louis can still hear it as he makes his way through his bedroom.  
  
"Do you need help or something?" Louis says as he stops in the bathroom doorway.  
  
"Uh, um, W-where are your towels? Harry's voice is full of shame and embarrassment and Louis wishes even could see what was happening or at least know.  
  
"Below the sink." He says as he leans against the door frame and listens to Harry shuffle in a hurry. "Why do you need a towel?"  
  
"I, um I cut my finger?"  
  
"Okay?" Louis is so confused right now. "Do you need help?" He asks and pushes of the door frame an takes a step forward.  
  
"No!" Harry shouts and Louis flinches back. "I mean I have it under control, don't worry."  
  
"Why are you acting so weird?"  
  
"I'm not."  
  
"Ever since you woke up you've been acting weird and it's only been about ten minutes." Louis leans back on the door frame with his arms crossed across his chest.  
  
"It’s nothing Louis."  
  
"Did I do something?" Louis asks quietly as he faces his head downwards.  
  
"No, babe you are absolutely perfect." Harry says as he delivers a soft kiss to Louis cheek. Louis blushes and turns his head to his feet, if only Harry's words were true.  
  
"Are you all finished with that towel? I'll put it in the laundry." Louis says.  
  
"No! That's not necessary, I’ll do it myself." Harry's answers. Louis raises an eyebrow at him but gives up on the questions as he guides Harry to his washer.  
  
*  
  
The boys sit at Louis' table and eat the eggs and toast that Harry made for them. Harry makes corny jokes as Louis laughs at them and it's pretty nice.  
  
"You know you talk in your sleep." Louis says as he flings his fork around in his fingers.  
  
"What? I do not." Harry chuckles.  
  
"Yeah you do! You said I tasted good." Louis laughs. "Now tell me how long have you been a cannibal?"  
  
"Oh um yeah..." Harry says nervously.  
  
"Okay?" Louis questions. Why is up with Harry? There is an awkward silence for a few minutes until Harry clears his throat.  
  
"Want to go shopping? Harry asks.  
  
"Where?" Louis says as he eats his last piece of egg.  
  
"Don't care. Oh let's go to Topshop."  
  
"No way that's so expensive."  
  
"We don't have to buy anything. It's just for fun." Harry says and Louis ponders for a few a while.  
  
"Okay."  
  
*  
  
"Yeah it was great. Japan is so amazing, you'd love it." Harry says as they walk arm and arm across London.  
  
"Eh London is good enough for me." Louis says and his excuses still stuck.  
  
"Well what-" Harry starts but is rudely interrupted by a girl screeching.  
  
"Oh my god! You're Harry Styles." She yells and Louis listens to the sound of two pairs of feet running down towards the boys.  
  
"No." Harry whispers and Louis thinks he wasn't supposed to hear that.  
  
"Hi Harry. We don't want to bother you but do you mind if we get a picture." One girl begs and the sound of them pulling out their phones makes Louis realize that he's dating the one and only Harry Styles and with Harry comes fame and with fame comes fans.  
  
"Of course girls." Harry says and they might think he's acting happy and he doesn't mind but Louis can hear the annoyance in his voice. The girls squeal and Louis wishes he was deaf rather than blind so he didn't half to listen to the girls.  Louis mentally chuckles to himself, blind jokes are only cool if you're blind.

"Here can you take our picture?" Louis shuts his eyes under his sunglasses. Of course they'd ask this. He feels the presents of their phones near him and their eyes on him.  
  
"Let's take a selfie." And the girls squeal again. Harry saved Louis' ass and he can't thank he enough for it. Harry leans away from Louis but he moves his arm so that only the tips of his fingers are touching Louis' arm. Louis listens to the girls and Harry taking pictures and he just stands there and smiles because Harry won't let him go.  
  
"Who's you're friend Harry?" One of the girls asks.  
  
"This is the greatest person you will ever meet." Harry says as he moves his and Louis' arm back to their original position. "We need to get going now. Good bye girls." Harry leads them away from the squealing girls.  
  
"That was weird." Louis said whenever he no longer hears the girls annoying screams.  
  
"I'm sorry about that. Sometimes I think it's safe to go out because then they won't want to bother me but I guess not."  
  
"No it's fine." Louis says. "Did they know I was blind?" He asks quietly.  
  
"I don't think so because they expected you to take the pictures." Harry giggles and Louis tilts his head down.  
  
"Well they knew I wasn't normal so I guess that's the same thing." Louis says under his breath and of course Harry would hear it.  
  
"Hey." Harry moves quickly and puts both his hands on Louis' shoulders as he stands in front of him. "You are normal, you're perfect." Harry says and Louis just shakes his head at him. Harry pulls Louis in for a quick hug and soon they are back walking.  
  
Harry opens the door of Topman and the two boys walk in and Louis is hit with a horrible smell, like bad perfume or whatever the fuck it is. They walk around, Harry admiring the designs and Louis touching everything and anything he can. He might knock a few things over without knowing but Harry just smiles as he picks it up quietly.  
  
"What type of fabric is this babe?" Harry says as he hands Louis a shirt.  
  
"Cashmere." Louis says as he rubs his fingers together on the shirt feeling the fabric.  
  
"I don't understand how you know all this? Maybe you should change your major to fabrics." Harry chuckles as he takes the shirt back from Louis to put it back where he found it.  
  
"If only if only." Harry goes to grab another one when his phone starts ringing. Louis steps closer to Harry as he answers the phone.  
  
"Hello? Topman with Louis. Are you serious? Okay okay. Thank you." Harry hangs up the phone and Louis listens to his panicked breathing. "We need to go." Harry says as he starts walking super-fast pulling Louis along quickly. They ignore the goodbye from the worker and rush out of the store.  
  
Once they are in the cold Harry stops them for a few minutes.  
  
"Harry!" Multiple voices shout from right down the street. Louis panics as Harry removes his arm from Louis' and takes Louis' hand instead.  
  
"Harry what's going on?" Louis asks nervously. He's confused and scared, he has no idea what's happening. People are yelling for Harry and it's terrifying. Harry pulls them left and they run through the steers of London. "Harry!" Louis says, horrified, after about ten minutes of running and the yells for Harry not as close as before. "Harry please answer me!" Louis begs and he feels the tears fill up and slip out of his eyes. He's scared he's so scared right now because the yells for Harry aren't stopping anytime soon and Louis is lost in his thoughts of what could be happening.  
  
They turn another corner and Harry is dragging Louis up steps. Oh how he hates those. Louis tried to hold back the tears as Harry pulls him inside a warm building and up more stairs. They stop as he listens to Harry messing with a lock or something. His minds is full of too much terror to think straight.  
  
"Get in." Harry says and he pushes Louis forward. Louis stumbles but catches himself. His breathing is uneven and his tears are now flowing down his face. Where is he? Harry won't answer any of his questions. He wants to go home. He wants his bed. Louis sinks to the ground and curls his knees to his chest as he wraps his arms around his legs and sobs into the gap between his legs and chest.  
  
"Harry?" A girls voice fills Louis' ears. "What are you doing home I thought you were out with Louis?" She asks and Louis can hear her footsteps moving closer and closer to him. Louis hold himself tighter, scared of what is going to come.   
  
He could be anywhere. Harry could have this whole plan to kidnap him and torture, rape, kill or all three. But Harry is too nice to do that, right? Then again why isn't he answering any questions? What is going on? Why does he half to be blind!  
  
"Louis!" Harry says and suddenly there is someone sitting in front of him and strong arms around him. The smell of Harry's cologne hits Louis' nostrils and he squeezes his eyes shut. "What's wrong baby? Tell me what's wrong." Harry whispers into his ears. Louis shakes his head at him. “Everything is going to be okay, I promise.” Harry strokes Louis’ back gently. “Are you okay?”  
  
"S-scared." Louis stutters out.  
  
"Why babe?" Harry gently lifts up Louis' face and he brushes the hair back.  
  
"I-I didn't know what was happening a-and when I asked you, you didn't answer. Who was yelling your name? Why weren’t you answering my questions?" Louis chokes out and wipes his face. He really needs to stop crying especially in front of Harry.  
  
"Oh Lou, I'm so sorry. I was scared for you. I didn't want anyone hurting you. You see that phone call was from one of my friends and he told me that those two girls that I took pictures with put our location online and it was a matter of minutes before the paps would have surrounded us they were the ones yelling my name and I couldn't-will never let you get near the paps. That's why we had to run and I was so determined for them not to get to you that I didn’t listen to you. I’m sorry." Harry explains and Louis smiles because his _boyfriend_ is perfect.  
  
Harry wipes away the last of Louis' tears and kisses his cheek gently. Harry leans forward until they are forehead to forehead.  
  
"Are you still scared?" Harry asks.  
  
"A little but not much because you are here."

"Never be scared when I'm around because no matter what I'll protective you." Harry kisses Louis' check again and Louis blushes. "You're cute when you blush." Harry whispers and Louis wants to remind Harry that he's not normal and abnormal people can't be cute but before he can someone is clearing their throat.  
  
"Listen I'd hate to be a downer but what are you doing here?" That girly voice asks. Louis turns his head in her direction as he wipes his face.  
  
"I'd hate to burst your bubble Gem but this is my flat." Harry says and he takes Louis' hands and pulls them both up to their feet.  
  
"Still doesn't answer my question."  
  
"We were being chased by the paps and this was a million times closer than Louis' flat." Harry wraps his arm around Louis' waist and pulls him close. Louis giggles because Harry's hand on his hip tickles him. "Anyways Louis this _girl_ is my sister Gemma, Gemma this Louis."  
  
"Great to finally meet you Louis. Harry never shuts up about you." Louis smiles as he nods at her. He wants to get out of here right now.  
  
"We'll be in my room." Harry says and Louis breaths out a sigh because Harry just saved him from awkwardness with Gemma. They walk to Harry's room and once they're inside Harry releases Louis and closes the door. Louis stands their quietly with his face towards the ground. "Come here." Harry says and he grabs Louis hand and leads him over to the bed. Louis sits awkwardly on it in a pretzel.  
  
"So I'm in Harry Styles room." Louis says quietly. "This is so strange." He chuckles to himself.  
  
"Not really." Harry laughs.  
  
"To you it's not but I'm in Harry Freaking Styles room!" Louis squeals and after he realizes how embarrassing that was he clamps his hand over his mouth.  
  
"Lou!" Harry laughs from beside him where he is laying on the bed.  
  
"Sorry." He says from behind his hands.  
  
"Don't apologize." Harry says. "Why are you sitting like that? Lay down with me." Harry whines out and Louis shakes his head at him.  
  
"M'fine up here."

"Louis!" Harry whines out and his big Harry are suddenly on Louis' sides trying to yank him down. Louis giggles because Harry's hands are tickling him. "Oh are you ticklish?" Louis can here the mischief in Harry's voice.  
  
"No not at al-" Louis is cut off by Harry's fingers digging into his sides. Louis lets out a road of laughter as Harry continues to tickle him. "S-s-stop!" He laughs and Harry hits a certain spot and Louis is falling deep into the bed as more laughter rolls out of him.  
  
"Never!" Harry shouts back and he straddles Louis' waist and continues to tickle him.  
  
"P-please!" Louis chokes out. Finally Harry stops and Louis is breathing heavily. Louis tries to catch his breath but Harry is straddling him and this is so different to him.  
  
"You're so ticklish. I don't think you realize that I'm going to use that against you almost all the time." Harry says and Louis feels him lean down closer to Louis. "You're laugh is beautiful by the way." He's so close now, Louis can feel his breath.  
  
"I think it sounds like a dying animal." Louis gulps because Harry is super close now and honesty Louis wouldn't mind if they kisses right now.  
  
"If a dying animal sounds like beauty then yes your laugh sounds like a dying animal." Louis feels like he stops breathing because Harry's nose is touching him. "Can I kiss you?" Harry asks cautiously and Louis, after a few moments, nods his head at him. Five seconds past before Harry's lips finally touch his. Harry kisses him and Louis follows his movements doing everything that he hopes his right. When Harry licks his bottom lip Louis pulls back.  
  
"Why are you licking me?" He asks quietly internally shaking because he's so confused.  
  
"I, um well when I lick your lip it's like me asking you to...make out?" Harry replies slowly.  
  
"Aren't we already making out?"  
  
"No babe." Harry chuckles. "We are just kissing and making out is when we use are tongues."  
  
"So you use your tongue to ask if we can use our tongues?" Louis question because he's so confused right now.  
  
"Yeah babe."

"I don't know it sounds...slimy." Louis feels horrible because he's turning Harry down.  
  
"It is. We can do it some other time though." Harry says and Louis can hear his smile. Honestly why is this boy so sweet to him.  
  
"Thank yo-" Louis stops because just told he's Harry that he is a pure and total virgin without actually saying it. "Oh my god." Louis needs to go. He pushes Harry off his and scoots his way to the edge of the bed.  
  
"Where are you going?" Harry asks once Louis' feet hit the carpeted floor of Harry's room.  
  
"I-I need to go." Louis turns his body around trying to think of how to get out the room. He didn't examine it he doesn't know what's in here anything could be on the floor or in his path. He doesn't remember which way he came in and oh god this is not safe for him. He has to get out of here before Harry sees that Louis a loser that doesn't know anything about anything.  
  
"Hey babe." Harry's arms are circling around him from behind. "Don't leave." He places his chin on the top of Louis' head.  
  
"I have to." Louis whispers as he struggles against Harry's arms.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because I'm a loser" Louis says and Harry moves them over to the end of the bed and sits them down.  
  
"Why do you think that?" Harry asks and Louis shrugs at him. This is so embarrassing, Harry isn't supposed to know this hell Louis shouldn't even know it even though it's about himself.  
  
"Because I don't know how to kiss or make out." Louis whispers and he shuts his eyes under his glasses as he waits for Harry to laugh at him and call him names because he's a loser.  
  
"So? There is nothing wrong with that."  
  
"Oh stop lying Harry, what 21 year old do you know that doesn't know who to kiss." Louis spits out. Harry knows one of his biggest secrets and that really pisses Louis off because that's only supposed to be his information. Who cares if they're dating its Louis' virginity and no one is supposed to know. "Exactly." Louis says after Harry doesn't reply for a couple of moments and stand up again.  
  
"No it just shows how you are saving yourself for someone special." Harry finally says.  
  
"Saving myself for someone special!" Louis shouts. "Is that what you think?! No I'm not saving myself it's more like that fact that no one wants to kiss the blind guy because all anyone can give me is some unwanted sympathy." Louis spits out.  
  
"I want to kiss the blind guy." Harry says and Louis closes his eyes as he falls back onto Harry's bed. "I also want to hold his hand. I want to lay next to him all day and all night. I want to listen to music with him and make him food and fall asleep of the couch with him.” Harry chuckles. “When he gets cold I want to hold him close and steal some kisses from him by the fireplace. I want to let him wear my sweaters because he'd look so good in them and then give him kisses because he's wearing my clothes and I just can't resist. Then on hot days I want to take him out and watch his body get even more golden and then we'll kiss until the sun goes down. I also never once have or will show him sympathy because why would I when this blind guy is the gorgeous person alive."  
  
Louis sighs at Harry because Louis really wants that to happen; all of it, but it's only a matter of mere weeks before Harry leaves Louis. He'll get tired of the blindness the constant hassle, the guiding him everywhere, having to watch Louis like a dog, everyone does even Louis is tired of himself. Too bad he can't run away from himself.  
  
"By the way, I think you not knowing something is cute so don't be ashamed or embarrassed about it." Harry says as he falls back on the bed next to Louis.  
  
"It's so embarrassing."  
  
"Louis-"  
  
"Just promise me you won't tell anyone." Louis says and it's not a big deal but if more than just the two know about Louis' loser status then he'd be so paranoid about it.  
  
"I promise."  
  
"Thank you." Louis lets a small smile slip onto his lips.  
  
"You're welcome." Harry says and Louis smiles brighter. "Anyways." Harry starts and then he is back on Louis tickling him until Louis screams out loudly for Harry to stop and Gemma is rushing in yelling at them to keep it down because her favorite show is on and she can't hear it over their "weird lovemaking techniques." Louis blushes for about twenty minutes after that.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said this would be up yesterday but I went to the mall and when I got home I had no inspiration to finish the chapter.
> 
> Also I REALLY want to hear all your opinion on this fic! So please leave a comment, ask.fm, twitter, tumblr (links in end notes)
> 
> Enjoy :)

A week passes and Louis and Harry are going strong. No more cries or yells just laughs and small kisses, nothing more nothing less. Overall it's perfect. Yeah Louis knows he's running out of time until Harry leaves him but for now he's going to enjoy what he has. And what he has is a stupid idea but he's been preparing for this so he has too.  
  
"Harry?" Louis asks from his seat at his table while Harry makes him food.  
  
"Yeah, Lou." Harry must be eating something because his voice is muffled.  
  
"I want to meet the boys." Louis whispers quietly, he closes his eyes under his sunglasses as he waits for Harry to say something.  
  
"Really?" Harry asks as he starts walking towards Louis.  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Oh this is fantastic! The boys are going to be thrilled." Harry smiles as Louis listens to him pull out his phone as starts typing on it.  
  
"Harry wait." The sounds of the keyboard stop. "We need to do this my way, I've been preparing myself and I think it'd be great if you...let me do it my way." Louis says with his eyes squeezed tightly shut. This is a perfect opportunity for Harry to go. He can just throw a fit and say Louis' to controlling and leave him.  
  
"Okay, what do you need?" Harry says and Louis' eyes open because he's so understanding. He's way too good for Louis.  
  
"They need to come here tomorrow night at 5:30. I'm going to order some pizza and we'll just talk and maybe I'll put in a movie if they want." Louis has never sounded more controlling, honestly it's embarrassing.  
  
"But you hate movies."  
  
"Yeah but you guys don't. So, um do you think you could text them all that for me?" Louis asks and pouts his lip at Harry.  
  
"Of course." Louis listens to Harry getting out his phone and typing on it. "I could never resist your pout."  
  
"Hey I'm not pouting!" Louis lies.  
  
"Sure you aren't." Harry's phone goes off and Louis waits nervously. They could turn him down so easily or maybe they won't be able to come because he asked on shut short notice. Ugh. "They said that they'll be here." Louis lets out a breath that he didn't even know he was holding in.  
  
"Oh my god!" Louis shouts and stands up from the table. "I need to clean!" He starts moving faster than normal around the kitchen wiping things with a towel he grabbed out of the cupboard. He's whispering about how this house is a mess and it should be because he's blind but it will _never_ be messy for the boys from One Direction.  
  
"Lou?" Harry asks when Louis gets on his knees and starts scrubbing the bottom cupboards. "Louis this house is cleaner than clean!" Harry says loudly to gather Louis' attention, which he does. "Even if it was mess the boys wouldn't care."  
  
Louis shakes his head at him. "They aren't just any boys they are boys from One Direction."  
  
"I'm from One Direction." Harry says with fake hurt. Louis throws him a look. He can't get shit past Louis.  
  
"Yeah but now all the boys are going to be here. It's exciting yet terrifying at the same time." Louis squeals.  
  
"You're so cute." Harry says and wraps his arms around Louis' waist, locking his fingers together at the top of Louis' pants and pulls him close.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, yeah you say it all the time. I really need to clean so if you-" Louis says distracted by the mess that is lurking about. He stops and motions that Harry needs to let go of him but Harry only pulls him tighter.  
  
"You didn't even eat my new dish that I learned." Harry say as he pulls Louis closer, somehow, so they are chest to chest and he takes Louis' arms and wraps them around his slim torso and sets his chin of Louis' head.  
  
Louis loves this position more than anything and Harry keeps doing it more and more. It makes Louis feel protected like Harry will save him from both his external and internal problems and god knows there are a lot. But most important about this situation is that it makes Louis feel wanted. Harry puts them here every time and that means that Harry wants them to be like this. The best part is that Harry will do it in public and in privacy which means that he wants people to see but he also wants it to be just him and Louis. It's just so intimate that Louis can't help but love everything about it.  
  
"Okay. What'd you make me?" Louis asks and Harry jumps away from Louis with excitement.  
  
"Sit. Sit." He guides Louis over to where he was sitting before; Harry refers to it as the seat of perfection because Louis and only Louis sits there. But honesty it's just because it's the closest to the door, easy escape for the blind freak called Louis. "This is shrimp scampi." Harry places a delicious smelling plate in front of Louis. It smells so good, if only he could see it. "Eat it!"  
  
Louis chuckles as he takes the fork Harry gave him. The thing if Louis doesn't know if it's a solid or noodles or something different so he stabs down. His fork scrapes the bottom of the plate and it hisses back at him. Louis sighs in frustration and embarrassment because Harry is standing right there.  
  
"Noodles babe." Harry says softly and Louis closes his eyes as he tries to hold back the tears, this is so embarrassing. Usually Harry cooks him food that he already knows so this isn’t a usual problem.  
  
Louis puts his fork to his plate and twirls. Once he takes the first bite all embarrassment is forgotten because it's so good.  
  
"God Harry." Louis moans around his fork. "This is so good. I love it." He keeps eating without even breathing because it's so good. He's way into the food to notice Harry sit down or the fact that he should be cleaning.  
  
"Thanks babe." Harry says and Louis blushes as he takes another bite.  
  
*  
  
Today is the day Louis is meeting the boys and honestly it's going to be horrible. Every bone in his body knows that something- everything is going to go wrong.  
  
Harry didn't leave until late last night which means Louis didn’t get to clean until after he left so he was up all night trying the clean the pigsty that he calls home. God he thought he was prepared for this but boy was he wrong.  
  
It's three and they boys are going to be here in a little over two hours. Harry was supposed to be here already and since he isn't Louis decides that he should take a shower because he can't smell for the boys.  
  
Louis washes his hair and hums to himself when he hears footsteps in the bathroom. Louis stops everything and listens closer to make sure he's not just imagining it. Two more steps.  
  
"Lou." It's only Harry. Louis relaxes a little bit because right now he's naked and Harry's standing just on the other side of the shower curtain. "Sorry I'm late. I had to do some...stuff." Harry trails off. "Anyways what do you want me to do?" Harry asks and Louis feels so awkward right now, he's _naked_ and standing not even a foot away from the famous Harry Styles.  
  
"Do you think you can sweep the floors for me? Please." Louis asks and he can help but turn his body away from Harry so that if the curtain somehow magically falls all Harry would only get to see his ass (which is the only thing Louis likes about himself).  
  
"Great! I'll go find the broom." Louis listens to Harry's footsteps as he walks away. Louis stands with his hands still in his shampooed hair for five minutes before finishing his shower quickly.  
  
He hops out and grabs the towel that he set on the toilet seat before his shower and wipes his body and hair down before wrapping the towel around his waist and walking into his bedroom.  
  
Louis hums to himself as he pulls out the outfit that he's decided to wear, black skin tight jeans and the silk shirt Harry bought him. He lays them out on his bed and grabs a pair of boxers. He takes off his towel and slips into them, and then he reaches for his pants.  
  
"Louis I ne-." Harry walks into his bedroom. Louis has no idea what to do. No one has seen him this naked since he first got potty trained. He yanks the pants off the bed and holds them at his chest, letting them cover his upper body and thighs. "I-I-I-I-" Harry stutters out and Louis squeezes his eyes shut; now noticing that he didn't have his sunglasses. Which meant Harry saw not only his ugly body but his disgusting eyes and both at the same time, honestly it will be a miracle if Harry and Louis last any longer than ten minutes.  
  
Louis sighs and sits on his bed. He grabs the blankets and pulls them around him so all Harry can see is his head and his feet, which aren't even touching the ground because he's so annoyingly short.  
  
Two minutes pass before someone says something.  
  
"Maybe you should invest in those doors you hate so much." Harry jokes and laughs dryly and cuts himself off when all Louis does is look down at his joke. "I'm sorry I walked in on you. I thought that you were dressed." Harry pauses as he takes a couple steps forward towards Louis, who has a tiny smile on because Harry isn't walking and talking like he used too. "I know you must hate this-me right now but I'm truly sorry."  
  
"No I'm sorry Harry." Louis says as he looks up at Harry. "I didn't mean for it to end this way."  
  
"Same but- wait what?"  
  
"Just break up with me now and get it over with." Louis says and suddenly Harry's soft big hands are trapping his.  
  
"Why would you ever, _ever_ , think I'd break up with you?" Harry's voice is full of concern and worry. Louis thinks of millions of reasons why but that's not what this situation is about.  
  
"Because my body is disgusting and my eyes are even worse and you saw they both, at the same time. I’m just an ugly hassle.” There finally Louis told him because he knows that it’s going to end now.

"So? Your eyes are something I value on you so much and I know you hate them but I adore everything about you, your eyes included. They're just absolutely fantastic. And your body, god Lou doesn't get me started on your body because I'll be coming in my pants before you can count to three." Maybe Harry is a good actor because Louis couldn't detect one lie. Louis also isn't completely sure what coming means but he thinks it's something sexual or it's just a weird way to give a compliment. Louis makes a mental note to ask him that.  
  
"Why are you so good to me?" Louis asks quietly. Harry takes his top hand off of Louis'. His fingers gently touch Louis' cheek bones and trail up to his hair on his forehead; he pushes back the wet hair away from his face.  
  
"Because you are perfect and you deserve everything that is perfect and I'll spend the rest of my life trying to get you to believe it." Harry's not lying and Louis really hates himself for knowing that but it makes him think that maybe, just maybe, Harry does semi-like him and that he won't leave him.  
  
So for once in Louis' life he isn't going to turn down the compliment and instead he says a simple: "Thank you." And Louis not might be able to see if Harry's smiling but he can sense it and Louis is smiling right back at him.  
  
"You're welcome." Harry's breath gets closer and Louis knows he wants a kiss and so Louis nods at him. At first Louis can barely feel Harry's lips against his own because it's so gently.  Harry moves their lips oh so slowly and it's so sweet and so nice but now Louis is craving more. The kiss is over way too soon for Louis' liking. "I just realized that I came in here to ask where the broom was." Harry chuckles.  
  
"Oh it's in the closet by the front door." Louis says with a small smile.  
  
"Thanks babe." Harry gets of the bed. "Get dressed. Oh and we can finish that kiss later." Harry kisses Louis' check and walks out of the room. When Louis is sure he's gone he stands up and gets dressed for later.  
  
*  
  
"They're going to be here any minute." Louis bounces on the bottom of his feet as he grips Harry's hand with worry.  
  
"Yup and everything's ready and clean." Harry states.  
  
"When did the pizza say they would be here?" Louis bounces higher now as he waits in anticipation. They two boys are waiting right inside Louis' kitchen door so that when someone knocks Louis won't look to desperate because it will take longer to get to the door than if he was waiting right next to the front door like he wanted too.  
  
"Around six, six thirty."  
  
"Good." Louis smiles because everything is going just how he planned. "Thank you for helping me so much Harry."  
  
"Anything for my perfect boyfriend." Harry says and, again, Louis doesn't fight back he just giggles. Harry moves closer to Louis and kisses him quickly making Louis blush.  
  
A loud knock from the front door has Louis' nervous running throughout him.  
  
"I don't think I can do this." He says as they knock again.  
  
"Come on babe it's going to be great and I'll be right next to you the whole time." Harry squeezes Louis' hand.  
  
"Okay." Louis breaths out. "Okay let's go." He doesn't make any sign of moving but Harry starts to gently pull him towards the door.  
  
They make it too the door and Louis takes a deep breath before reaching out finding the handle and turning it.  
  
"Louis! So great to see you again." Niall shouts and gently pats Louis on the back.  
  
"Hi Louis, nice to see you again. Tonight's going to be great and don't worry you're going to fit with us perfectly. I mean I already know everything about you thanks to Harry, who never shuts up about and you especially at night, like I don't even live with the guy but I can still hear him-"  
  
"Liam!" Harry squeaks out, his voice high and embarrassed. Louis laughs at Harry's voice not Liam's story because he doesn't even know when it was going. Why is Harry talking about him at night?  
  
"What? I'm just trying to break the ice." Liam says and walks away towards Niall.  
  
"Hey Lou, great to meet you." Zayn says and he takes a step forward and whispers in Louis' ear. "He really likes you; he told me that you're the one." He pulls away and Louis doesn't even know if he should believe him, the second parts a lie, he's no one’s one but maybe the first part is true. Harry really likes him and well he really likes Harry too.  
  
"Thanks." Louis says quietly to Zayn. "Do you guys want to go sit in the living room?" He asks and all the boys reply yes so Louis, still holding Harry's hand, leads them to the living room. They all sit down Louis, Harry and Zayn on the couch and Liam and Niall on the two small chairs Louis borrowed from Harry's house.  
  
"I love your house man." Niall says. "It's so clean." Louis nudges Harry because he was right they would care if it was clean.  
  
"Much cleaner than your house will ever be." Zayn says and Louis smiles.  
  
The boys talk and talk until the pizza comes and then they eat and talk some more. Overall everything is going great.  
  
"I'm going to go to the bathroom." Harry let's go of Louis' hand and walks out of the room.  
  
"He really, really likes you Louis." Liam says once Harry's out is ear shot.  
  
"Yeah man, he never stops talking about you." Niall chirps in. "He always comes to the studio talking about how perfect you are."  
  
"How he just wants to hold you forever." Zayn continues.  
  
"How he wants to take you to all the different counties and make you come to all our concerts." Liam says.  
  
"He says he's never been luckier to find someone so perfect." Niall ends. Harry's footsteps are echoing from back down the hall and Louis doesn't even know what to do. Harry likes him; he thinks he's perfect; he wants to spoil him with trips. Yes, Harry has said it to him before but maybe it's because he told his three best friends this too, maybe it's all true. Louis can't help the smile that spreads across his face because he _knows_ that him and Harry just aren't a fling. Now he just needs to act normal so Harry won't leave him because of his blindness.  
  
"Hey babe." Harry whispers as he sits back down and takes Louis' hand in his own. The other boys are talking to each other ignoring them.  
  
"Hi." Louis says and leans his head to Harry's shoulder as he listens to the boys laugh and talk.  
  
They end up talking too long and decide to go home instead of watching the movie. The boys say their goodbyes and all that's left is Harry and Louis.  
  
"That went great." Louis says as they walk back to the couch.  
  
"I told you it would be." Harry falls down on the couch as pulls Louis into his lap. "You look so good tonight." Harry says and kisses Louis' lips. "So good." He grabs the back of Louis' head and pulls them closer. Louis kisses him back with everything he has, happy about everything right now.  
  
Harry moves his hands to Louis' waist and squeezes it gently. Harry licks the bottom of Louis' lip and this time Louis opens his mouth and he feels Harry's smile against his lips. Harry's tongue slips into his mouth and it feels weird, a good weird though. Louis follows Harry's movements and way to soon they are pulling away breathless.  
  
"Wow." Harry breaths out. "How was that babe?" He rubs circles into Louis' hipbones, which doesn't bother Louis' like he thought it would.  
  
"Slimy." He says and they both laugh.  
  
Harry and Louis talk for a little while until Harry decides that it's best for him to go home because Louis has school tomorrow and he can’t become an editor if he doesn’t get some sleep.  
  
"Goodbye love." He gives him one last kiss before walking away.  
  
Louis falls into bed that night with his stomach full of butterflies and when he wakes up Harry is the first thing on his mind and the butterflies are still there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE LEAVE A COMMENT ILY


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dont ask me when the next chapter will be up because i dont know and I have a shitload of homework! So it SHOULD be updated on Saturday SORRY 
> 
> Enjoy :)

There is one more week until December starts and honestly Louis can't wait. Literally he can't wait anymore that he is already putting up his Christmas tree.  
  
He called Lottie and asked her to come help him earlier but she said she was going to the mall with her fiends so he called Harry who didn't answer. Louis isn't going to let that bother him and since he has no one else he’s going to do it himself.  
  
He goes into his closet and drags his Christmas boxes into his living room. He opens the first box and puts his hand in to find out that it's his Christmas tree, which he can't build by himself. He goes to the next box and puts his hand in to find out that it's the lights and small items that he would set around his house, which he also can't do. The last and smallest box is full of the ornaments for the tree.  
  
Louis sighs and throws himself to the ground of course he can't do shit. He's so fucking useless that it's not even funny. How is he expected to do anything if he can't even set up his own Christmas decorations? He failed his editors’ test yesterday and he studied so hard for it. And the worst part is when his professor called him into his office and told him to look for a more suitable major because he won't become an editor with his _situation_. He called it a _situation_ because he’s too heartless to just say that Louis is a blind freak that is going nowhere in life.  
  
Louis doesn't even know he's crying until he finds himself curled into a ball lying on his side in front of the boxes. He doesn't even know what he should do with his life anymore. He has been told before so many times that he can't do anything when he's blind and he's always wanted to prove those people wrong but he never will. Many of his old therapists used to tell him he should get a trained dog or a simple helper he said no because that will just made him feel even more useless than he already is.  
   
Louis has never felt suicidal before but right now he sees no reason to live.  
  
He curls himself more into his ball, if possible, and cries loudly. He doesn't care if the whole apartment building-the whole London can hear because everyone should feel his pain. Even though no matter how much pain he is feeling now nothing will be as horrible as how he become blind.  
  
Thinking about the day just makes Louis shiver. He swore to himself he would never go back to Doncaster and even if his family begs him he won't take one more step into it.  
  
That horrible day killed all his hopes of being normal. It killed all his feelings of possible love or being loved by someone else. It killed his eyes and worst of all it killed him. If he could go back to that day he'd never leave his house he would've stayed in bed sleeping all day. But of course it's way too late now.  
  
"Louis!?" A muffled shout comes from outside his front door. It's Harry, of course it's Harry! Louis sobs louder and Harry starts banging on the door panicked. "Louis babe! Open the door!" Louis shakes his head even though Harry can't see him. "Louis I need you to open the door." Harry says clammier now but Louis can still detect the panic in his voice.  
  
"I-I can't." Louis says and he knows Harry can't hear him but he says it anyways. "I can't so anything!" He shouts. "Everything I do ends badly!" He cries out. He can hear the rain falling outside and when he opens his eyes all he sees is darkness and he's brought back to the horrible day he lost his eyes.  
  
"Louis!?" The cries inside the flat have stopped and Harry panics from the other side of the door. Louis doesn't reply so Harry takes two steps back and throws his body against the door.  
  
"No! No! Please stop!" Louis shouts from the other side and Harry can sense that isn’t towards him.  
  
"Louis!? Are you okay? What's going on babe?" He throws his body against the door again and Louis let out a piercing scream and Harry uses everything he has and breaks open the door. He runs through the broken door into the house and towards Louis' shouts.  
  
"I'm sorry." Louis is sobbing again now and Harry knows that he isn't here that he's not in his right mind.  
  
"Louis." He says softly and gently touched his shoulder.  
  
"Ahh!" Louis shouts and scoots away from Harry as he sits up. "Please, please don't." Louis' eyes are opened wide as can be.  
  
"It's Harry babe, it's just me." He says and moves a little closer to Louis.  
  
"Harry?"  
  
"Yeah babe it's me."  
  
Louis snaps out of it and realizes that he isn't in Doncaster he's in his flat in London with Harry.  
  
"Oh my god." He whispers. He hasn't had a relapse in almost five years. He puts his hands in his hair and pulls at the ends.   
  
"Louis." He snaps his head up, eyes opened wise, towards Harry voice. "Are you okay, Lou?" Harry asks cautiously, Louis listens to Harry move towards him. Harry's soft hands are gently on his own. When Louis doesn't move Harry holds his hands.  
  
"I'm so sorry. You shouldn't have seen that." Louis says panicked. He shuts his eyes Harry doesn't need to see them anymore.  
  
"What happened Lou?" Harry asks quietly as he moves Louis into his lap.  
  
"I haven't had one for three years." Louis whispers quietly as he curls himself into Harry's chest.  
  
"Had what?" Harry asks as he starts to gently rube up and down Louis' side.  
  
"A flashback." Louis says and he knows that he needs to tell Harry now because he won't be able to do it again. "I have PTSD, my old therapist said that's its minor and it should only occur if I put myself in the same position I was in when it happened."  
  
Harry doesn't say anything he just waits for Louis to calm himself down. Harry kisses Louis' forehead and Louis takes one last breath.  
  
"I was seven, not even, when it happened. It was January 3rd and it was the first day back to school and I had this huge crush on this popular boy name Johnny who was ten and I planned to tell him that day. I walked into school and I followed him into the bathroom and that's where I told him I liked him and all he did was run out.  
  
"I avoided him for the rest of the day until school was over. It was the end of the school day and I was waiting for my mum to come pick me. Usually I'd wait outside but it was raining so I was sitting inside. Everyone else already got picked up and I thought I was alone but I wasn't. Johnny came over and sat by me and he said he liked me too and he was sorry he ran out. Then for some reason he led me up to the science room.  
  
"Me being the stupid child I was didn't question when we went in and he locked the door. I asked him why we were here and he only laughed and his other popular friends walked into my view. There were twelve of them; I don't even know how I missed then when I walked in. I blame it on the fact that he was my first crush and I was just so naive and distracted then.  
  
"Then so many things happened at once. He said a lot of hurtful things, things I still don't even know what they mean and it was all because I was gay, all because I said I liked him. They walked towards me until my back was against the wall and that's where they attacked me.  
  
"Punches hit my stomach and back but mostly they aimed for my face so I tried to protect myself by turning around so I was lying on my front and someone grabbed my arms and someone else grabbed my legs. I screamed as loud as I could hoping to attract one if the teachers attentions that were still in the school and nothing no one came. I was on my own.  
  
"Johnny laughed at me and he kicked me in the back of the head, once, twice, fifty times or at least that's what the doctor told me. He played footie so he had a good kick and there was so much blood so freaking much." Louis stops as he swallows down the tears.  
  
"You think they'd stop but no all twelve footie players gave me fifty kicks in the back of my head. I passed out around the fifth person and when I woke up I was blind.  
  
"The doctor told me that those boys severely destroyed my occipital lobe, which controls the vision. He said that it was impossible for me to get my vision back without dangerous expensive surgery but he said I was lucky that I wasn't dead. The doctor said that he never thought I was going to wake up from the coma they put me in. He told me that I should be dead or had some mental disability and that I’m lucky. Lucky is the last thing I would say.  
  
"The worst part is that they only did it because I was gay. I mean what kind of crazy ten year olds do that!" Louis cries out and finally allows the tears to fall from his eyes, he puts his face in Harry's chest and sobs into it, not caring that he's ruining Harry's very expensive cashmere shirt. "And the last thing I ever saw was my own blood." Louis chokes out and Harry pulls him in closer.  
  
It's all out everything. Harry knows his biggest and darkest secret and Louis never planned on telling him ever. The only people that know the truth about it are his mum and dad everyone else knows that he become blind at school and that's it.  
  
"What happened to the boys?" Harry asks softly but Louis can detect anger in his voice.  
  
"They got expelled and some people say they went to jail but others say that's a lie." Louis sobs out.  
  
"I hope, wherever the fuck they are, that they are fucking suffering." Harry grinds through his teeth. "And if they aren't then I'll find them and make them suffer. They deserve pure fucking hell."  
  
Louis smiles a little against Harry's chest because angry Harry is cute.  
  
"Hey now, we can't have the famous popstar hurting people now can we." Louis sniffs and snuggles more into Harry.  
  
"This popstar will do anything to protect his perfect boyfriend." Harry puts his chin on Louis' head and grips him tighter. "I'll never let anyone hurt you ever again." He whispers and Louis smiles against his chest because for some odd reason he believes it.   
  
*  
  
The two sit on the ground for an hour talking and giggling before Harry offers to help him decorate. Louis hands Harry the items from the box and tells him to put it wherever it fits. Then Louis lies on the couch as Harry sets up the Christmas lights around each of his doorways. It might seem stupid because he won't be able to see any of the decorations but that doesn't matter because he knows they're there just like the spirit of Christmas.  
  
"I'm tired." Harry announces after he finishes the lights and walks, quite loudly, back into the living room.  
  
"So am I." Louis says from his spot on the couch. His already half asleep and spread out of the couch.  
  
"You didn't even do anything." Harry says and Louis hums in response. "Let's get you to bed." Harry chuckles and soft hands are under Louis' thighs and back. He's being lifted off of the couch bridle style.  
  
"You're so nice to me Harry." Louis mumbles as Harry starts walking. "How do you do it?"  
  
"Do what?" Harry says.  
  
"Deal with all the crazy fans trying to pull you apart."  
  
"It's not bad until they start yanking on me. One time this girl ripped my favorite shirt and I cried for three hours until Zayn told me buy a new one."  
  
"The perks of being rich number one: you’re crazy fans rips you're shirt and you just buy a new one." Louis laughs at himself; it's not even funny he's just that tired. Harry sets Louis down on the floor in the doorway of his bedroom. Louis walks to his dresser and takes out his pjs he looks at where Harry should be standing hoping he'll get the hint to leave.  
  
"I'll go stand in the hallway." Harry says and Louis listens to the five footsteps Harry takes before he lazy strips out of clothes and slips into his pjs. Louis hears Harry humming a Christmas song and then a thought Louis never had before pops into his head. He drags his feet through his bedroom door and to Harry.  
  
"Do you want to sleepover?" Louis asks so quietly that he barely heard himself.  
  
"What?" Harry questions.  
  
"It's just, um...I've never had a sleepover before and it's late and the roads are all wet and the weather guy said that they should be turning to ice roads soon." Louis looks down at the ground and digs his foot into the floor as he talks. Harry doesn't reply and Louis prays that this isn't weird. "I'm sorry. Just forget it; um I'll see you tomorrow then?"  
  
"Of course it's just-I'd love to sleepover, it saves me time from driving home." Louis can hear the smile in his voice and it makes Louis smile. "I don't have any pjs."  
  
"Oh. Well I might have something that will fit you." They walk into Louis' room and he sits on the bed as Harry looks through his draws.  
  
"This seems big enough." Harry says and before Louis can even stand up to leave and give Harry privacy the sound of zippers and clothes being shed lets Louis know that Harry is almost naked in front of him. He blushes at that and looks at his lap. "Cosy." Harry says after he finishes.  
  
"Great." Louis says and he moves around so he is under the covers on the outside of the bed and he feels the bed dip down as Harry gets in beside him. His bed is only a full which means it's nowhere near big enough for room between them. Louis turns on his side away from Harry and the wall. "Goodnight." He says to Harry. Once he closes his eyes strong arms are around him and pulls him until his back hits Harry's chest. Louis doesn't move or say anything as Harry's arm circles around his stomach and his breath hits the back of his neck.  
  
"Goodnight, love." Harry whispers and soft lips are on his neck for a second and Louis doesn't complain. He's warm and safe against Harry. He could totally get used to this and you know one day he does.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts?


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I found extra time and I wrote this chapter really quick so I'm sorry if it sucks

It’s way too early to be waking up but of course Louis is. Something is touching Louis' neck and it's tickling him. Louis tries to move away from it but an arm is holding him still. An arm?

Louis wakes up fully when he realizes that it's Harry's arm. Harry who, last night, Louis told everything to and asked to sleep over. Yeah that Harry and it doesn't bother him one bit expect for the fact that he needs to pee and he can't move.

Louis doesn't open his eyes because he'll still see black so it's not worth the extra energy to lip his eye lids up. Slowly he turns his body to face Harry. He struggles against Harry's arm that squeezes him tighter the more he moves. Once he's facing Harry he really hopes that they aren't too close for Harry's comfort but then again Harry wanted to spoon him.

"Harry." He whispers and it's not needed but he's going to do it anyways. "Harry." He whispers again and sighs when the only reply he gets is a loud snore. Louis brings his hand to Harry's face and pokes him with his finger. "Harry." He whines when Harry just snores louder. "Harry!" Louis shouts and Harry snorts and grips Louis tighter.

"What!? What's going on? Are you okay, Louis?" Harry panics and Louis giggles at him.

"I need to use the bathroom." Louis says and listens to Harry yawn.

"No." That's all Harry says before he wraps is arms tighter around Louis and snuggles his face into Louis' neck. His curls tickle Louis' face and makes Louis giggle. Harry smiles against Louis' neck and shakes his head to tickle Louis face more.

"St-stop!" Louis laughs out and Harry stops but only to move his head away from Louis neck. Louis smiles at Harry and a soft pair of lips kisses him for a second. Harry sighs and unwraps his arms from around Louis and rolls onto his back next to Louis who is glad he can now pee but sad because now he misses Harry's warmth.

Louis smiles at where Harry is and he gets up to uses the restroom, hoping Harry isn't being creepy and looking in. Louis flushes the toilet and walks back out of the bathroom. The sound of a zipper and clothes being put on make Louis stop in his tracks. Harry is leaving and Louis wanted him to stay so they could cuddle in bed and the Harry will make him breakfast just like all the books he likes to read.

"Sorry babe. The boys texted me and we have an interview in an hour." Harry rushes through his words.

"Oh." Louis says sadly and fiddles with his fingers. "Okay." He sighs.

"Hey, don't worry I'll be back in an hour, two hours tops, to set up the tree." Warm lips kiss Louis cheek quickly. "See you soon babe." Louis only makes it into the hallway when the front door slams shut.

"I guess I'm not getting my cute morning date." Louis sighs and walks to the kitchen to make himself some shity cereal.

*  
Louis is sitting by his window in warm sweatpants and an oversize sweeter listing to the crazy sounds outside. He opens his window an inch and the smell of the cold air hits his nostrils. He remembers the snow the way Louis felt like he was being blinded when the sun hit it. It would be funny if Louis actually got blind that way. It would be easy, simple that way no pain, no horror and the last thing he would see isn't the redness of his blood, no it would be the beautiful white sparkly snow.

Maybe he'll go out soon but he can't go alone because he doesn't know where the park is.

"Why does being blind suck so much?" Louis groans out.

"Why would it suck? You got your awesome boyfriend here to help set up your Christmas tree." Harry says and Louis hears the front door close behind him.

"How did you get in here?" Louis asks as he shuts the window.

"The doors unlocked." Harry's footsteps echo through the room as he walks towards Louis. "Let's do the tree." He says and grabs Louis' hands. Louis smiles at big hands in his and allows Harry to pull up and pull him across the room.

As the boys set up the tree Harry gives Louis little lingering touches when Louis hands Harry the branches. Louis giggles each time as it gives him warm butterflies in his stomach.

*

"How was the interview?" Louis asks as they walk through the streets on London towards a park Harry calms he knows very well.

"Um, it was good. The same old questions. What would you being doing if you weren't in the band? Do you miss your family? Who’s single? What d-"

"What did you say?" Louis' voice is shaky.

"About who’s single?" Louis nods his head. "I said that I was taken, nothing more. All anyone knows is that I'm dating someone." Harry says and Louis nods in understanding.

"Thank you." Louis says after a few moments.

"Of course, babe. I won't tell anyone you don't want me to tell. Also I like to keep you secret because you're too pretty for the rest of the world to see." Louis blushes and turns his head to the ground.

They walk for two more minutes and honestly Louis is freezing cold and he just wants to get into the warmth. Then the two boys stop.

"Are we here?" Louis asks.

"I thought it was right here." Harry drones off. The wind blows and Louis' teeth chatter.

"Maybe we should just go home." He's freezing and the park isn't going to be any warmer.

"Yeah. Sorry, Louis I thought I knew where it was." Harry turns them around and guides them back to Louis'.

"It's okay." He chatters out. "Just get me home as soon as possible." He jokes and smiles for a second before his teeth start to chatter again. The wind is blowing crazy now so Louis moves closer to Harry, if possible.

They are halfway home when everything goes to shit.

"Looky here boys." A deep voice says about ten feet in front of them. Harry stops and Louis stops with him then Harry turns them around.

"We got two fags today." Another one says. Louis looks down at that name. This is not going to end well.

"Not just any fags, Jim." A third voice says now in front of them and Harry stops again. "This is that fag from that shitty gay band."

"Oh yeah! My wife loves you guys." Jim says from behind him and that's when Louis realizes that they are surrounded by the three unknown men.

"What's with the other fag though?" The first voice asks and Louis feels Harry's grips tighten as he pulls them closer. "It's not even sunny why the fuck are you wearing those glasses?" Louis is having trouble keeping track of the conversation because the three men are circling them.

"Listen guys we don't want any trouble." Harry says and then suddenly Louis and Harry are being pulled apart. Louis falls to the ground and his heart quickens as a pair of arms hold him down.

"Yeah and neither do we." The third voice says. "All we want is a good fuck." Louis gulps and he can hear Harry breathing from about a foot away and that's the only thing keeping Louis sane right now.

"Well look elsewhere." Harry spits out and he's standing up and Louis wants to be next to him. He needs him right now. Louis attempts to get up but is only pushed back down by strong arms. Then legs straddle his waist and grimy rough hands pin his arms above his head onto the dirty pavement.

"Hello pretty." Jim whispers in his ears and Louis feels like throwing up. Jim smells like cigarettes and cheap liquor. He wants good smelling cologne and warmth that Harry has.

"No! Get the fuck off him you sick freak! Don't you dare touch him-" Harry screams are muffled and Louis knows someone put their hand over Harry's mouth. Louis eyes go wide because that means the other two guys have Harry. That this is really happening. Louis starts to fight the man off of him, be kicks his feet and tries to fail his arms but the man is too strong. Then his sunglasses are being torn from his face and a loud laugh is echoing through the London air.

"This motherfucker is blind. God this is perfect. You won't even be able to see my face as I fuck you nice and hard." Jim laughs loudly. No no no! This can't be happening no! He's waiting, he's not ready, and he’ll never be ready if this happens. No he's waiting until him and Harry are deeply in love this can't happen now! He's waiting for Harry.

"He might not see you but his famous boyfriend is going to watch as you fuck him so get on it with." The first voice says and Harry's screams are muffled from behinds someone's hand. Louis needs him. He needs Harry right now.

Jim puts his hands on Louis jacket and Louis starts yelling as he continues to fighting back. He's yelling the first thing that comes to his mind and it is Harry’s name, he's yelling for him. Tears are streaming down his face as Jim unbuttons his pants. He releases Louis hands and Louis starts hitting him, over and over again as hard as he can. His tiny fist hit the man in the face and chest.

"Fucking stop you little shit!" Jim yells at him and hard fist is hitting Louis cheek. It only causes more tears and pain to Louis. He wants Harry he wants him so bad and it's worse because he's only a few feet away and he can hear him screaming behind the hand. "Arthur get over here and hold him down. You're getting it harder than ever before you fucking cunt."

"Go. I got this fag." Voice one says and a pair of hands is gripping Louis' arms and pushing them back to the ground. Louis knows what's about to come and no he can't let it happen. He had a huge plan to fall deeply in love with Harry and have deeply in love with him and whenever he learns all the facts to sex he'll give himself up to Harry.

His pants are being pulled down to his thighs, leaving him only in his boxers and he is being flipped around by two pairs of hands. His face hits the hard cement and it only brings more pain to Louis' cheek.

"Harry." He cries out as the man squeezes his bum. No one should touch that it's Louis' only. "Harry." He chokes out.

"The names Jim." The man behind him says and it makes Louis cry for Harry louder.

"Motherfuckers." Harry shouts and the sound of skin hitting skin fills the air with Louis' sobs. Grunts and hits sound from behind Louis. Then the hands holding down his arms are being torn from him and more hitting and grunts occur. Louis doesn't stop sobbing as the guy straddling him is being ripped away from him and more sounds occur. Louis doesn't bother to pull his pants up and just rolls into a ball.

Hands are on his again and Louis cries out. "Harry! Harry please help me!" He sobs out as he hits the man touching him.

"Louis, babe, it's me! I'm right here." Harry says as he pulls up Louis pants and buttons them quickly. He grabs Louis jacket and slips it on him.

"Harry?" Louis says as he turns himself towards Harry's voice he puts his arms out to Harry like how a baby does.

"Yeah babe. It's me." Harry whispers in his ear. Sounds of more grunts happen from around them and the. Those soft warm hands are slipping under him and lifting him up. Louis cries into Harry's chest as the start to walk away quickly.

"Harry." Louis sobs out throughout their quick walk back to Louis'.

"I'm right here. I got you." Harry says as he walks fast away from the scene that just happened. Louis repeats Harry's name the whole way home.

Harry is carrying them into the warmth of a building and Louis knows that they're home. "I need your keys, Louis." He says and Louis digs into his jacket and hands them to Harry. Louis knows that Harry is struggling to unlock the door while holding Louis but he doesn't plan to move from Harry's arms ever again.

They walk through the door and Harry carries Louis over to the couch and sets him down gently.

"Louis. We are home, babe." Harry starts rubbing up and down Louis' arm, reassuring him that he is hear and that he is safe. Louis shakes his head and he isn't sure why. "I'm here babe, we are safe." Harry kisses Louis' forehead. A big soft hand is whipping away Louis' tears.

Louis continues to sob and Harry moves off the couch to sit next him on the ground. Then Louis feels Harry's head of his chest. They stay like that for a few minutes before Harry starts humming, it vibrates inside him and travels throughout his body hitting every organ, vain, cell but mostly Louis heart. It makes him feel just as safe as he did this morning in Harry's arms.

Harry starts rubbing circles in Louis' chest and continues to wipe off his teary face. Finally the tears start dying down and Louis wants-needs a shower. Once he's finally done crying he turns to Harry, with his eyes closed.

"Will you sit in the bathroom while I shower?" He asks timidly. He seems needy but he is, one hundred percent needy right now and what he needs is Harry to be next to him, as close as he can be, until Louis is okay.

"Of course." Louis feels Harry rise from the ground and he listens to his knees pop and Louis made him stay in the position.

"Sorry."

"Don't apologize. I chose to sit like that." Harry grabs Louis' hands, pulls him up and walks them to the bathroom. "I'm sorry Louis. This is my entire fault, I thought we could take a short cut back and I was wrong." Harry sighs as they walk into the bathroom.

"No." Louis shakes his head. "It's not your fault." Louis let's go of Harry's hands and wraps his arms around Harry waist. "Thank you. Thank you so much."

"I told you I'll always protect you."

"I know." Louis whispers and then he remembers that Harry beat those guys up. "Are you hurt?" Louis asks him.

"Am I hurt? Louis are you hurt? You almost got.." Harry drones off but Louis knows what he was going to say. He almost got raped and then it truly hits Louis.

"I almost got raped." He whispers and takes a step away from Harry. Then bile is rising in Louis' throat and he falls to his knees and crawls to the toilet quickly. He is releasing his insides and it's disgusting, just like those horrible men that tried to rape him and take away his virginity.

A comforting hand is rubbing his back and Louis can't even believe that Harry saved him. He saved him from everything. First from the paps, yesterday himself and his then today from those men.

When Louis finally finishes he flushes the toilet and turns to Harry as he wipes his mouth.

"Thank you, Harry. Thank you so much and not just for this for everything. Thank you for coming into my life. Thank you for saving me." Louis puts his hand out to find Harry's cheek and he wants to kiss him but he just threw up. Louis' fingers run over a cut on Harry's face and then Harry's hand is on his cheek and running over a cut Louis didn't even know about.

"We should get this cleaned up." Harry says and Louis nods at him. The two boys gather the necessary items and sit on the tubs edge. It consists of Harry cleaning off Louis' face easily and Louis struggling to fine the cut on Harry's face. But Louis doesn't let it bother him because Harry is humming as the work and it calms Louis.

When they finish Louis gets into the shower and strips his clothes down before throwing them next to where Harry is sitting on the toilet. This time Louis isn't bothered by Harry right on the other side of the curtain because he actually wants Harry to be on this side with him. Not now of course it's too soon in their relationship.

Louis asks Harry to stay the night and of course Harry says yes. The two spoon in bed and Louis has never felt safer in Harry's arms. He might fall asleep with a smile but he has an endless night of nightmares about someone trying to take his virginity while Harry is nowhere to be found.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this chapter happened and i think it moved fast but whatever happens, happens right?
> 
> anyways, leave comments and kudos please
> 
> thank you
> 
> Enjoy :)

Louis rips through Harry's arms and sits straight up in bed. His eyes are opened and he is breathing heavy, covered in sweat. It was only a dream through, right?  
  
"Louis?" Harry asks from behind Louis on the bed. Louis feels the bed move as Harry sits up behind him. Harry scoots up until he is sitting next to Louis and then those comforting soft hands are running gently up and down Louis' back, calming him. "Do you want to talk about it?" It's bad because it's already happened three times that Harry already knows what is going on. Just another one of Louis' boring nightmares.  
  
Louis nods his head and steadies his breath before speaking. "I was back at school but I wasn't a kid I was how I am now, 21, and I was in the science room just like before." Louis takes a deep breath to calm himself. "But I wasn't alone. Those men were in there with me and they attacked me. Then I could see but all I saw was you walking out of the science room leaving me there with them." Louis says. "The funny thing is that my image of you was so wrong and you looked like the devil, red with horns." Louis laughs dryly.  
  
"I would never walk out of that room; I would kill those men again and again if I had to." Harry rests his head on Louis shoulder. "I'll let you know that I'm a curly headed tall man that is paler than pale and the only thing red is my heart that just so happens to be beating for you." Louis turns around and pulls Harry in for a hug.  
  
"You're so nice to me Harry, you deserve the best and I hope one day you'll find it."  
  
"You don't need to hope anymore because I already found it." Harry says and Louis blushes and digs his face into Harry's neck. "It's almost 7:30, babe don't you have school?"  
  
"No, I'm on Christmas break." Louis mumbles into Harry's neck. "Speaking of Christmas, what do you want?" Louis asks as he pulls himself away from Harry.  
  
"I would love to get a pet rat." Harry's voice full of sarcasm and Louis giggles at him.  
  
"I'm serious, Harry. What do you want?"  
  
"I don't know, babe. Get me whatever you want."  Harry says and he moves to the end of the bed and stands up and Louis already misses him. "I have a couple of errands I need to do today." Harry says as Louis listens to him get dressed. Louis wants to go with him and he knows that if he said anything then he would seem extremely clingy but then again Louis needs Harry right now. "Don't just sit there get dressed." Harry says, making Louis tilt his head in confusion. Harry chuckles and he grabs Louis' hands and pull him up. "You're coming too, silly. I'll go wait in the living room take your time." Harry kisses Louis on the cheek and walks out.  
  
So many thoughts circle through Louis' head as he gets dressed. Does Harry just feel bad about yesterday and he wants to make it up to Louis? Maybe he just wants to hang out with Louis. That thought makes Louis smile. Harry did say that his heart beats for Louis. Does that mean Harry loves him? Louis shakes his head at that thought and walks out to Harry.  
  
Harry leads them to his car and they start driving and Harry starts to obnoxiously sing along to the radio, making Louis laugh. After that the only thought on Louis' mind is that he thinks his heart beats for Harry too.  
  
*  
  
"What kind of errands are you doing exactly?" Louis asks after the two have been driving for about twenty minutes.  
  
"Well first I need to go to see Nick at the radio station so he can give me back my Ray-Bans. Then I need to stop at a couple stores and get Christmas presents and from there we keep going." Louis really hopes Harry isn't going to make him meet Nick because he can't do that. He's not ready, at all. He's not ready to meet anyone today.  
  
"I-" Louis starts.  
  
"Don't worry, babe. You can just stay in the car while I run into the building real quick." Harry says and Louis shakes his head violently, Harry can't leave him in a car he needs to be next to Harry someone can get him here.  
  
"I'll come up. Just don't make me say anything." Louis hears Harry hum in respond as the car stops.  
  
"Are you sure, babe?" Harry asks and Louis unbuckles his seatbelt.  
  
"Yeah." I don't want to be left alone Louis thinks to himself.  
  
"Alright let's go." The two boys get out of the car and Harry walks around to link arms with Louis. Harry practically drags Louis into the warm building. He should have waited in the car because he's no nervous right now, his legs are shaky, hands are sweaty and his breathing is not normal.  
  
But he can't wait in the car because what if those men find him and try to finish what they were going to do yesterday, Harry won’t be there this time. Louis might not know anything about sex but he does know that forced sex is rape and he's read how people get scars for life and have so many emotion, physical, mental problems and let's be honest here Louis doesn't need any more problems.  
  
"Are you alright, babe?" Harry asks quietly and Louis only nods his head because he doesn't trust his voice. "Hey Sarah." Harry says making Louis look at the ground so no one has to see his face and notice his internal death right now.  
  
"Hello, Harry." A high pitched voice answers causing Louis to move closer to Harry. "What can I do for you?"  
  
"Nick has my Ray-Bans and I would love to have them back. Do you mind if I go get them?" Harry is so polite as he talks to her.  
  
"Of course, but be careful because he recording right now." She answers and Harry mutters thanks before guiding him and Louis away.  
  
"You alright, Lou?" Harry asks as they step into the elevator. Louis nods his head again. "Louis. We can leave right now, you don't need to do this, my sunglasses can wait."  
  
"No." Louis shakes his head. "I-I'll be f-fine." He stutters out and he feels so lost and confused right now. His body feels miles away from Harry and his mind is jumping around the elevator, escaping from any cracks it finds.  
  
"No you're not." Harry breaks their arms and wraps his arms around Louis' waist pulling him forward. Louis snuggles into the warmth of Harry's chest; he sniffs in the calming scent of Harry's cologne. "I'm right here just breath." Louis nods his head and takes deep breaths.  
  
When the elevator dings Louis is calmer but not perfect. Instead of linking their arms Harry wraps his arm around Louis shoulder and pulls him in close. They walk into a hot room with a loud obnoxious voice yelling throughout it.  
  
"The next song is-oh well well well, you won't believe who just walked into my studio. It's a very handsome Mr. Harry Styles and his cutie that he never shuts up about." Did he just call Louis cutie because he likes that except it makes him feel like a child but hey he's only 21. "Let me see what these two want while you enjoy some Lady Gaga." Louis hears a button being pressed as Harry leads them forward into the room.  
  
"Hey, Nick." Harry says.  
  
"Hello. What can I do for you and cutie?" Nicks nickname for him makes Louis crack a tiny smile.  
  
"I came to get my Ray-Bans back." Harrys says. "And don't call him cutie, he's mine."  
  
"Of course, they are on my desk." Nick says and Harry let's go if Louis and walks away quickly before returning to Louis. "Is he being nice to you cutie?" Nick asks as Harry slips his arms around Louis' waist again. Louis nods in response as his heart quickens and hand become sweatier.  
  
"Shut up Nick. I'm a great boyfriend." Harry says and Louis nods after him because he truly is even though he is Louis' first boyfriend so Louis can’t compare him to anyone but even if Harry wasn’t his first he would still be a great boyfriend.   
  
"I never said you weren't."  
  
"We better go but do you mind taking a picture of us." Harry asks Nick, making Louis tilt his head up to Harry's. "You just look super cute in that blue beanie and I want to remember if forever." He clarifies. Louis nods in understanding, and he isn't upset about the fact he won't be able to see the picture because it's for Harry and if he's happy then Louis' happy.  
  
"Course." Louis listens to the sound of a chair wheeling across the floor. Louis feels Harry stand up a little straighter so Louis does the same. He lifts up his head when he realizes that he doesn’t know where Nick is. He turns to Harry and stands on his tiptoes to reach Harry's ear.  
  
"Where should I look?" He whispers so that Nick can't head him. Harry's head turns to Louis'.  
  
"Just look directly ahead." Harry says as his warm breath hits Louis' ear as the sound of a camera goes off. Louis does just as Harry says and he puts on a smile and it's not a fake one it's real because he's standing the best person ever and Louis has need been happier. The sound of the camera goes off a couple more times.  
  
"All good." Nick says before sitting back down and talking to the radio again. Harry starts to lead them away and Louis turns half his body around to wave goodbye to Nick. He might not have seen it but Louis tried and honestly he's surprised at himself for waving to Nick anyways.  
  
*

"Should I get the snowman or the reindeer?" Harry asks Louis as they stand in a Christmas store in the mall. So far Harry has bought everyone in his family presents while Louis tries not to break things. Louis doesn't mind though, he's having fun.  
  
"Let me see." Louis puts his out and Harry sets the two items in his hand. "The reindeer." Louis answers quickly.  
  
"Good I was going to get that one anyways." Harry laughs and takes them back from Louis and guides them to the resister.  
  
"You're Harry Styles." The cashier says to Harry.  
  
"Yeah, love. Are you a fan?" She does answer but Louis can only guess that she nodded. "Do you want an autograph?" Again no answer. Louis hears the sound of pen on paper and he can only guess that Harry is sighing a paper that she must have handed to him. She starts to ring in their items and Louis guesses the mini Harry Styles freakout is over.  
  
"Can we get food?" Louis asks with a big smile of his face making Harry chuckles.  
  
"Of course, babe." Harry says and once everything is paid for Harry leads them to the food court.  
  
*

"No!" Louis laughs loudly. "My sister threw away my ken doll; it was one the worst day of my life." He giggles.  
  
"Why did you even have a ken doll?" Harry laughs.  
  
"I'm gay, Harry. Of course I'm going to have a doll and ken was a buff guy." Louis giggles and tilts his head down towards they table, letting his fringe fall in front I his eyes. The snap of a camera goes off making Louis look up. "Did you hear that?"  
  
"Hear what?"  
  
"A camera going off."

"Yeah I just took a picture of you real quick." Harry mumbles through his food.  
  
"Oh." Louis looks down again with a blush and a smile.  
  
"You're so cute, Louis."  
  
"Shut up, Harry." Louis' blush worsens.  
  
"Never." Harry says as the snap of a camera goes off again.  
  
*  
  
Harry and Louis stumble back into Louis' house hand and hand. They laugh and make their way over to Louis' sofa. Harry sits down first and grips Louis' waist to full him into his lap.  
  
Their laughter dies down and Louis smiles shyly at the fact he's sitting Harry's lap. Harry's hand finds its way up Louis' side and to his neck. He pulls Louis in and when their breaths hit Louis shuts his eyes ready for what's about to come.  
  
"You're so beautiful." Harry whispers before connecting their lips. Louis sighs into the kiss because he's been dying for this all day. Their lips move in sync together and Louis thinks he's finally getting the hang of this. Harry licks Louis' lips and Louis pulls back to adjust himself so that he is straddling Harry.  
  
Louis leans down to connect their lips again and opens his mouth to Harry. He licks into Harry's mouth and savors the taste of Harry. Harry runs his hands over Louis' back and pulls him closer as Louis puts his hands into Harry's curls.

Their kisses get sloppier and faster. Louis starts to feel a weird feeling in his stomach kind of like butterflies but not the same. His jeans start to feel uncomfortably tight so he shifts on Harry's lap and when his crotch rubs against Harry’s Louis lets out a moan. His eyes widen and he breaks the kiss as he jumps off of Harry and onto the ground. His foot slips on the carpet and he tumbles backward to the ground.  
  
"Louis!" Harry shouts and Louis is breathing heavy as he listens to Harry hurrying over here. "Are you okay, babe?" He asks when he gets to Louis.  
  
"I don't know what's happening to me." Louis whispers to himself. "There is this weird feeling in my stomach and oh god, when I moved in your lap, it felt so good." He rushes out.  
  
"Oh." Harry says quietly. "Well," he clears his throat. "When you get, um, turned on or aroused your, um, penis will get hard." Louis' eyes widen as he listens to what Harry is saying and he is absolutely terrified. "So when you get hard and put friction on it, then it will feel very good." Louis' mind turns as it tries to understand what is happening.  
  
"So, when I was kissing you." Louis starts slowly. "It felt good and so I got hard and my pants felt tight so I tried to move and that's when I got the friction." Louis says.  
  
"Exactly."

"So is this normal?" Louis asks.  
  
"Completely."

"How to you get rid of it?" Louis asks shyly as his face heats up.  
  
"You touch it." Harry coughs awkwardly.  
  
"C-can we go back to what we were doing?" Louis wriggles his fingers together.  
  
"Yeah." Harry breaths out as he grabs Louis' hands and drags them back to the couch. Louis straddles him and Harry pulls Louis in for a kiss. At first it's soft and reassuring and then becomes hot and heated. Louis moves his hands into Harry's air again as Harry moves his hands to Louis' hips. He grips him tightly and pulls Louis' hips down until he rubs against Harry's crotch.  
  
Louis moans out loud and he doesn't feel too weird when Harry moans too. Harry continues to guide Louis hips. Louis pulls away from Harry's lips to catch his breath. He tilts his head back, exposing his neck, which Harry takes full advantage of and starts sucking on Louis' neck.  
  
"Harry, Harry I feel like I'm-" Louis' pants are tight and so uncomfortable. He feels weird and the awkward butterflies in his stomach are burning inside of him begging to get out.  
  
"Let it go, babe." Harry says against Louis' neck. He moves Louis' hips faster as Louis feel Harry moves his lips up to Louis' jaw line sucking and kissing hard. Louis lets out a breathless moan as he closes his eyes and let’s goes, just like Harry said.  
  
"Harry." He moans louder than he ever thought possible as he feels something weird squirt from his cock, and it's one of the best feelings ever. He breaths heavy as Harry moves his hips faster until Harry is moaning out Louis' name too. The taller boy moves them together for a few more moments until they slow down to a stop and are left forehead to forehead as they breathe into each other's mouth.  
  
"You okay?" Harry asks breathless.  
  
"Yeah." Louis nods. "God that was so good." Louis says as he tries to ignore the feeling of his wet, sticky pants.  
  
"Fuck yeah it was. God Louis did not expect that, it was so hot. Your moans, oh god so perfect, so fucking perfect." Harry rambles on and Louis smiles as he moves his head to Harry's shoulder. "Those lovebites I gave you are going to hurt later." Harry chuckles.  
  
"What?" Louis mumbles into Harry's shirt.  
  
"When I was sucking on your neck, that's a lovebite and what we were just doing was called grinding." Harry explains and Louis nods in understanding.  
  
"That was so good." Louis yawns out against Harry's chest.  
  
"No, no falling asleep not in those pants, let's go get changed." Harry wraps his arms around Louis and stands up. Louis clings to him like a koala as they walk to Louis' bathroom. He sets Louis on the toilet seat and Louis listens as he opens the cupboard. "Hear take your pants off and wipe yourself off, I'll put your clothes on the ground in the doorway." Louis does as he's told and walks into his room.  
  
"Come lay down with me." Harry demands from the bed. Louis giggles and slips under the covers with Harry.  
  
"Thanks Harry." He says as Harry pulls him closer. "For everything today and for teaching me how to do...grinding."

"Anytime, babe. I'm here for you." Harry says and Louis chews on his bottom his as the only thought in his head is that he loves Harry but should he say it? "Lou, babe, I want to tell you something.” Harry takes a deep breath and Louis holds in as he waits. “I love you and I've been in love with you the moment we first met."  
  
Louis opens his mouth to reply but he snaps it shut. _Say it Louis! Just say it!_ His mind screams at him. Can he? Should he? Does he even what to? Harry is so nice and perfect to Louis' he deserves everything and Louis is going to keep him from getting it. Then again Harry said he already found best thing, and it's Louis.  
  
Harry has suffered through many breakdowns and even a flashback from Louis. He was given so many chances to leave and yet he's still here. Louis knows that they are moving fast but Harry has already made a perfect home in Louis' heart and Louis hopes he make a home in Harry’s too.  
  
"Do you mean that?" He whispers.  
  
"Of course, I love you, everything about you and I know that we are moving fast but I have never felt this way about anyone before. We connected so well and all I want to do is keep you mine forever. I really love you, Louis. I feel like you took our souls and linked them together and whenever I’m not with you, the only person on my mind is you. I know you think I’m crazy for falling in love this soon but love is different for everyone even though in the end we all go through the same process. First is puppy love. Real love, light right now, happens after when you can put up with things that each other do, good and bad.   
  
"I love you, too." Louis says. "I just wanted to make sure that you really loved me." He smiles and a soft pair of lips kisses his.

“Of course I do. Ill going to love you forever.” He whispers against Louis’ lips.

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.” They fall asleep intertwined and in love.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IM SO SORRY! I HAD A HUGE PRESENTATION AND FINALS THIS WEEK AND THEN I HAD HALF THE CHAPTER DONE AND MY LAPTOP JUST DECIDED TO DELETE IT ALL. I WAS SO PISSED. 
> 
> Again I'm sorry and this chapter is complete shit.
> 
> Try to enjoy it :)

Louis wakes up to Harry gently stroking his check. He blinks his eyes open and wipes the crust away. Harry's is spooning him like before expect this time his hand is under Louis' shirt, lying gently of him stomach. Louis would normally feel really insecure about it but for some reason the hand feels...right, like it belongs there.  
  
Louis rolls onto his side to face Harry and smiles at him with open eyes. If Harry loves him then maybe he won't mind his dull eyes.  
  
"Hi." Louis whispers as Harry moves his hand to Louis' lower back, his fingers barely touching Louis' waistband.  
  
"Hello, love." Harry says and rubs his and Louis' noses together. That's an Eskimo kiss, Louis read about those a couple years ago when he was really into romance novels. The kiss is always cute, even the dots of the brail that form it are cute and it's all because they connect like puzzle pieces. Kind of like Louis and Harry.  
  
Harry kisses Louis' forehead gently and pulls his face away from Louis, but only a little. Louis closes his eyes after that because even though they are in love his eyes are disgusting and those eyes can ruin everything.  
  
"You're breath stinks!" Louis giggles and Harry pulls him closer, if possible. Their legs are tangled with Harry's hand lying on his lower back, the other one gently playing with the little long pieces of hair Louis has. His mum tells him that he really needs a haircut but it's not going to happen.  
  
"So does yours!" Harry chuckles back. "Since we both smell, you won't mind this." Louis doesn't even get to respond because Harry's mouth is on his. They kiss softly, nothing hot like yesterday. Harry rubs his thumb on Louis' back. Harry's lips are so strange, they are thin but yet they are just thick enough and that make no sense but it’s true. Harry pulls Louis' bottom lip with his teeth and god that's hot. Louis can feel those same butterflies so he pulls away.  
  
"Harry?" He asks quietly. The big question that he really wants to ask is lying on the tip of his tongue.  
  
"Yeah babe?"

"Am I still a virgin?" He whispers so quietly that he barely even heard it himself.  
  
"Of course babe." Harry answers kindly as he rubs his thumb slower. Louis nods at him thankful that he's still a virgin and hopefully he'll be that way for a while. Then Louis' mind drifts off and lands in Harry.  
  
"Are you a virgin?" As soon as the words are out of Louis' mouth he just wants the world to explode right now. He squeezes his eyes and pays that he didn't overstep a line with Harry. He wants to know the answer but he doesn't know if he wants Harry to say yes so that Louis knows that Harry understands and knows what he is doing or does he want Harry to say no, where Louis is alone and still an abnormal freak.  
  
Then again what kind of popstar hasn't had sex before? Everyone wants them, they want to be them but they can't so they settle with sex. Louis knows that Harry has dated multiple people, all people Louis cried over because he believed that he would never get the chance to meet or _see_ his idol.  
  
Life's ironic but it's also a bitch.  
  
"No." Harry coughs out. "I lost my virginity when I was 15, pretty young and I regret it so much. It was with some girl that I was dating and she said it would be fun but it wasn't, not one bit." Harry pulls Louis closer (honestly how much space is left between them) Harry's breath hits Louis' face as Harry's hand moves an inch up his back.  
  
"Oh okay." Then Louis brain thinks harder and another horrifying question is leaving his mouth without permission. "How many people have you have sex with?" Louis blurts out and he quickly tries to cover his and stop the words but its way too late now. "Oh my god. Harry, I'm so sorry I didn't mean to just ask stuff like that it's not right-."  
  
"Six." Harry cuts him off. "Oddly enough for the amount of people that want me I only slept with six. I guess you call them my friends with benefits; we use each other for sex more than friendship though. Fuck buddies are just easier than trying to find a one night stand that won't tell the whole world also it helps me knows I'm clean."  
  
"Clean?"  
  
"Yeah, when you have no STDs and shit like that." Harry moves his hand out from underneath Louis' shirts and instead he puts his hand on Louis' checks lightly. Louis nods his head and smiles at Harry.

“Is six a lot of people?”

“No, it’s like average.”   
  
"Thanks for answering my super private questions." Louis giggles out.  
  
"I'll tell you anything you want, babe." Louis feels Harry lean towards him and Louis closes his eyes to meet him half way. Their lips just touch for a second before they pull away.  
  
The boys spend the rest of the day in bed giggling and stealing kisses and honesty it's perfect.  
  
*  
  
It's a week before Christmas and Louis is going to have a mental break down. He has no clue what he's going to get Harry for Christmas, what does he like? What does he want?  
  
"AHHH!" Louis screams into the carpet. He has been lying on his stomach for the past half hour trying to think of what to get for Harry. Maybe he should just go to the gas station across the street and just buy Harry a slushy or candy or something else.  
  
Louis' stomach growls that the thought of candy. He groans because he hasn't eaten all day and he doesn't feel like cooking. He went to work today and played the piano for eight hours straight with no break and his hands are killing him.  
  
"Alright, Alright!" Louis says after his stomach growls again, louder this time. He pushes off the ground and stumbles his way to his door. He walks, very carefully, down the four steps and out his buildings door. He makes it to the sidewalk and stops two steps from the edge. The one problem with the gas station that crossing the street is so dangerous for Louis.  
  
He then remembers that if he's going to make it across the street alive then he's going to need his cane. Louis makes his way back inside and grabs his cane off his kitchen table. Normal people don't use a cane; he thinks and quickly shakes the thought from his mind. He flips it open and starts to make his very quick journey across the street.  
  
A car screeches when he's half way across the street.  
  
"What the fuck?" The driver yells from Louis' right. "Freaks like you should be locked up! How do you expect to find anyone if you can't even walk across the fucking street!" Louis squeezes his eyes to keep the tears from falling.   
  
"Four more steps." Louis mumbles to himself. One. Two. Three. The car screeches away as the man yells how horrible Louis is one last time. Four.  
  
Ten steps. Ten steps is all it takes for Louis to cross the streets. Ten steps is all it takes for him to tear up. And to him that's pathetic but he does have someone, he has Harry.   
  
He wipes his eyes under his sunglasses and makes his way into the store. He slowly walks to where the chip aisle is.  
  
When he makes it he hear the annoying voices of two girls at the end of the aisle as he slides his hand across the shelf looking for chips.  
  
"No way that Harry would do that." One of them says.  
  
"Why not Cara? I would date her if I could, she's hot." The another girl says.  
  
"It doesn't matter, why would he pick her to be with when he can have anyone in the whole world. It's obviously only for publicity." Are they talking about Harry, as in Harry styles? Louis takes a step closer to them and turns to the shelf, trying to make it seem that he's looking at something.  
  
"Maybe he really likes her." Louis reaches out and grabs the first bag he touches off the shelf and looks down at the bag to make it seems like he is reading the label.  
  
"Bullshit. Harry Styles is so gay I bet he has a boyfriend and they hired her for a beard." Cara states and Louis freezes. They are talking about Harry. No way that they could that Harry is gay let alone dating Louis. He breaths deeply. Who is this girl they are talking about? Is Harry cheating on him?  
  
"Whatever believe what you want but Harry is dating Kendall." Harry is cheating on him. Harry is cheating on him and he can get away with it so easily because it's not like Louis talks to anyone. Why would he do this? What would he lie to Louis like that? Aren't they in love? Aren't they happy?  
  
Anger runs through his body and he can't stand it anymore. He drops the bag of chips to the ground as he stumbles out of the store and onto the sidewalk. Yes, for the first time Louis isn't going to cry no he's pissed.  
  
He stomps across the street, his cane stressed out in front of him. He stomps up the small steps and straight into his home. All he wants to do is yell at Harry and hit and a bunch of other things to cause him pain.  
  
"Jenny. Call Harry." Louis growls into his phone as he places it on the kitchen counter and starts to pace in front of it. He feels like steam is escaping through his ears like that scene from Harry Potter. Ugh no not Harry Potter. Screw Harry. Screw everyone with the name Harry but most of all screw Harry Styles.  
  
"Lou! I was just about-" Harry says happily into the phone.  
  
"You are so unbelievable! Not only are you a good singer, you're a damn good actor too. You come into my life and make me feel worth something, you make me feel loved and I turn around for one minute and bam it turns out everything you told me were all lies. You saying you love me is absolutely the most pathetic thing a human being can do! I thought you were a better person. I thought that you actually had feels for me but no. I was wrong. Or maybe I'm not maybe you do have feeling for me but that doesn't matter anymore. We are over done with. I never want to be near or hear from you again. So I hope you have fun with whoever Kendall is and you guys are happy together."  
  
Louis throws his hand down on his phone, roughly ending the call. So many feelings are coursing through his veins. Anger, heartbreak, sadness, betrayal.  
  
"Now what." Louis whispers to himself. He walks over to the couch and lies down. As soon as his head hits the couch he's crying angry tears. He lost Harry, the only man he loved, the man he thought he would be happy forever with, the man that even though Louis won't admit he would consider marrying one day. Being happy with Harry Styles is the dream but the thing with that dream is that Harry is famous and like Cara said he can get anyone in the world. So why would he ever he _think_ about settling with a blind freak like Louis.

Harry might be famous and rich and a sex god but he can’t just do this to people like Louis. Louis is so fragile, his heart is broken but Harry, Harry snapped his heart completely in half. All Louis has is just what he had before and that was terrible. Harry made him become a stronger person but like Ed Sheeran sang “What didn’t kill me, It never made me stronger at all.” Oh Louis really loves Ed Sheeran, he knows how pain fells.

A knock is at his door and Harry is yelling for Louis to open it and he can explain. Louis just ignores him. He sniffs and makes his way to his bedroom and falls under his covers, not bothering to change or brush his teeth.  
  
"Being blind sucks." Louis mumbles as he closes his eyes and it doesn’t make much difference because all he sees is black anyways.

*  
  
Louis wakes up sad. He walks into the shower and cleans himself off. He steps out of the shower sad as the cold air hits his wet body. He dresses for work oh so slowly, not worried about being late because it's only work. Maybe he should get ready because it's all he has just his family, school, work and H-.  
  
"No thinking about him." Louis grabs his keys and opens his front door. He sighs as he takes the first step into the hallway only to trip over something. He falls face first into the dirty hallway floor. "Ugh." He groans and rolls onto his back. Not even twelve hours without Harry and his life already sucks again. Damn he thought about him!  
  
A groan comes from Louis feet and makes his eyes widen. He's fallen over someone!  
  
"Lou?" Harry! He's fallen over Harry.  
  
"Harry?! What are you doing at my doorstep?" He scrambles to his feet.  
  
"I came here last night and you never came to the door nor did you answer any of my calls or texts so I came to wait because you were going to leave at some point." Harry explains and Louis wants to run far away but he also wants to run into Harry’s arms.  
  
"I have to work." Louis says as he makes his ways to the stairs.  
  
"Louis wait!" Harry grabs his arm gently and Louis stops and stands in place, not turning around. "Please just hear me out."  
  
"Harry I have to get to work." Louis still doesn't turn around.  
  
"No you don't. I called your work and told them that you had the stomach flu and couldn't make today." Harry blurts out.  
  
"What!" Louis spins around, his eyes wide under his sunglasses. "Harry you can't just do that!"  
  
"No don't worry babe. They believed it because someone other than you was calling so they really think you're sick." Harry says and Louis just huffs out and crosses his arm.  
  
"Fine." He pouts. "Let's talk." Louis walks past Harry and inside to the living room and sits down with arms still cross.  
  
"I love you." Harry blurts out and Louis huffs but inside he hopes it's true. "Whatever you've hear or whoever told you is wrong. You need to understand the work force I'm in. A boyband that has millions of girls under their spell. So to keep our fans management told me that I couldn't let them know that I like boys and if that happened we would lose the fan base and I would ruin Niall, Liam and Zayn’s career. They are my brothers I can't do that to them so I promised I would stay single but every year around Christmas time management tells me that I need to fake date some girl and that's when Kendall came in. They make me do stupid things that make is seem like were are together but I don't think I've said more than ten words to her." Harry rambles out and takes a deep breath.  
  
"So whatever you think I want you to stop because I love you, I'm not and I will never cheat on you, and I hope you can forgive me and take back that breakup." Louis shakes his head. “Please Lou.” He begs.  
  
"I- Okay." Louis says with a smile. That’s the last time he ever believed what the fans said. Harry loves him and he's just protecting his best friends. He's doing it for everyone else. "You're so selfless. That you can do this for your friends."

"And you." Harry scoots closer to Louis. "So beautiful, so perfect and you're all mine." Harry attaches his lips to Louis. Louis melts into the kiss and screaming internally at the fact that they are back to normal so quickly. Louis used to be more protective of himself but now he has Harry to protect him and he's going to try his best to keep him.  
  
Harry moves closer to Louis gently pushes Louis chest down until Louis is lying flat on the couch. Harry licks Louis' lips ear geeky and Louis opens his mouth slightly. Harry shoves his tongue in making Louis moan into his mouth. Louis starts to feel the same weird feeling happening and he doesn't know if he wants to do this or not.  
  
"Don't fight it." Harry whispers when he pulls away from Louis' mouth to reattach is mouth to Louis' neck instead. He sucks down hard making Louis whine out.  
  
"Harry." He breaths out as he grips Harry's back tightly. His hips grind up involuntary looking for some sort of friction. Harry chuckles against his neck and starts to roll his hips down. At first it's slow but the moans Louis is releases make Harry spread up. Louis is sweating and he knows what's coming. He grips the back of Harry's shirt, his hands bunching up the thin fabric. "Harry." He moans out when Harry bites down on his neck seconds closer to coming.  
  
"Let it go." Harry whisper in his ear and moves to stuck down right below it. Louis moans out Harry's name as he closes his eyes and relaxes his body, releasing into his pants. He loses his grip on Harry shirt as he breaths out, trying to catch his breath. Harry grids down a few more times before he moans out and falls limp on top of Louis.  
  
The two boys lay there, Harry stroking Louis' check as he whispers how much he loves Louis and how good that was. Louis giggles and kisses him gently, feeling very insecure that his kisses might suck.

“I’m sorry.” Louis whispers.

“No don’t be sorry, just next time you hear something don’t believe it.” Harry says into Louis’ ear. With Harry on top of Louis, Louis has never felt safer because Harry is here to protect him, love him and prove all those rumors wrong. “Also I’m sorry.”

“For what?” Louis asks as he scrunches his eyebrows and turns his face towards Harry’s.

“For your neck. You would have gotten fired if you went to work like that.” Harry chuckles.

“What?”

“Love bites, babe, you got love bites everywhere.” Harry pressed his finger down on Louis’ neck making Louis flinch away and emphasizes the bruises on Louis’ neck.

“That hurt.” Louis whines out as he swats Harry’s hand away making him chuckle.

“Sorry babe.” Harry says and Louis huffs and pouts his lips.

“I love you.” Louis whispers.

“I love you more babe but right now we need to get out of these pants.” Harry chuckles and stands up, pulling Louis with him and dragging him away.

*

“What do you want for Christmas?” Louis asks the next day while the walk down the street, arm and arm and Louis wearing a scarf that Harry forced upon him.

“Nothing.”

“Harry.” Louis rolls his eyes at him. “Just tell me.”

“I would love to get a new watch.” Harry says and a light goes off in Louis’ head. He knows what he’s getting Harry and it’s not a watch. 


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if the ending was rushed, my sister dyed my hair and she kept yelling at me to finish whatever i was doing. Anyways, Christmas chapter is next. I love Christmas its the best holiday ever, lights everywhere and you get delicious food desserts and even though you need to spend time with your family its fine because you get presents. 
> 
> Love you all
> 
> Enjoy :)

Louis has been pacing in front of his door for the past half hour trying to think of how he can buy Harry's gift. Lottie is at school and his mum won't drive all the way to London for him so Louis is stuck in his house. He just needs someone that can drive and obviously Harry's out of the picture because the gift is for him.  
  
What if he calls one of the other boys? That's not a bad idea. But he doesn't have any of their numbers, unless...  
  
"Call Harry." Louis says to Jenny, his pacing doesn't slow as the phone rings.  
  
"'Ello?" Harry mumbles into the phone and Louis knows that he's sleeping right now.  
  
"Harry, hi do you happen to have Niall's number?" Louis speaks quickly into the phone.  
  
"Mmh? What? Why do you need Niall's number?"  
  
"I have to ask him something." Louis says and it's not a lie either.  
  
"Okay, I'll tell him to call you. Bye babe." The line goes dead, that was really easy. Louis paces for five minutes until his phone is ringing.  
  
"Hello." He says.  
  
"Louis! My big ass man! What can I do for you!?" Niall shouts into the phone making Louis pull it from his ear.  
  
"Can do you me a favor?" Louis asks shyly as he plays with the hem of his shirt.  
  
"Yeah what do you need.”?  
  
"I-I want to get Harry's Christmas present and I can't drive so I need someone to drive me to the store and I-."  
  
"Course! Are you home?" Niall cut in.  
  
"Uh, yes."

"Great I'll be right there. Bye!" Niall yells into the phone and then it goes off.  
  
"Bye?" Louis says. That was the weirdest conversation ever. Okay not ever but it was pretty weird. Doesn't matter how weird because he is getting a ride from the one and only Niall Horan. Louis shakes his head, the perks of dating a star.  
  
*  
  
"So where do you want to go?" Niall asks as he guides Louis to the car.  
  
"There is this little store on Grave Street." Louis grabs his seatbelt and pulls it across his struggling as he tries to put it in the holder. "Next to the Apple store by the river."

"Why are we going there? That doesn't seem very Harry." Niall says as he starts driving once Louis finally got his seatbelt in.  
  
"Oh trust me. Harry's gift is there." Louis laughs.  
  
"Fine by me." Niall turns on the radio. "I got him a couple of shirts and a bottle of vodka." Niall laughs loudly, sharply turning the wheel. Louis' neck swings to the side and his stomach lurches, Niall is a shitty driver. Let's just hope Louis can make it to the store alive.  
  
*  
  
"I don't want a lot for Christmas  
There is just one thing I need  
I don't care about the presents  
Underneath the Christmas tree." Louis turns up his radio and grabs his broom singing into the broom with Mariah Carey.  
  
"I just want you for my own  
More than you could ever know  
Make my wish come true  
All I want for Christmas is you, yeah." Louis belts into the broom, barley able to her Mariah anymore as he drags the broom across the kitchen to sing the next verse.  
  
"I don't want a lot for Christmas  
There is just one thing I need  
And I don't care about the presents  
Underneath the Christmas tree!" He spins around and shakes his hips as he struts into the front door hallway.  
  
"I don't need to hang my stocking  
There upon the fireplace  
Santa Claus won't make me happy  
With a toy on Christmas Day." He covers the top of the broom with his hand and struts around the broom in a circle shaking his hips.  
  
"I just want you for my own  
More than you could ever know  
Make my wish come true  
All I want for Christmas is you  
You, Baby." He dips his hips down to the ground like all the stripers he read about.  
  
"Oh, I won't ask for much this Christmas  
I won't even wish for snow  
And I'm just gonna keep on waiting  
Underneath the mistletoe." Louis sings loudly as he grabs the broom and drags it behind him. He struts foreword towards the front door before turning around, butt facing the door as he leans forward and smacks his hands against the ground, legs straight, he rolls his body up his hands tracing along ankles, knees, thighs, stomach and shoulders, shaking his butt the whole time. He flings his arms in the air as he jumps around, facing the door and swinging his hips as he belts out the rest of the song.  
  
"All I want for Christmas is you, baby!" He finishes, with the broom pressed against his body so that the top is just by his lips. He's breathless and his chest heaves as he wipes the sweat from his forehead. "What a work out." Louis laughs out and freezes when the sound of clapping echoes through the hallway. Louis turns quickly lifting the broom with him ready to attack whoever is there, even though he'll lose anyways.  
  
"That was seriously one of the hottest things I've seen." Oh it's just Harry. Louis lowers the broom as his face heats up to a boiling point.  
  
"I didn't think anyone was here." Louis drops the broom and fiddles with his fingers.   
  
"Yeah, I knocked and you didn't answer but I heard music and singing so I came in as soon as you were bent over. God Lou that was so hot." Harry says and Louis listens to him walk forward. He stops and puts his finger under Louis' chin and guides it upward. "Where did you learn to dance like that?" Harry's voice is deeper than normal.  
  
"Um, I've always danced like that." Louis mumbles out. Harry puts his arms on Louis' shoulders.  
  
"That was better than a stripper babe."  
  
"Thanks." Louis coughs out, his face is probably worse than Rudolph's nose.  
  
"I-I'm going to go take a nice cold shower." Harry announces and he slips his hands down Louis arm before walking away. Louis nods and turns to where Harry footsteps sound from down the hallway.  
  
"Why cold!?" He yells after Harry.  
  
"I'll tell you about it one day." Harry laughs back and Louis, confused just shrugs and walks over to turn off the radio. Maybe Harry just doesn't like hot showers. Strange.  
  
*

"Harry." Louis says as he puts down his fork and looks up at where Harry is sitting, eating dinner.

"Yeah?" Harry mumbles through his mouth of good.  
  
"I'm going home on tomorrow; I'll be back on Saturday though."  
  
"What?" Harry swallows his food. "But, I'm going to miss your birthday." Harry says sadly and Louis looks down at his food.  
  
"My birthday is not important Harry."  
  
"Not important!" Harry says shocked. "It's so important it's your birthday nothing else is important on your birthday."  
  
"Thanks Harry but it's Christmas Eve and I haven't seen my family in a while." Louis says.  
  
"I understand. I think I can last a week and a half without you." Harry is serious when he says it and Louis knows that he won't last a week without Harry so he'll use his family to distract him instead. "Let's just enjoy these last couple of hours together."  
  
And they do.  
  
*  
  
"You're going to be fine alone?" Harry asks as he rubs up and down Louis' arms gently.  
  
"Harry I can take a train." Louis giggles.  
  
"I know babe, I just want you to be safe." Harry voice is sad and Louis knows it's because he's not going to be able to see him for a week and all Louis wants to get on the train and feel sorry for himself.  
  
"I will." Louis breaths out as tears rise up behind his sunglasses. Louis switches his cane from his right hand to his left, he digs his right hand in his jacket pocket and grabs the box out of it. It's Harry's present and he warped it himself, but that's what makes it special, the poorly placed bow, wrinkles and holes on the wrapping paper. "Merry Christmas." He holds his hand out flat the present lying in it.  
  
Harry slides his hands off of Louis and gently picks the passage from Louis. Louis closes his eyes and fiddles with his fingers as he waits for Harry's reaction and it sucks because Louis knows that Harry has opened it, the sound of wrapping paper being ripped has already happened and he wants to see his face, he wants to see it so bad, see if he likes it or not.  
  
"Lou?" Harry breaths out and Louis knows that it was stupid. God why did he get this?  
  
"I'm sorry Harry, I-I just thought, god I don't know. Here I'll take it." Louis reaches his hands out as he tries to find and grab the present back from Harry, embarrassment coursing through his veins tears filling up in his eyes.  
  
"Lou." Louis just shakes his he's and searches for the box. "Louis." Harry wraps one hand around both of Louis' wrists. "It's perfect."  
  
"Don't lie Harry." Louis whispers as he struggles to get out of Harry's hands.  
  
"I love it. It shows how much you trust me and I love you." Harry says and let's go of Louis' wrists. "And now I get to come into your house when you're sleeping and stare at you." Harry chuckles and Louis giggles at him.  
  
"That wasn't what I expected when I gave you the key to my flat." Louis giggles.  
  
"Well, it's my present and I'm going to use it to its full extent."  
  
"You're making me regret this." Louis jokes. Harry just laughs and kisses Louis. Their lips work together and way too soon they pull away.  
  
"You better go." Harry whispers quietly.  
  
"Yeah. I love you Harry." He breaths out, sad that he's leaving Harry but happy that he's going home.  
  
"I love you more." Harry pulls him in for a hug and kisses his forehead before walking Louis to the train door. "Have a Merry Christmas babe and a happy birthday too."  
  
Louis nods and smiles sadly as he walks onto the train and to his seat. Let's hope this trip goes by fast so he can get back to Harry ASAP.  
  
*

"Louis!" His mum yells as soon as he steps off the train. Ten pairs of arms wrap around his and Louis is home but something is missing.  
  
They family heads home and Louis goes to his old room. He might not be able to see but just being in this room brings back the millions of scaring events that happened throughout his life. The hurt, screams and tears are still gently lying on almost every surface of the room but some spots are still filled with happiness, like when his sisters were boring or when he finally graduated.  
  
He walks over to his closet, opens it and sets his suitcase inside it. He remembers lying underneath all the hanging clothes as he finally finds out that he was gay. Ironic isn't it.  
  
He sighs and walks over to sit on his bed, it squeaks under his weight. It didn't always squeak, it started the first day he came home when he was blind. The squeaks only progressed, getting louder and louder every time something bad happened in his life.

Louis falls back onto the bed and smiles because he's happy when he's home but the smile fades when a part if his heart is still floating somewhere around London.  
  
He misses Harry already and it hasn't even been 24 hours.  
  
*  
  
"Happy Birthday, boo." His mum says as he paddles into the kitchen rubbing his sunglass free eyes.  
  
"Thanks mum." He smiles at her as he sits at the table his face leaning against his hand.  
  
"What do you plan on doing today?" She asks as she sets down a tea in front of Louis.  
  
"Nothing, I'll call Harry later and wish him a Merry Christmas though." He moves his hand to his cup and sips on it melting in the taste he misses. He can't exactly make tea alone.  
  
Harry has only answered Louis when he called him last week when he first got home. Since then Harry hasn’t answered any of Louis' calls and Louis is worried that he took this time away from Louis to move on. Louis hasn't gotten a good night sleep because he's just so nervous that Harry left him.  
  
"How is that boy?" Jay asks.  
  
"He's good. He hasn't answered any of my calls and I'm just worried."  
  
"Don't be, boo. That boy has your heart."  
  
"How do you know?" Louis asks as sips his tea again.  
  
"Honey I'm your mum I see everything. You have glowing ever since you got here." Louis smiles down at the table. "He must be pretty special." Jay says making Louis blush.  
  
"He's the best thing that's ever happened to me." Louis states and it's true so true. Harry helped Louis so much and Louis is so thankful for him.  
  
"And you're the best thing that's happened to me."  
  
Louis whips around in his chair and faces Harry. His face breaks into a smile as he gets up and runs into Harry's arms. Louis throws his arms around Harry's neck.  
  
"I missed you and it was only a week." Louis whispers in Harry's ears.  
  
"I missed you more." Harry whispers as he attaches his lips to Louis'. Louis giggles into Harry's mouth as he tries to kiss back but his smile is too bright to do so. "I'm sorry I didn't call I wanted surprise you on your birthday...so surprise!" Harry chuckles and Louis smiles up at him with his arms still around Harry’s neck and Harry’s hands on Louis’ waist. “Do you want your present?” Louis nods and untangles them as he grabs Harry’s hand and leads them to Louis’ room.

They sit on Louis’ bed and Harry sets a present in Louis’ lap as he whispers Happy Birthday into his ear. Louis grabs the edge of the wrapping paper and tears it back, making a mess as he throws it on the bed behind them. Louis runs his hands over the present. It’s a book, two books actually. His fingers run over the familiar bumps on the cover and smiles as he reads the first book:  _How to become an editor._ He moves the books so the bottom on is on top now as he runs his fingers across the second one:  _How to date the popstar: Harry Styles._  Louis down at the books in his lap, not only did Harry get him two perfect books he got him two perfect books in braille.

“Harry, thank you so much. I love it.” Louis says as he runs his hands all over the books.

“You’re welcome babe. You get your Christmas present when we get home.”

“What?”

“Your mum said I can stay for Christmas.”

“Really?!” Louis smiles brightly.

“Yes.” Harry says as he kisses Louis. Louis melts into the kiss, as always, and smiles as he runs his hand over the books again.

“I’m going to read these.” Louis says as he pulls away and moves back on the bed until he is leaning against the headboard. Harry follows in suit as he moves so that his head is in Louis’ lap. Louis opens the popstar book and gets started. Half way through the first chapter he realizes that the bed hasn’t squeaked since Harry got here.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK :D


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is 3,333 words haha i thought that was funny. Anyways its Louis' birthday and i cant stop crying. THank you to everyone who is reading this, I hope you like this chapter. Um thats about it. Oh and have a Merry Christmas!! :)
> 
> Enjoy :)

"So Harry, how is it like being famous?" Jay asks from the head of the table. Louis only got three chapters in the book before Harry fell asleep and then half way through the book before Jay called the two boys down for dinner.  
  
Now they sit at the table, Jay at the head, the twins on either side of her, Lottie and Fizzy next to Daisy and Louis and Harry next to Phoebe. They just sat down and Louis can feel Harry nerves and Louis just wants to comfort him. Funny, for once Louis doesn't need the comfort.  
  
"Um, it's fun to a point I guess. It's weird knowing that you have many people out there that know more about you than you do. Sometimes all the screaming fans get annoying. But mostly it's just all really surreal." Harry answers and Louis can hear his shaky his voice is and Louis never thought that he has ever heard Harry sound like that. Louis puts his right hand under the table and moves it over to Harry, who moves his own hand down and threads their fingers together. Harry's hand is hot and clammy and Louis feels horrible about it.  
  
"So you like it?" Fizzy pipes up.  
  
"It has its perks." Harry says his voice much calmer.  
  
"Like Louis?" Daisy giggles out and her twin joins with her. Louis blushes at the question as he waits for Harry's answer.  
  
"Yes, he is the best thing that fame got me." Harry says and Louis feels his eyes on him so he turns his head and smiles at Harry even though his face is burning with blush. Harry starts rubbing his thumb along the back of Louis' hand as the girls change the subject and talk nonstop about Christmas presents.  
  
The rest of dinner is spent with Harry and Louis' hands under the table as Harry whispers sweet things into Louis ear randomly. The girls at the table watch them closely each time Harry leans over to Louis and thankfully they don't comment.  
  
*  
  
Louis wakes up the next morning with a heavy weight on his chest. Not a metaphoric weight no a legit heavy weight. Harry fell asleep with his chest lying across the top of Louis'. He told Louis he was protecting him and Louis just shrugged because he was cold and Harry was warming him up.  
  
Louis slowly scoots out from under Harry and off the bed. He stands up as he realizes what day it is. A though pops into Louis' head and he smirks as he looks at the bed, where Harry lays. He's going to do like all the books he read always said.  
  
"Harry! Wake up Harry its Christmas!" Louis shouts as he jumps on Harry and grabs his shoulders shaking Harry awake. "It's Christmas!" He yells again, smiling with laughter.  
  
"I'm up." Harry groans in the pillow and Louis feels Harry twists around to face Louis. Louis stops bouncing and sits back on his feet his hands in his lap with a full smile on his face.  
  
"It's Christmas." Louis whispers as the mattress moves until Harry is stilling in front of him his smelly breath hitting Louis' nostrils making him scrunch up his nose.  
  
"It is isn't it?" Harry says and Louis nods violently, his smile still huge as ever. "You look so cute right now babe, like a little kid." Louis just shrugs his shoulders and blushes. Louis feels Harry move closer to him and Louis closes his eyes because he knows what's coming. A pair of soft lips hit Louis' forehead, making him frown. "Your breath smells." Harry whispers and Louis giggles at him.  
  
"So does yours!" Louis giggles.  
  
"This sounds familiar; I think we both know where this is going." Harry voice goes to a whisper as he finishes his statement. Louis gently nods his head as he waits for Harry to lean in. A soft pair of lips gently touches his own and Louis brings his hand up to the back of Harry's neck, Harry doing the same.  
  
Harry leans forward so he's on his knees and Louis follows him in suit. Harry other hand travels to Louis' lower back as he pulls his closer. Just as Harry licks Louis' bottom lip there is a knock at Louis' door. Louis quickly pulls away and sits back on his knees, breathing faster than normal.  
  
"Come in." He chokes out as he brushes his hair from his forehead.  
  
"Louis dear. Me and your sisters are going to your Grandma's and I know that you two don't get along so will you and Harry be okay if I leave you guys here alone?" She explains, her voice is sweet and understanding. Louis and his grandma used to be best friends but when he came out as gay she became very distant and then when he became blind she ignored him and pretended he was never even there.  
  
"Yeah mum, we'll be fine." Louis says quietly.  
  
"Okay, I love you boo. We should be back around noon." Jay says and Louis nods at her as she closes the door. The two boys sit in silence for a couple minutes before Harry speaks up.  
  
"I noticed you haven't worn your glasses here and I just want you to know that you look good with them on but you look so much better with them off." Harry makes Louis blush so much. Louis will be dead and Harry would still be able to make him blush.  
  
"Thanks. I just don't like my eyes so I try to wear them as much as possible." Louis says and he feels Harry move closer to him, taking Louis' hands in his own.  
  
"How can you know that you don't like your eyes?" Harry asks and Louis knows that he means how can Louis not like his own eyes if he has never seen them like how they are now.  
  
"I've been told how ugly and dull they are. How they are empty and scary to look at." Louis squeezes his eyes shut and tilts his head down towards Harry's and his hands.  
  
"That's a lie because," Harry releases one of Louis hands, two of his fingers slip under Louis chin as he brings Louis face up into they are leveled. Louis so, so, slowly open them, hoping that he could just see. "You have the prettiest eyes ever. They tell a story, if you look deep you can see the darkness from your past and then if you move forward you see yourself now, happy and last you see the color of the ocean, the beautiful blue that I love so much." Harry rubs his hand along Louis shoulder as he speaks. Louis' face turns bright red at Harry's comment and he doesn’t bother closing his eyes because maybe his eyes aren't that bad.  
  
"Thank you Harry." Louis gets a sweet kiss as a welcome. "But you don't need to look at them to long. I'm done with school in May and hopefully I'll find a good paying editor’s job and then I'll save up enough and hopefully the doctors will tell me I qualify for the surgery." Louis explains proudly. The worst part of that is no one will hire a blind editor but Louis just needs to cross his fingers tightly.  
  
"Save up enough what?" Harry asks and his voice shocks Louis, its stern and demanding. Louis internally shakes in fear of Harry sudden mood change.  
  
"Money." Louis answers. Harry squeezes his hand tightly before letting go and moving away causing Louis to frown. Louis feels the mattress rise as Harry gets off the bed.  
  
"How much money?" Harry asks from behind Louis who turns to face him.  
  
"I don't know it all depends on if I quality for the surgery and even if I do they said it might not work." Louis rushes out his words quickly, nervous with how Harry is reacting right now.  
  
"How much?" Harry growls out causing Louis to shrink back into himself.  
  
"The last time I went, which three years ago, the doctor told me that the minimum price would be half a million." Louis whispers out, terrified of Harry right now.  
  
"Louis! Why didn't you tell me this?" Harry shouts out and Louis is having trouble concentrating because Harry is pacing at the bottom of his bed.  
  
"I didn't know it was important." Louis tilts his head down, letting his hair fall in front of his face.  
  
"How is it not important?" Harry moves to right in front of Louis. "I could have paid for it; you could be able to see by now." He explains his voice gentler but still stern.  
  
"Harry it's not that simpl-."  
  
"Not that simple! Louis I make millions a year! I think I can spare some to help the love of my life!" Harry shouts loudly, only a foot away from Louis who is terrified as ever.  
  
"Harry I-" Louis is shaking.  
  
"I mean." Harry laughs out. "Why wouldn't you ask me?"  
  
"Because I don't want to use your money." Louis whispers.  
  
"But that's the thing you're not." Harry's voice is calm now and Louis feels the bed dip as Harry moves to that their knees are touching. "I want to give this to you. I want to pay for it." Harry says and Louis just shakes his head at him.  
  
"It's not that simple."  
  
"How! How is it not simple?" Harry voice is angry now and Louis snaps.  
  
"It's not simple Harry!" Louis climbs off the bed. "It's simple going to the doctors, it's simple as you let him do a bunch of tests on you, it's simple as you listen to him tell you that you qualify for the test but it's not simple as he tell you the price. Then you come along and say you'll pay for it and it's not that simple." Louis throws his hands in the air and takes a deep breath before sitting back on his bed. "Now that I know you can pay for it, it's not simple. When I became blind, it was not simple and now, 14 years later, it scares me knowing that I actually have the chance to see again." Louis sighs and Harry scoots up behind him and wraps his arms around Louis and setting his chin on Louis' shoulder.  
  
"I understand that you're sacred babe, but I'll be here every step if the way." Harry says softly.  
  
"How can you want to pay? I've only known you for two months."  
  
"And that's all it took me to fall head over heels for you." Harry whispers in Louis' ear and gently kisses his neck. "How about we forget about everything and just enjoy Christmas?" Harry asks politely and Louis nods his head. Louis stands up, Harry doing the same but as Louis starts walking towards his door arms wrap around him, just below his bum. He lets out a girly scream as Harry lifts him up and over his shoulder.  
  
"Harry!" Louis screeches out. "Let me down you giant!" He laughs and softly hits Harry's back, which his actually really muscular and Louis wonders what it feels like without a shirt on.  
  
"Naw. You're 22 now if I let you down you might break your hip."  
  
"Harry." Louis gaps out and hits him harder in the back. "I am not old."  
  
"True someone as old as you wouldn't have such a plump ass." Harry smacks Louis' bum causing Louis' face to burn with blush. Louis huffs as Harry smacks his bum again as they walk down the stairs. Louis gently taps Harry's back as Harry carries him to wherever.  
  
"Where are we going? My house is not this big." Louis states after a couple minutes of silence.  
  
"I know." Harry sets Louis down gently. His feet hit the cold cement.  
  
"Why are we in the garage?"  
  
"It has the most room." Harry says. Louis listens to his heavy footsteps patter across the floor.  
  
"Why do we need room?"  
  
"Because I said so." Harry runs back over to Louis just as the sound of music fills the room. Harry grabs Louis' right hand and places his other hand on Louis' lower back, pulling him closer. Louis cautiously puts his left hand on Harry back.  
  
The two boys move in sync with the song, Harry only stepping on Louis' foot twice, as they gently move around the room. Harry guides Louis across the room a couple more times before the music switches to a slow song and the two boys rearrange themselves.  
  
Harry's hand travel to Louis' lower back while Louis' travel to Harry's neck. Louis sets his head on Harry's chest as Harry starts to hum along with the song, rubbing Louis' back gently. They sway back and forth slowly.  
  
Louis feels safe and sound here, in Harry's arms, like if anyone were to come Harry could just cover Louis' completely and shield Louis from any harm and Louis likes that thought. A taller boy is what Louis always wanted and Harry Styles is just what Louis needs.  
  
The song ends and Louis lifts his head up towards Harry's face. Louis licks his lips slowly before standing on his tip toes and pushing his mouth to Harry's. Harry kisses back instantly as he pushes his tongue past Louis' lips and licks into Louis' mouth.  
  
Harry moves his hands to Louis' ass, he gently squeezes it once causing Louis' to moan softy into his mouth. Harry's hands move down to Louis' thighs and he lifts up his legs and wraps them around Louis who squeaks in surprise.  
  
Louis' and Harry's tongues continue to work together as Harry carries him. Louis doesn't really care where because his lower abdomen is burning and he just wants to do whatever him and Harry do.  
  
Louis is thrown on the bed and Harry straddles his waist attaching his lips to Louis' neck. Louis moves his neck to give Harry more room as his hands fling up and grips the back of Harry's shirt.  
  
"Harry." Louis breaths out. Harry starts to grind down on Louis and it feels good but Louis wants more. Is there more? "Harry." Louis says again and Harry hums in response against Louis' neck. "I need more." Louis breaths out, his eyes shutting slowly.  
  
"What?" Harry sits up, removing his lips from Louis' neck.  
  
"I-I just-something please." Louis whines out. He's hot and sweaty and he just wants something more than the friction from grinding, he wants, he wants to be touched.  
  
"Yeah, yeah I can do that." Harry moans out before giving Louis a tiny kiss. "Let me know if it's too much."  
  
One at a time Harry's fingers slips under Louis' pjs bottoms. Louis is breathy heavy as his nerves run high. What is happening? Soon Harry's whole hand is under Louis' boxers gently resting on Louis' pelvic bone. Louis is burning everywhere.  
  
"Louis, babe, you need to breath I'm right here." Harry whispers in Louis ear. Louis nods his head but his heavy breathing doesn't stop. "I got you." Harry says before his fingers gently trail onto Louis' cock.  
  
"Oh my god." Louis breaths out as he squeezes his eyes shut even more. Harry slowly wraps his hand around Louis and it's so much there is so much. Louis' is burning and he knows that he is going to come soon and Harry hasn't even done anything yet. "Harry." He whispers just as Harry starts to move his hand up Louis' cock once. "I-i-i" He stutters out as Harry moves his hand down Louis and back up. That's when Louis can't hold it back anymore and he comes all over his boxers and Harry's hand.  
  
"Lou?" Harry questions and Louis might be stupid and no nothing about sex but he does know that he wasn't supposed to come that soon.  
  
"I'm so sorry, Harry I-" Louis says as the tears fill up and escape from his eyes.  
  
"No babe, it's okay." Harry gets off of Louis and scoops him up, putting him in his lap and cuddling him like a baby.  
  
"But I'm such a loser." Louis covers his face with his hands, too embarrassed and ashamed to look at Harry.  
  
"No. Not at all babe. It's normal for...unexperienced people to come early." Harry gently rubs Louis' back.  
  
"You're not mad?" Louis wipes his eyes and turns his head up to Harry.  
  
"No, never ever." Harry kisses Louis gently. Louis smiles and sifts in Harry's lap, hitting something hard and Louis knows what it is.  
  
"Show me how what you did to me." Louis says as me climbs out of Harry's arms.  
  
"Are you sure?" Louis nods at him and Louis listens to the sound of Harry moving. "Give me your hand." Louis does and Harry guides it until he is touching a very hard very thick cock. Louis gulps as Harry wraps Louis hand around it, barely, and Harry places his hand over Louis'.  
  
"This is called a hand job." Harry explains as he starts to move their hands slowly. "And if you do it to yourself it's called maturbating." Harry's breath is uneven as he speaks. "Try to get the whole thing." Harry brings Louis' hand all the way down until it hits his abs and all the way up to the tip. "And run your thumb over the slit." Harry moves Louis' thumb over the slit. That weird sticky stuff is on Louis' thumb now and as Harry drags their hands back down it cover the rest of it.  
  
Louis knows that Harry's cock must be huge because it takes a while to get from the top to the bottom. Harry takes his hand off of Louis'. Louis takes a deep breath before doing just want Harry told him.

"A little faster babe. Move your hand faster." Louis does so and Harry moans out. Smiling Louis quickens his pace because if Harry is moaning then Louis' doing something right. "Louis." Harry moans out and Louis blushes at the fact that he's touching someone else's penis and they like it. Louis runs his thumb across the slit just like Harry said. "M' gonna come." He says and Louis' thumb touches Harry's slit one last time before the weird sticky substance is on Louis' hand. He doesn't stop moving, only slows down a little, as he waits for Harry to tell him to stop. "That's good." Harry says and Louis lets go.  
  
"Was I okay?" Louis questions quietly.  
  
"Perfect babe, absolutely perfect." Harry says and kisses Louis' blushing cheek. "I'll be right back." Louis listens as Harry gets off the bed and leaves the room.  
  
The weird sticky cum is on Louis' hand. Curiosity gets the best of him. Louis brings his hand to his face and smells it, nothing. Then cautiously he lowers it to his mouth. He sticks his tongue out and brings his hand towards it. He touches something and it's salty yet sweat, and honestly it doesn't taste that bad. Louis shrugs and licks all around his hand, until there is no more left.  
  
"Wow, that was hot." Harry says from the door way and Louis jumps back slightly.  
  
"Sorry I just wanted to see what it was like and it's good." Louis whispers quietly.  
  
"There's nothing wrong with that babe." Harry makes the bed dip as he gets back on it. "Every guy had tasted cum before weather it's their own or not." Harry whips off Louis' licked hand with a wet rag.  
  
"So I'm not weird?"  
  
"Not at all but your mum will be home soon and I'd rather you not have to walk around in sticky boxers."

"Yeah." Louis giggles and climbs off the bed. "I'll be back." Louis kisses Harry's cheek before walking out of the room and into the shower and he thinks to himself that this sex this isn't so bad, especially if he gets to taste more of Harry's cum.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is horrible and im really sorry but next chapter is going to be better 
> 
> try to enjoy it

It's New Year’s Eve and Louis can't sleep.  
  
Harry brought him home three days ago to show Louis his present, the best and comfiest sheets ever: silk. Harry then kissed Louis goodbye and left to go visit his own family where he has been since.  
  
Thankfully Harry kept in touch this time while the two boys are apart. He kept calling Louis every chance he got telling him that he missed him and he couldn’t  wait to hold Louis in his arms again.  
  
The fireworks boom loudly drowning out Louis’ sighs as he sits up in bed. The small boy throws his legs over the side of the bed and reaches for his phone lying on the bed stand.  
  
"Call Harry." He says and presses the cold surface against his face and ear. He hopes he'll pick up even though it's late but then again its New Year’s.   
  
"Louis!" Harry's voice is different as he speaks his words are slurred together and it's hard to understand him with all the background noise but Louis' ears are perfect so he manages. "I've been thinking about you, babe. I miss you."  
  
"I miss you to Harry." Louis smiles into the phone. “When will I see you again?”  
  
"Soon, very soon." Harry giggles out. "I'm at your door." The line goes dead and then a knock occurs at Louis' door. Frowning he stands up off the bed and slowly makes his way to the front door. "Ohh Lou." Harry coos from the other side of the door. Louis is really confused and worried so he quickly unlocks the door, flinging it opened when he's done.  
  
"Harry?" He questions before a heavy weight is on his, strong arms wrap around his neck. Harry puts all his weight on Louis making his stumble backward.  
  
"Babe I missed you." Harry pulls away and gives Louis a sloppy kiss. Louis licks his lips and cringes at the taste, what has Harry been drinking. The door slams shuts and Louis listens as Harry stumbles forward, again grabbing onto Louis for help. "Sorry babe." Harry giggles and his breath makes Louis' nose wrinkle.  
  
"You're breath smells." Louis smiles as Harry lets go of Louis.  
  
"Alcohol does that to you." Harry says before he walks away from Louis and toward the kitchen. Louis frowns at him as he follows.  
  
"Are you drunk?" Louis asks when he enters the kitchen, standing a step into the doorway.  
  
"Duh!" Harry walks closer to Louis and places his hand on Louis' hips; he leans in to Louis' ear. "And horny." Harry licks a stripe from Louis' collarbone to his ear. He nibbles right below Louis' jawline before sucking violently on it.  
  
Louis does not like this one bit. He's scared and worried that something horrible is about to happen just like those three men in the alley way that Harry had to beat up and if something bad happens now Harry won’t beat up himself.  
  
"Harry." Louis places his hands to Harry's chest and pushes back.  
  
"What?" Harry snaps at him. Louis shrinks into himself as Harry grips Louis' hair tightly and yanks his head to the side causing Louis cries out in pain. He attaches his lips to Louis' neck and it's not like how it usually is no it's uncomfortable. "M' gonna fuck you so hard." Harry mumbles against his neck as his hands travel from Louis' hips to his ass. He squeezes his cheeks and Louis snaps.  
  
He puts his hands on Harry's chest and uses all of his strength to push his back. Louis knows that if that took him everything then if Harry was sober then it would be impossible to get him off but also this wouldn't happen if Harry was sober. That's what he needs, to bring back his Harry, sober Harry.  
  
Louis listens as Harry stumbles back into the counter, his big hands echoing through the kitchen when they hit the marble. Louis breaths heavy as emotions run through him, scared, confused, angry, and sad.  
  
"Louis." Harry growls and his steps echo as he walks towards Louis again. Determined Louis holds his stance, knowing that the Harry he loves is deep down under this drunken one. A big hand touches his chest and Louis reacts quickly and slaps it away. Harry touches his hip and Louis slaps that one away too. Harry grips his crotch tightly and Louis' eyes widen as he screams and jumps away from Harry feeling violated and uncomfortable.  
  
Tears fill in his eyes as he hears Harry walk closer to him. Louis waits until Harry touches him again before he starts waving his arms and hitting Harry in the chest, stomach, arms, anything he can reach that will bring back his Harry. Harry doesn't react though, only taking this opportunity to run his hands over Louis' small curvy body.

"STOP! HARRY STOP!" Tears roll down his face and Harry only laughs as he guides Louis to the wall. Louis screams louder when he hits the wall, knowing he is trapped he slaps Harry harder. Louis swings his right hand up high and the sound of skin on skin echoing through the room freezes them both.  
  
Louis just slapped Harry's cheek.  
  
He gulps as he lowers his hands, Harry doing the same to his body. Louis crumbles to the ground as tears rush quickly down his face.  
  
"Louis!" Harry voice is back to normal, no more slur only a sense of worry. Louis puts his face in his hands and he hears Harry's breath move closer to him. "Louis-" Harry places a hand on Louis' shoulder. Louis flinches back and cries into his hands harder. "Babe." Harry whispers causing Louis' head to snap up.  
  
"Get out!" Louis shouts at him. "Get out of my flat." He sobs out. "I-" He chokes on his sob and buries his face in his hands again. He humiliated and ashamed and frightened.  
  
"I'm sorry." Harry whispers and Louis listens to his footsteps walk away and the door slamming shut.  
  
"Get out." Louis whispers one last one before he cries himself to sleep on the kitchen floor.  
  
*  
  
It's been three days since Harry came into Louis' flat drunk and Louis as ignored every call, voicemail and visit from Harry. Louis will talk to Harry when he's ready and right now he just needs space, lots and lots of space.  
  
Louis is walking home from the store when he just happens to bump, literally bump, into Harry Styles. Who the fuck bumps into a boyband member?  
  
"Ow. Sorry." Louis mumbles out when he hits a very muscular back.  
  
"Lou." Harry breathes out causing Louis to freeze in his spot.

“I have to go.” Louis rushes out.

"Let me explain the other night please Louis." Harry rushes out and puts his hand on Louis' shoulder, Louis flinches back away from him as he shakes his head. He needs to get out of here.  
  
"Please let me go." Louis whispers quietly.  
  
"Louis I-"  
  
"Please." Louis begs.  
  
"Okay. I'm sorry Louis." He steps aside and let's Louis walk away.  
  
"I know Harry. I just need some space." Louis says not think Harry will hear him.  
  
"I love you!" Harry yells after him and Louis hopes no fans or paps are around because everything will be even worse than it already is.  
  
*

“Louis, babe, I love you and I’m so sorry for the other night I didn’t mean for it to happen.” End of Voicemail.

“Play next voicemail Jenny.” Louis says into his phone.

“Hey its Harry, I miss you.” He was crying, Louis can hear is tears and it breaks Louis’ heart. He plays the next one. “I would never do that to you Louis and you know it. I wasn’t myself and if you give me the chance ill explain everything to you.” Next. “I will never drink again it was just some fucked up New Year’s Eve party and my friends were all grinding with their loves and I wanted to be with mine.” Next. “I’m sorry.”

“No more voicemails.” Jenny announces and Louis falls back onto his bed. He wants to forgive Harry he really does.

“AHH! Why!?” Louis shouts and throws one of his pillows across the room. “I love him.” Louis says as tears start to fall slowly down his cheeks, Louis flips over and buries his face into the silk bed sheets. “I love him.” Louis whispers as he dozes off.

*  
  
Louis sighs as he locks his front door and makes his way slowly to work. He walks in and travels to the piano, running his fingers along the edge before he sits down. Louis smiles as he pressed a few of the keys to check they are in tune. This is his second favorite thing, first being an editor second a pianist.  
  
He closes his eyes behind his sunglasses before he allows himself to float through the normal song routine.  
  
It's time like these when Louis' mind wonders off and right now it wondered to Harry. To all the good times they had, all the love they shared and it's only been two months. If they are so perfect together like Louis thinks then maybe, just maybe Harry didn't mean for New Year’s Eve to happen. He did say he was sorry and ran out, he was drunk and people that are drunk don't think straight, or at least that's what the books he read said.  
  
Even though his ass of a teacher gave him one about alcohol and drugs and told him to edit it which he did, very well if he can say so himself, and still managed to fail it just because his teacher doesn't believe Louis will succeed and live as an editor all because he's blind and to him "You need your eyes for everything."  
  
But Harry, Harry loves Louis blind and all. He even offered to let Louis see again. He yelled he loves Louis even though they were outside, he could have ended his career by that. Harry truly cares about him and tries so hard. If he can be with Louis even though he's blind then hopefully Louis can forgive him for this mistake.  
  
Louis finishes his shift when Logan, the night pianist, comes and takes Louis' spot. He leaves with a smile of determination on his face.  
  
"Call Niall." He says when he exits work.  
  
"Lou! My big ass man! What's up?" Niall shouts into the phone and Louis is pretty sure he said this before but he doesn't comment.  
  
"I'm outside my flat building do you think to can come and take me to Harry's?" Louis asks as he quickly turns a corner.  
  
"Yeah! I'll be right there. Don't move." Niall laughs out before the line goes dead. Louis shakes his head at Niall as he walks into his flat. He gets changed quickly, slipping on his silk shirt Harry got him and jogging back to the street. "Louis! Get in!" Louis follows Niall's voice and hops into the car.  
  
The two start driving and of course Niall doesn't shut up and Louis really wishes he would and focus on his driving because Louis is starting to get car sick.  
  
*  
  
Louis has been standing at Harry's door for ten minutes and he can't seem to find the courage that he had when he left work. He wants him and Harry to be together more than anything but he needs to hear what Harry has to say about New Year's Eve before anything.  
  
Louis takes a deep breath and reaches his hand up about to knock, when the sound of the doorknob turning stops him. The door creeks open.  
  
"Louis?" Harry's voice is full of so much hope that Louis really wants them to sort this out. "Come in." Louis does so and follows Harry's footsteps. "Sit down." Harry says and Louis does so falling comfortably on the soft sofa.  
  
"I came here because I've been thinking and if you truly love me like I think then yeah." Louis trails off lamely not entirely sure how he can describe his mind.  
  
"I do Louis; I love you so fucking much. That night I was drunk and my idiot of a friend gave me a pill for my headache but I don't think it was what she said. So I was super drunk and high when I came to your house. Honestly babe, if I can take back that night I would. I'd trade everything to take that night back." Louis has been listening for fourteen years and he can hear everything and Harry's voice is full of honesty.  
  
"Harry, I was scared." Louis whispers.  
  
"I know babe I know but when you slapped me I came back to my senses and I saw what I was doing, and I couldn't believe myself. Do you really think I would do it if I was aware of myself?" Harry asks and Louis shakes his head. "Exactly I would never do that! I told you before that I'd wait forever for you and if you didn't want to I wouldn't either." Harry explains and gently places a hand on Louis' knee. Louis breaths deeply. "I love you babe, can you forgive me."  
  
"I guess I can. I love you too." Louis says. "But the, um..sex stuff needs to cool down for a while." Louis blushes.  
  
"I can do that. I can and will do anything for you." Harry whispers before leaning and giving Louis a lingering kiss. Louis hates to admit it but god he misses that, Harry's lips are just so soft. "Now that I got you here and since we are talking about serious things," Harry sighs before continuing. "Niall and his big mouth blabbed to management about us and now they are attacking me. They want to know if we are serious and if so do we plan on coming out even though the whole world thinks I'm straight." Harry sounds super annoyed and Louis would feel the same if he was in his position.  
  
"I think your management is just full of mean people." Louis huffs out and crosses him arm like a child.  
  
"Babe." Harry chuckles. "What do you think we should do?"  
  
"I think we should stay a secret." Louis whispers and drops his head. "I mean the other boys career depends on this and I don't think I'll be able to handle all the crazy hair-ripping fans.." Louis admits and he's been thinking about this for a while. He will never be able to handle the crazy yelling and threats and having his picture taken then Harry would have to explain to everyone how he's blind and can't do shit. Just not a good choice for someone blind.  

"Yeah, also I like you my dirty little secret." Harry whispers.  
  
"Is that a song?"  
  
"Ugh Lou! You got to go with it!" Harry whines out.  
  
"I need a heads up!" Louis laughs back his smile from eye to eye because he's missed this and yes it's only been three days but he really missed it.  
  
"Okay heads up Lou I’m going to tickle you." And he does until Louis is crying and begging for him to stop.  
  
And just like that the boyfriends are okay. The only thing is that the curly haired boy can't get over the fact that he can make Louis see again.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really like this chapter and i hope you do too.
> 
> ****(SPOILER: i cant write smut, sorry.)****
> 
> Enjoy :)

It's March now and the two boys have never been happier.  
  
Management let Louis and Harry be because it's not like they leave their homes anyways but if they do "than you two better be the two straightest poles ever." Louis only giggled a little at that threat, he can't be straight even if he acted completely straight people will look at him and see gay or at least that's what he thinks they'll see. They will see a total gay guy or hideous blind freak but either way they are right.  
  
Last month Louis let Harry and him get back to their 'sexual' things and Louis just might enjoy giving and getting handjobs too much. (Plus side is that Louis actually got to enjoy them more by not cumming instantly) Which is why, right now, he is standing at the edge of Harry's bed as he violently chews on his lip looking for the right words to say.  
  
"What's up babe?" Harry asks from where he is laying on the bed.  
  
"I've been thinking..." He starts and threads his fingers together.  
  
"About." Harry says whenever Louis doesn't continue.  
  
"I've been thinking about..." Louis closes his eyes and lets the blush spread across his face. "Sex." He whispers.  
  
"What?" Harry chokes out and Louis listens to him stand up and walk over to Louis.  
  
"It just that we...um, we always do the....handjobs." Louis whispers the last word like it’s a sin. "And I was hoping that we could...take it up a level?" Louis' face is burning and he's so embarrassed that he's 22 and can't deal with saying sexual things.  
  
"Yeah." Harry breaths out. "Fuck yeah. Do you want to start now?" Harry asks quickly and Louis can he's the hope in his voice. He nods his head and allows Harry to lead him over to his king size bed.  
  
"Before we start." Louis says as he sits on the edge of it. "What exactly are we doing?"  
  
"Blowjobs." Harry breaths out. "I'll do it to you first and then if you want you can do me."  
  
"O-okay."

"Lay down babe." Harry says as he gently places a hand on Louis' chest and pushes him down. "Scoot up." Louis does until he is fully on the bed with his head against Harry's pillow.  
  
"Okay." Louis breaths out. He's nervous but excited at the same time. Harry crawls up and over Louis, his legs on either side of him. He hovers over Louis until he dips down and gently kisses Louis.  
  
Louis kisses him back following Harry's moves just like how he always does. Harry licks Louis' lips and Louis opens his mouth quickly allowing Harry to enter and Louis just really loves Harry tongue. Harry hands slowly roam up Louis' side and up into Louis' hair. He grips it lightly as Louis wraps his arms around Harry's neck and pulls him closer.  
  
Harry starts to slowly grind down on Louis, making him get that wonderful feeling in his lower abdomen. Louis sticks his tongue into Harry's mouth and tastes the delicious cinnamon pancakes Harry made for breakfast. Harry takes advantage of Louis' tongue and closes his mouth sucking Louis' tongue farther in. Louis moans deeply at the feeling and his abdomen is on fire.  
  
"Harry." Louis breaks away from Harry's mouth. Harry nods against Louis' neck and gets off of Louis.  
  
"Babe, I'm going to take off your pants now." Harry says from down by Louis' feet.  
  
"I-I."

"Louis we don't have to do this." Harry grips Louis' hand tightly squeezing it lightly.  
  
"No." Louis shakes his head. "It's okay, I-I want this." Louis says and he does he wants this connection with Harry, even though they are only doing blow jobs, he wants to feel the intimate connection everyone else feels. Harry moves his hands to Louis jean button and stops, Louis nods at him his breath quickens as Harry pops out the buttom and starts to pull his pants down.  
  
"Lift your hips babe." Harry's voice is sweet and kind but Louis can sense something else behind it. Louis does so and Harry continues to pull his jeans off. Slowly, oh so slowly, Harry pulls his jeans through each of his feet leaving Louis with only his sweaty shirt and newly tight boxers. "I'm going to take your boxers off now." Harry says gently placing his hands on Louis' hemline.  
  
"Okay." Louis squeezes his eyes closes and lifts his hips for Harry. Louis is embarrassed and ashamed. This is the first time Harry ever saw...down there, hell even Louis hasn't seen it yet.  
  
"Wow." Harry whispers. "Perfect babe, so perfect." He climbs back up and kisses Louis gently. "I'm going to blow you know." His voice is deeper than normal. "Make you feel good." Louis already feels good but okay. He moves back down and Louis waits for something to happen. He's confused, his penis is hard against his thin t-shirt and Harry is going to give him a blowjob but so far no blowing has happened yet.  
  
Then it happens. Harry's soft hand grips Louis' cock and soon a weird wet object is around the tip. Louis' eyebrows knit together as he looks down, wishing he could see, wondering what's touching him right now. The wet object moves farther down his cock causing Louis to whine out in pleasure. Whatever is touching feels awaking. When the softness of Harry's hair and his rough nose touch his pelvis Louis knows that the warm wet thing is Harry, Harry's mouth more specifically.  
  
"I just thought you were going to blow on it." Louis breaths out not completely thinking straight as Harry sucking particularly hard on Louis' tip. "But god, this is amazing." Louis whines again and Harry moves up and down quickening his pace. Louis' hands fling bed, his hands curl into fists as he grips the blanket tightly.  
  
"Actually, m' Harry." Harry lifts off for a second to say that and then dives back onto Louis' dick. Louis moans loudly as his abdomen burns more and he knows he is close. Harry sucks on his tip, using his hand to slowly pump up and down Louis' dick.  
  
"Ha-Ha-Harry." Louis' moans out. "Gonna-" and then Harry goes right back to moving his perfect warm mouth up and down again. Louis feels Harry's tongue swirl around his cock as he moves. He goes to the tip and licks at Louis' slit. "Ahh!" Louis moans out as he holds back the burning feeling in his stomach, he's going to enjoy this. When Harry goes down Louis feels his dick hit something. It happens a second time and a third until Louis realizes that Harry's throat is hitting his dick and god that's hot.  
  
Harry's big hands come to rest on Louis' thighs, squeezing them lightly as he starts digging his nails into Louis. The small boy yells out in pleasure as Harry continuously hits Louis' cock with his throat. Louis cums when Harry digs his nails in the same time Louis' dick hits his throat. Louis moans loudly and he's glad that Harry lives in a soundproof building because that was loud.  
  
Harry moves his mouth to Louis' tip sucking and licking. Louis moans again as he feels Harry suck and sallow his cum. When Harry pulls off Louis is breathless lying half naked on the bed with his hands still tightly gripping the sheets. Harry climbs back up and hovers over Louis.  
  
"You know," Harry begins and Louis can hear his smirk already. "I've never heard someone make so many noises and be that loud too." Louis blushes and turns his head away in embarrassment. Harry leans down and presses his mouth against Louis' ear. "But god was that hot." He whispers as he presses his hard, still clothed, cock onto Louis' thigh.  
  
"My turn right?" Louis' voice is shaky as he talks. Afraid of everything right now. Will he do it right? Will Harry even enjoy it? Will Louis enjoy it?  
  
"Only if you want to." Harry's voice lost all it's cockiness and was replaced with concern. Harry brushes back a piece of Louis' hair as he moves down and pressed his lips to Louis. No movement just lips on lips and it makes Louis smile.  
  
"Yeah. Just don't expect me to be good or anything." Louis chuckles darkly as Harry moves off of him to lay next to him. "Please guide me." Louis whispers quietly.  
  
"Of course. First you need to breath because you look like you're going to faint." Louis does like Harry says and as he does so Louis hears the zip of jeans and the sound of Harry taking them off. "Now you need to get down until your head is level with my...dick." Louis nods and moves down the bed using the side of Harry to figure out where to stop. "Now straddle my lower legs." Louis nods again and places his shaking hand on the other side of Harry as he lift his leg and places it on the other side too.  
  
"Like this?" Even Louis' voice is shaky but hopefully Harry didn't hear.  
  
"Perfect babe. Now take my cock just like a hand job." Louis nods and moves his right hand off the bed and to Harry. He wraps his tiny fingers around the thick object and lets out a shaky breath. "We don't have to do this."  
  
"No." Louis shakes his head. "I want to. You did it to me and I'll do it back to you."  
  
"Louis we can wait. You don't have to do it now." Harry says and Louis just shakes his head as he breaths out again and starts to move his hand on Harry's cock.  
  
"Now what?" Louis asks, more confident now that he has almost started. He's actually about to do this. That he's actually about too make Harry feel just as good as Louis did.  
  
"Whenever you are ready put your mouth around the tip, no teeth, and start to suck like you would to a Popsicle or a lollipop." Harry's voice is deeper than normal.  
  
 Louis swallows the ball in his throat because slowly putting his lips around Harry's thick cock, stretching his mouth wide. He closes his eyes as he starts to suck, just on the tip and occasionally licking at the slit like Harry did to him. He gets a couple drops of Harry's cum and Louis moans with Harry still him his mouth.  
  
"Whenever you are ready start to move me deeper into your mouth. Just like a handjob but with your mouth." Harry is breathless and moans as Louis starts to slowly move down Harry. Louis moves down, trying to get all of it and when the tip hits the back of his throat he gaga and pulls off. He keeps his hand on Harry as he coughs into his elbow. "Babe, you don't have to do this." Louis shakes his head as he coughs more.  
  
"No, no I want to." Louis takes a deep breath before he goes back down on Harry. He puts his mouth on it, teeth hidden, as he starts to suck, just like Harry said, he sucks hard as he moves up and down Harry's length. Louis quickens his pace as he feels more confident. Harry lets out a deep moan whenever Louis licks his slit. Louis sucks on the tip a bit, swallowing some of Harry's cum. A big hand tangles itself into Louis' hair.  
  
Harry moans as Louis closes his eyes tightly and allows Harry to guide his head down until Harry hits the back of his throat, gagging Louis.  
  
"Relax babe." Harry says gently and he removes his hand. Louis nods lightly as he relaxes his throat and goes down again, this time when Harry's length hits his throat it doesn't hurt. "Lou." Harry moans out and Louis smiles as he continuously hits his throat with Harry's cock. "Gonna cum babe." Louis moves to Harry's tip and sucks hard trying to get the delicious cum from Harry.  
  
Harry moans loudly as his back arches and he shoots into Louis' mouth. Louis moans quietly as Harry's cum fills him mouth. He pulls off of Harry as he swallows his cum. Strong hands grip under his arms and pull him up until he is laying on top of Harry.  
  
"Bloody amazing babe." Harry kisses Louis' cheek.  
  
"Thanks Harry. You know I wouldn't mind doing that again." And it's true because Louis gets full access to Harry's cum.  
  
"Later babe. M' tired." He moves them so he is spooning Louis. When Louis feels Harry's soft dick against his thigh he realizes that he still doesn't have any pants on. He shakes his head as he just let's sleep overtake him, he'll change into pants tomorrow.

*

“Where is he?”

“He’s sleeping let him go.”

“I want to meet the guy my best friend drools over.”

“Not now, he’s sleeping.”

Louis rolls over in bed trying to find Harry’s warmth to snuggle in and fall asleep before whoever is talking wakes him up completely. All Louis find is the coldness of the bed. He sits up quickly.

“Harry?” He whispers as if something bad has happened. Louis slips out of Harry’s bed and flinches as the cold hair hits his private parts. “Harry?” No answer Louis sighs as he starts searching for pants to put on. Hard to find shit in a room that isn’t his.

“Are you almost done with the new album?”

“I’m half way there.” Louis freezes at those voices. One is Harry’s and the other is oddly familiar but no one he knows personally. Louis finally finds a pair of Harry’s sweatpants and slips them on, he rolls up the legs so he doesn’t trip and kill himself. Louis wraps his arms around himself as he makes his way out of Harry’s room and towards to voices.

“No way.”

“Just do it Harry, its not a big deal.”

“It’s a huge deal and its not like he wants me too.”

“Well you never know unless you try.”

“I have tried.”

“Try harder man.”

“I-.”

“Harry?” Louis whispers quietly as he finally enters the room. He looks down at his feet, afraid of the stranger. He fixes his shirt, pulling it down more to hit his tummy.

“Babe.” Louis hears the scrape of a chair moving and Harry’s heavy footsteps move closer. “Good morning.” Harry kisses Louis’ forehead and Louis smiles shyly at him, afraid of the strange in the room that he knows is watching them. “I made breakfast do you want some.” Harry asks and Louis turns his head to where the unknown stranger is sitting. “You don’t have to talk to him.” Harry whispers quietly.

“What did you make for breakfast?” Louis turns back to Harry.

“Cinnamon pancakes, as always.”

“I’ll have some.” Louis allows Harry to guide him over to the table. Louis sits down and focuses his head to the table, closing his eyes and wishing that he would have worn his sunglasses. Louis listens to Harry humming as he makes a plate for Louis in the kitchen.

“You’re Louis right?” The stranger says. Louis squeezes his eyes tightly and hopes Harry will come back because he said he didn’t have to talk to the stranger. After ten seconds and Harry still hasn’t returned Louis just slowly shakes his head. “I can tell you are just how he described you. He talks about you a lot, in fact he never shut the fuck up about you.” The stranger chuckles. “I’m Ed, Ed Sheeran.” Louis’ head fly’s up towards the stranger, Ed, his eyes wide opened. He is sitting in from of Ed Freaking Sheeran. Louis stands up quickly, he needs to get changed and fix his hair! He can’t meet Ed like this! “Woah Louis.” Ed says lightly and Louis takes a step back and trips over the chair falling hard onto his bum.

“What’s going on in here?” Harry rushes into the room and straight to Louis’ side, who is still looking at where Ed is completely shocked. “Jesus Ed! What did you do?” Harry touches Louis’ face and tries to snap him out of whatever he is in.

“I just introduced myself.”

“Louis, babe.” Harry coos and slowly, oh so slowly, Louis turns his head to Harry. “Are you okay?” Harry brushes back Louis’ hair.

“Yeah.” Louis nods and stands up with Harry’s help. Embarrassed he walks back to the table he closes his eyes and tilts his head down. “I’m a big fan. Its so great to meet you.” Louis says and for the first time ever he wishes he shook people’s hands.

“Great to hear that mate.” Ed says sweetly.

“How come you didn’t act like that when you met me?” Harry says hurt from behind Louis’.

“That’s because one, I had a lot of adrenaline that calmed and you’re not Ed Sheeran.”

“Wow I’m feeling the love.” Harry chuckles and walks back into the kitchen.

“You know, Harry really loves you.” Ed whispered across the table making Louis blush. “He’s writing a song about you.” Ed says and Louis looks up at him, eyes closed. “I showed me some of it and wow I never thought I would see the day where Harry Styles finds his soul mate.” Louis can’t believe what he is hearing. Harry is writing a song about _him._ Ed said that he is Harry’s _soul mate._

Harry walks back into the room and sets a plate in front of Louis. He slowly lowers himself to his chair, a smile appearing on his face and it’s not because Harry made him food or because Ed Sheeran is here, no Louis is Harry’s soul mate and soul mates will do anything for each other and maybe that’s why Harry is so keen on making Louis see again. If they really are soul mates then maybe, just maybe, Louis wouldn’t mind seeing his one day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughtss??


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one is a little shorter than my other chapters but it had to be 
> 
> Enjoy :)

"I go on tour in two weeks." Harry says from behind Louis where he is spooning him one the bed. "And I want you to come with me. The boys want you to come too."  
  
"You know I can't Harry." Louis sighs as he turns around to face Harry.  
  
"Why Lou? You'll have a blast. There are so many didn't places and cultures and food that you will love so much."  
  
"That's not for me." Louis admits. How could he enjoy anything if he can't go anywhere without Harry and what is he going to do when Harry isn't there to take him places? Harry is going to be out having a blast with his friends and seeing many fans and all the famous shit like that and Louis will be where? Stuck sitting in a hotel, that’s not going to happen.  
  
"Louis babe, just give it a chance. You would have a great time I promise." Harry places a hand on Louis' check an leans in to kiss his forehead lightly. Louis knows he’s trying to convince him with love and its noting going to happen. Louis may be blind in the eyes but he’s not blind to Harry’s tricks.  
  
"No Harry. I wouldn't, you would be spending time with the other boys or the band or anyone else you work with and not me. I'm too much of a hassle and you know it. I won't ever be comfortable around all those people you work with there are too many and I would have a break down." Louis admits shyly.  
  
"Yeah but if you meet them all now than in the future it won't be a problem when we go on tour again. I’ll introduce you to them, one at a time and I will be by you side the whole time." Harry has hope in his voice and Louis just frowns at it.  
  
"Harry I can't." Louis whispers and turns his body and head away from Harry. Harry wants him to do this just like how Harry wants him to see again and it hurts because Louis just can’t.   
  
"Fine." Harry untangles himself from Louis and gets off the bed. "You don't want to come then don't. I'm sorry that I want to spend time with my lovely boyfriend in different counties. So you can enjoy being by yourself and I'll try to enjoy my tour without my perfect boyfriend." Louis sits up to but is cautious of the anger in Harry's voice.  
  
"What about the fans?" Louis fiddles with his fingers.  
  
"What about them?" Harry snaps as he zips his pants up.  
  
"How will they react when they see a blind boy in every country with you? What will happen if they aproch us you know I can’t talk to new people. Or what if we get mobbed?"  
  
"I'll tell them it's my good friend and then we run away or get a bunch of security. If we get mobbed all hold you close and cover your ears, I won’t let anyone hurt the love of my life." Harry is so sweet and it makes Louis smile for a second.   
  
"I can’t be a good friend that you bring with you on tour and take to different counties and spend millions of time with? It's not going to work. Even if I did go no one would believe that we are just friends and I know you will protect me but I just can’t." Louis finishes as he climbs out of bed and moves to the bathroom. "I'm going to take a shower." He whispers as he starts to strip his pjs off.  
  
"What if I tell you I'm ready for the fans to know?" Harry asks from the bathroom door and Louis shrieks as he grabs his shirt and covers his torso.  
  
"You wouldn't because you have the boy’s careers to worry about, you said so yourself." Louis answers as he smooth’s the shirt that's covering him.  
  
"I know." Harry walks forward and places his hands on Louis' shoulders, all his angry long gone. "But I told them something and they said that they want us to come out."  
  
"What did you tell them?"   
  
"Nothing important." Harry runs his hands up and down Louis' bare arms. You think that Harry would have saw Louis naked before but no he tries his best to hide from Harry. “Just something that involves our six month anniversary in two weeks.”   
  
"What? Why would something unimportant that involves our anniversary make the boy’s let us come out?" Louis is super confused right now.  
  
"Cause they are my brothers and brothers suffer for each other." Harry places his hand on Louis' cheek and gently strokes it with his thumb.  
  
"Well I'm the curly haired brother's boyfriend and I say no." Louis giggles.  
  
"How about you just think about it? Everything. Tour and coming out and next week I'll ask you what you want to do." Harry says gently.  
  
"Deal." Louis smiles but he knows that he can't go on tour or come out. That's way too much for an innocent blind soul like him.  
  
*  
  
"This album sucks." Louis whispers to Harry where the two are snuggling on Harrys couch listening to music. Louis in between Harry's legs with his back to Harry's chest. Louis has three days to give Harry an answer about tour and a week and a half to find a present for Harry’s and his anniversary.  
  
"Yeah?" Harry whispers in Louis' ear. His mouth is close enough for Louis to feel Harry’s breath. "You know what's good music?" Harry gently puts his mouth right below Louis' ear and kisses. He moves does Louis' neck, leaving kisses in his wake. Harry's but hand trials onto Louis' thigh and he squeezes lightly making Louis' moan quietly. "Your moans." Harry slides his hand farther up Louis' leg and grips Louis' crotch.  
  
"H-Harry." Louis whines out as Harry sucks on Louis' neck harder. Harry starts to move his hand rubbing and occasionally squeezing Louis' growing cock. Harry bites Louis' neck gently making Louis moan loudly. Harry moves his other hand to Louis' pants unbuttons them and pulls out Louis' length.  
  
"So hard for me babe." Harry moves his mouth farther down and Louis bares his neck giving him more space as he starts to move his soft on Louis. He's slow at first working Louis' up, teasing him, soaking the multiple moans Louis releases. The two boys are too absorb with what they are doing that they don't here Harry's front door open.  
  
"Harry! You ne- oh my." Liam's voice sounds from the doorway of the room. Harry detaches his mouth from Louis neck. Louis' face turns bright red and tears full his eyes as he rips Harry's hand away from him an covers himself. Louis stands up quickly and faces away from the doorway as he stuff himself back into his pants and tries to ignore the tears of embarrassment falling from his eyes.  
  
"We are so sorry guys." Zayn says and of course Liam couldn't have been the only one to see that.  
  
"Yeah we didn't even think you would be here, Lou. Sorry." Niall says and Louis shakes his head. Everyone needs to come. Who else saw that? Louis is already embarrassed about himself enough he doesn't need more.  
  
"Can you give us a minute?" Harry says from the couch and Louis is just facing away from the door trying not to cry. Louis hears the boys shuffle out of the room as Harry gets off the leather couch, walking five steps over to Louis. "Babe." Harry says in front of Louis placing his hands on Louis' face wiping away the escaped tears.  
  
"I'm so embarrassed." Louis whispers as Harry pulls him in for a hug, Louis wrapping his arms around Harry's back.  
  
"Don't be. They won't say anything about it I promise." Harry places his chin on Louis' as he rubs down his back. "If they do I'll kill them." Harry says lightly.  
  
"That's intense but alright." Louis chuckles and allows Harry to leads him out of the room and to the boys.  
  
"Louis! My big ass man!" Niall shouts as always. "Missed you man. Haven't seen you in like a week." Niall laughs loudly making Louis smile.  
  
Harry puts his arm around Louis' shoulder and pulls him close.  
  
"Niall just shut up." Zayn says from kitchen table. Louis giggles at him because he can imagine Zayn rolling his eyes at Niall.  
  
"Zayn." Liam snaps and the sound of thump lets Louis know that Liam just hit Zayn. "Anyways let's play some FIFA." And they do and none of the boys same anything about Louis and Harry but Harry does keep a strong grip on Louis' thigh and slowly moves it up after each game.

“I’m going to go to the bathroom.” Harry announces and pushes off Louis’ thigh as he gets off the ground and drags his feet away.

“Can I ask you guys something?” Louis whispers afraid that Harry will somehow hear. “What should I get Harry for our anniversary?”

“That’s a hard one man.” Niall says and of course he’s not quiet like Louis would like him to be.

“Yeah.” Zayn says.

“I think that you should get him something personal, something that he would never expect.” Liam says and thank god someone has something to say.

“Yeah that’s smart.” Zayn says and Louis gets a big urge to roll his eyes behind his sunglasses.

“So something personal that he would never expect.” Louis says to himself as Harry walks into the room and plops back down next to Louis. He’s rich and can buy anything he wants. Louis does has one idea but he’s not sure that he’s ready for it. Whatever he’s still got a week and a half right?  
  
*  
  
Louis has been thinking. He's been thinking all day and all night and he figure out one little thing.  
  
"Hey, Harry?" Louis asks from the edge of Harry's bed. "Can I ask you something?" He whispers quietly.  
  
"Course babe." Harry sits down next to Louis.  
  
"You love me right?"  
  
"Yes why would you even question that?" Harry's voice is full of concern. Louis takes a deep breath and closes his eyes before he speaking the one thing he needs to say.  
  
"I've been thinking..." Louis starts.  
  
"And?" Harry finishes for him.  
  
"I want to see again." And he means it. He means it more than anything. He wants to go on tour with Harry and SEE the different cultures. He wants to see the world. He wants to see himself, how he looks after fourteen years. But most of all he wants to see Harry, see the man he fell in love with and hopefully the man he will grow old with. "Harry?" Louis asks after five minutes of silence.  
  
"I-I-." Harry chokes out and Louis doesn't know what to do. He's never seen Harry react that way, he's never been speechless before. Louis shakes his head. Maybe Harry doesn't want to pay for it anymore.  
  
"Harry?" Louis is on the verge of tears as he wants for Harry to speak. "Say something please. Anything just talk." Louis' voice cracks and he tries to swallow the lump down.  
  
"I don't know what to say." Harry voice is so lifeless and blank that Louis can't hold back as a few tears slip from his eyes.  
  
"Do you want me to see again?"  
  
"I-I don't know." Harry says and Louis knows that this was stupid. He shouldn't have said anything.  
  
"You were so determined to let me see on Christmas." Louis reminds Harry. "So what's different now?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"Then say something!" Louis snaps as he tears break and run down his face. He stands up and looks down at where Harry is sitting. "Say something god dammit!" Louis stomps his foot and whips the tears.  
  
"I-I don't know what to say." Harry says and Louis can't take it anymore.  
  
"You said you wanted me to see again!" Louis yells at the top of his lungs. "You said you were willing I pay because you had the money and would so anything for me because you love me!"  
  
"I am, I will." Harry voice is so different like he's lost or something.  
  
"Then what do you think? Do you want me to see?"  
  
"I-I-."

"Forget you Harry." Louis spits out as he stumbles quickly out of Harry's bedroom and out of his flat and when he gets out of the flat building he regrets leaving because he doesn't know how to get home. He stops in the middle of the sidewalk as he wipes more tears away.  
  
Louis needs to get away from here. He starts to walk forward until his feet hit the streets. He listens for any cars and he hears none so he starts to walk across.  
  
"Louis!" Harry yells and Louis turns around quickly, hope filling his body. "Louis!" Harry yells again but this time it's panicked. "Run!" Louis frowns and then he hears it, the sound of a car coming right at him. His eyes widen as he turns back around and takes one, two steps forward before he hears the piercing sound of a car screeching.  
  
Then there is a hard pain in his left hip and his feet fly off the ground. His right ankle hits the cement and Louis screams out in pain as he feels something snap. His arms fly out as his hand scrapes against the cement and his wrist bend is a horrible way that will not feel too good tomorrow. His body skids across the ground for a couple of feet. The right side of his body scraping against the hard cement, bringing up skin and leaving little holes that quickly fill up with blood and drain out of him. His head hits the ground hard but when his body bounces up slightly and he comes back down his head hits against the ground again.  
  
"Louis! Louis can you hear me?" Louis blinks up at Harry but only sees the darkness that haunts him. He feels a weird wetness surrounding his body and he knows it’s his blood. "Oh my. Someone call an abundance!" Harry screams but it sounds like a whisper to Louis. "Louis stay with me babe. Say something." Louis barely hears Harry's panicked voice as he tries to stay awake.  
  
"I-I-." Is all Louis manages to get out before he hears all the sounds around him fade and he closes his eyes as he falls unconscious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think?? :)


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UPDATE AT 4PM ON THE DOT! JUST LIKE I SAID
> 
> lol anyways i hope you all like this chapter :) not a lot more left now
> 
> Enjoy :)

Who's bed is this? So uncomfortable. Louis thinks through his foggy head. He is so lost right now and can't remember where he is. Did someone drug him? Is that why his head so foggy? No, he was with Harry right? Yes, he was with Harry. Speaking of Harry where he is. Did Harry and him get drugged? What is going on right now?  
  
His whole body feels numb and he can't move nor does he have the energy to. Louis tries to lift his finger but for some reason he doesn't know how. Louis feels like he is half asleep and he doesn't know whether he is dreaming or if he is in reality. He can hear people whispering and animals singing. Okay so obviously the talking animals are his dream but still.  
  
Okay so let's just start from the beginning.  
  
Name: Louis William Tomlinson. From: Doncaster. Born: December 24, 1991. Age: 22.  
  
Okay so the basics are down. What about now?  
  
Well the last thing he remembers is hearing Harry's voice. It was distant like they were in a...tunnel? No. Why would they be in a tunnel? Okay Louis think. He relaxes and cleans his mind, brushing away all the fog and cob webs and concentrates real hard.  
  
Then it hits him. (Bad pun sorry)  
  
Louis asked Harry to let him see again and Harry never responded so Louis tried to leave but Harry came for him and then Louis got hit by a car. Wow what a great night he had. So if he got hit by a car then that must mean he's in the hospital and if he's in the hospital then that means he's on medicine. Genius! That was so hard though and now Louis head is aching. Time to venture into the dream again.  
  
*  
  
This time when Louis wakes up he is a where of his everything. He still doesn't have the energy to move but now he's fully into reality. He hears people whispers and honestly it's annoying like he's trying to sleep right now.  
  
"I don't think that is a smart idea, sir." An unknown voice says.  
  
"What? Why?" That's defiantly Harry and by the sounds of it he's not too happy.  
  
"Sir I need you to understand that the patient must be fully healthy for the procedure to happen."  
  
"He is fully healthy!" Harry's voice is getting louder by the minute and Louis knows that his conversation isn't going to end well.  
  
"Healthy inside his body? Yes, but he was just hit by a car he so he's not healthy outside, sir." Oh they are talking about Louis.  
  
"You-"  
  
"Harry. How about you come sit down by me." Mum. Good to hear her voice again. Harry mumbles a few choice words under his break as he drags his feet to Jay.  
  
Louis should wake up now but his head is really hurting. So Louis let's sleep overtake him again.  
  
*  
  
This time Louis awakes with the full energy to move his body. He reaches to his shoulder and itches an annoying tickle.  
  
"Louis!" Harry shouts and then those strong arms are around him and those soft lips are on his. "Are you okay babe? No of course you're not you got hit by a car. How are you? Are you in pain? Do you want me to call a nurse? I think I will. Your mums here she went to get coffee I'll get her while I get the nurse. Don't move babe I'll be right back." Harry rushes quickly and pecks Louis on the lips before he runs out of the room leaving Louis speechless. He just wishes Harry would have talked that much when Louis said he wanted to see.  
  
The door to his room opens and three different voices come in. One is Harry's another his mums and last someone he doesn't know but he can guess it's the nurse Harry called for.  
  
"I brought them Lou just like I said I would." Harry talks so fast and honestly Louis is concerned.  
  
"Don't worry about him Louis he drank ten cups of coffee." Jay says. Someone is by his bed and touching weird things and making strange sounds.  
  
"How are you feeling Louis?" The nurse says from next to him.  
  
"Tired but I'll be okay." He admits and someone takes his hand in theirs, Harry.  
  
"Are you sure babe?" Harry rubs his thumb across the back of Louis' hand.  
  
"Yup." He says popping the 'p' and smiles softly to Harry before turning away because he's upset at him.  
  
"As you probably know Louis you were hit by a car yesterday afternoon and you should be very grateful with the little amount of injuries you received. Unfortunately you did break your right ankle, sprained your left wrist and got a concussion. So we put you on morphine when you first arrived here so you might be feeling drossy or dizzy a lot. Also you can't do any physical activities like working out, playing sports or even sex." Louis blushes and turns more towards the nurse knowing the both Harry and his mum are staring at him. You have a cast on your leg-."  
  
"It's black." Harry whispers and Louis is thankfully because it's the only color he truly knows.  
  
And will be on crutches for five weeks. Also will need to wear your wrist brace until your wrist is fully healed which could be in two weeks or ten weeks." Louis nods in understanding, only a little upset that he's going to be all jacked up for Harry's and his anniversary. Well with a broken ankle and sprained wrist there goes all of his options to give Harry his virginity for their anniversary.  
  
"Anything else I should know?" He asks politely.  
  
"Try not to think to hard or focus on something to long you will get headaches and that's not good for your concussion. Also you have a few bumps and bruises but you'll be fine." The nurse says and Louis nods at her again. "We are going to keep you here overnight and tomorrow you should be able to go home." A cough from Louis right makes the nurse sigh. "I'll leave you alone with your family." And she walks out the door.  
  
Louis is scared and angry. Angry that Harry never answered him and scared about the upcoming conversation with Harry.  
  
"Lou-" Harry starts but Louis holds up his good hand.  
  
"Mum can you give us a minute." Louis says as he pulls his hand out of Harry grip.  
  
"Of course honey. I'll be outside." Jay says and Louis thanks her and listens to her leave the room. The two boys sit in silence for a few minutes before Louis finally speaks up.  
  
"Why didn't you say anything when I said I wanted to see again?" He whispers.  
  
"I'm sorry." That's all Harry says.  
  
"Sorry? Are you sorry because you don't want me to see or sorry because you never answered?" Louis snaps at him and slowly pushes himself up so he's leaning against the pillow.  
  
"Louis listen. I'm sorry because I didn't know what to say, or how to say it. I want you to see I really do-"  
  
"The why didn't you answer me!?" Louis says his anger rising up inside him.  
  
"Louis." Harry sighs deeply. "I want you to see, more than anything but next week is our anniversary and," Harry grabs Louis' hand again and instead of jerking away like Louis wants to he grips Harry's hand back. "I prepared a doctor’s visit and a bunch of other shit for you."  
  
"What?" Louis frowns at him. What is Harry talking about?  
  
"I was going to give you your sight for our anniversary." Harry blurts out and Louis freezes and holds his breath. "That's why I didn't know what to say because I didn't want to ruin your gift for you."  
  
"You were going to give me my sight for our anniversary?" Louis releases his breath.  
  
"Yeah." Harry giggles and Louis just feels all his anger leave him. Harry does want him to see and better yet he scheduled an appointment and did so much to step up just for their anniversary. Harry is so perfect he deserves better than Louis. "I was nervous when you asked me and then you went on with all these questions and I tried to find an answer without giving your present away. Then you left and I knew I had to go after you and that's where you...you know."  
  
"Got it by a car." Louis smiles in Harry's direction. "So you were really going to give me my sight for our anniversary?"  
  
"Of course." Harry says and Louis listens to him as he stands up an sits down on the bed next to Louis, dipping the mattress as he pushes all his weight on it and throws his feet next to Louis' and rests their heads together and just like that all is forgiven and the two boys are back to being in love as always..  
  
"God Harry why are you so sweet to me?" Louis giggles.  
  
"Because I love you." He kisses Louis' forehead.  
  
"I love you too. Even though it's partly your fault I got hit buy a car." Louis laughs.  
  
"Hey, I tried to stop you." Harry laughs with him.  
  
"You did but now my ankle is broken." Louis giggles as he realizes that not only is Harry's gift ruined for Louis but Louis' gift is ruined for Harry. "If it makes you feel better my gift for you is ruined."  
  
"Really?" Harry chuckles and turns his face to Louis'.  
  
"Yeah." Louis smiles at him.  
  
"What was the gift?" Louis can hear the smirk in Harry's voice.  
  
"Can't tell you that now can I?" Louis jokes back.

“Yes you can. You know my gift.”

“Sorry you need to get hit by car to figure out what your gift would have been.” Louis smiles at him.   
  
"How about since none of have our gifts are available we just have a good night and not exchange anything?"  
  
"You can't give me my sight back?" Louis whispers quietly.

"No the doctor said to wait until you are fully healed." Harry says and Louis nods at him sad but for some reason thankful. "Anyways I need to ask you about tour." Harry's voice is full of so much hope and Louis really wishes he could say yes. “Are you coming?”  
  
"I can't Harry. I have to work and we both know it was a long shot for me to meet everyone you work with and be their so called friends. I'm sorry Harry." Louis says and he is sorry because now he's going to be away from his boy.  
  
"Okay. Okay." Harry breathes out. "Do you think you would come out every once and a while? You know to see the shows."  
  
"Of course." Louis says but only because Harry sounds like he's going to cry and before Louis can say anything more the door creeks open.

  
"Can I come in now?" Jay says from the door way and Harry gets off the bed, kisses Louis and leaves the room letting Jay and Louis talk for a while.  
  
*  
  
Louis is released from the hospital the next day and Jay returns back to Doncaster. Louis is surprised she stayed as long as she did considering that she left the girls home.  
  
Harry refuses to let Louis walk anywhere calming that "the crutches aren’t safe." So he has been carrying Louis from room to room and hasn't left his side and it gets kind of annoying but when Harry leaves Louis crutches around even though his sprained hand shouldn't do that. Why didn't they give him a wheelchair? Idiots those doctors are.  
  
*  
  
  
And before Louis knows it, it's their anniversary.

Louis wakes up to the smell of pancakes and syrup. He doesn't move from his bed, trying to absorb in the warmth that is left from Harry. Louis rolls onto his stomach, careful of his cast and opens his eyes, hoping to see the sunlight stream into the room but of course blackness. Sighing he rolls onto his back. A soft hum and deep footsteps come from the hallway and then enter the bedroom.  
  
"Hey babe." Harry coos as he sets the delicious smelling food into the nightstand. "Wake up sleepy." Louis fakes waking up as he rubs his eyes and smiles lazily in Harry's direction. "I made us breakfast in bed." Harry dips the bed down as he sits next to Louis. Louis pushes himself up, careful of his wrist, and towards where his bed hits the wall. He sits pretzel style and waits for Harry to join him.  
  
"Happy anniversary." Louis says and smiles at Harry who leans against the wall next to him.  
  
"Happy anniversary to you too." Harry kisses Louis quickly before pulling back and setting Louis' plate in his lap. Louis smiles down at his good smelling pancakes and syrup as he hears a camera go off.  
  
"Harry." Louis glares at him.  
  
"Pancakes and syrup with a nice cuppa." Harry chuckles as he starts to dig in Louis doing the same.  
  
The two laugh and giggle all day, not leaving Louis' flat but still managing to have a complete blast. They say I love you more times than anyone can count. They don't get changed out of their pjs, Harry in boxers, but who would want to? The dream day is staying in your pjs all day and that's a damn good one.  
  
Harry keeps taking pictures of Louis throughout the day and Louis just sighs and lets him because in the back of his mind he's hoping that one day he'll be able to see those pictures but he doesn't say that to Harry.  
  
Louis and Harry both lied about no gifts and giggle as they hand them to each other. Louis got Harry that perfect cologne that might or might not have made Louis fall for him. Harry got Louis two silk pillows for his couch and later when they are snuggled on that couch Louis let Harry have his old pillows as Louis rubs his face along the silk ones.  
  
They order in, some shitty pizza place that they both swear they will never ever buy from again. (Ironically they do, in fact, every anniversary they buy from there and eat it as they complain about how they hate it and never want it again.)

The perfect day ends with Louis curling into Harry's chest. Harry hums corny love songs and Louis savors in the vibrations Harry gives off because somehow they leave him loved. Louis drifts off but he swears that he heard Harry whisper "You'll see one day. I promise."

But will Harry keep his promise?  
  
*  
  
Harry leaves the next day.

“First will be in Latin America then Ireland and I’ll be back home in June for a quick break.” Harry whispers above Louis. Harry dragged Louis to the airport, saying that his driver will take him home, and that’s where they stand now. They are in the VIP area where no one can see Louis with his arms wrapped tightly around Harry’s middle, Harry holding him close, his shirt absorbing all of Louis’ tears. “And I’ll call you every chance I get and check up on you.” Harry sets his chin on Louis’ head. “Don’t forget that you are coming to one of our London shows so I’ll see you there too.”

 Louis holds Harry tighter not ready for him to go. Louis’ first everything is going to leave for two months. Harry and Louis never left each other’s sides for too long and now, now he’s leaving and Louis won’t be will him. He regrets it, regrets saying no to Harry, telling him that he can’t go on tour and he swears to himself that as soon as he’s out of this cast and finishes his school year he will hope on that plan and be with Harry.

“Harry.” A deep voice says from behind Harry and Louis just shakes his head and cries hard, this man is going to take Harry away. He’s going to take the only person who has ever loved him away.

“One minute.” Harry starts to rub his hand up and down Louis’ spine.

“No. You-you can’t just leave.” Louis sobs into his shirt. “I love you Harry and I’ve never loved anyone before and I’m so attached to you and-.” Another round of tears cut Louis’ off.

“Shh.” Harry coos. “I’ll be back before you know it.”

“Now Harry.” That voice says again. Harry nods against Louis’ head and pulls away from Louis, detaching them.

“I love you babe.” Harry leans down and kisses Louis. “More than anything.” Harry kisses him again and Louis melts into this one and savors in it because he won’t get another one for a while. “I’ll see you soon.” Harry places his hand on Louis’ check before kissing Louis one last time.

“I love you, goodbye Harry.” Louis wipes his tears away as Harry’s hand leaves his face.

“Goodbye love.”

“Right this way Mr. Tomlinson.” Louis allows himself to be lead over to the car and once he gets in he lets his body release another round of sobs, the driver not saying anything about it. They make it to Louis’ house and he climbs the stairs slowly and drags his feet through his door and to his bedroom where he falls face first onto the soft bed and sobs again. He falls asleep later that night with a part of him missing.


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am horrible, this is horrible, please forgive me and my shitty writing.
> 
> Only a couple chapters left now 
> 
> Enjoy this horrible chapter

Life sucks without Harry.  
  
Now that he's gone Louis drags himself around all the time with Harry in the front of his mind. Sometimes he'll sit on the couch and listens to an album but the warm body isn't behind him keeping him safe so he turns it off and goes to lay in his cold bed but that also reminds him of what he doesn't have anymore. On those nights he doesn’t get any sleep because he’s too busy crying.  
  
Everything reminds his about Harry and it's pure hell. The worst thing is the fact that Louis can smell Harry's cologne on his bed sheets and he tries so hard to wash them but he just can't. He needs that. He needs the smell, he needs the remembrance of Harry but most of all he needs Harry.  
  
Louis falls back into his old routine before he knew Harry. School, work, and sleep. Harry and him keep in touch talking on the phone everyday usually more than once if Harry gets a chance, and he makes chances because "Louis is my other half." And when Niall tells Louis that Harry said that about him he just might have cries for a couple of days.  
  
*  
  
Louis just got his cast off a week ago which means one more week until he can see Harry again. This week though is the week Louis graduates and will start job hunting for someone who wants a blind editor. Luckily he passed his classes with flying colors even the dickhead's class who told Louis to find another career. Louis can't wait to rub it in his face when he gets a good job.  
  
"How do I look?" Louis turns to his mum and holds out his arms showing off the black graduation cap and gown.  
  
"My baby boy. All grown up." She sniffs and walks over to him and hugs him, Louis hugs back. "I'm so proud of you."  
  
"Thanks mum." Louis pulls away and smiles at her.  
  
"Let me take a couple of pictures." Jay says and Louis sighs as she starts snapping away.  
  
"Mum." Louis whines.  
  
"Girls go stand next to your brother." Jay commands and Louis smiles at his sisters as they walk over and join him, wrapping their small arms around him.

“Mum I need to go.”  
  
"Sorry. Go get in line, you know where you are standing right?" Jay takes him by the arm and pulls him away, the girls dragging slowly behind them.  
  
"Yes mum." Louis groans out.  
  
"Okay, sorry it's just you never need my help anymore; maybe it's because you are all grown up." Jay’s voice cracks as she starts crying loudly.  
  
"Let's go sit down now." Lottie says and Louis takes it that he took Jay away because soon the crying is gone and Louis is alone.  
  
He makes his way to where the only students are lined up and squeezes between the two boys in his line.  
  
"Hey Louis." The one in front of him says, Louis forgets his name and honesty it's not important because he's never going to hear this guy again.  
  
"Hi." Louis says shyly and adjusts his sunglasses.  
  
"You ready."  
  
"Of course."  
  
Before anyone can say anything else the music is playing and they start walking. Louis smiles when his name is called but as he walks up the four steps and onto the stage he's only thinking about how much better this would be if Harry was here.  
  
Louis gets his diploma and his mum and sisters go out for a nice dinner. They laugh and talk and everyone is happy except for Louis who has a hole in his heart and only Harry can fill it.  
  
His family goes home that night and Louis doesn't. Instead he just sits outside his flat building, calling Harry over and over again. He knows he's in a concert but he wants to see Harry so bad and he means _see_.  
  
*  
  
The week passes and Louis and Harry are finally going to be together again but only for three days before Harry goes back on tour. Louis doesn't sleep at all the night before; he just sits in his bed and holds his phone waiting for Harry to call him.  
  
But now, now is when Harry's going to get here.  
  
Louis cleaned up his whole house, especially his bedroom because tonight Louis is giving Harry his virginity.  
  
Louis paces by the front door as he waits for ring or knock or for it to just burst open and Harry come in. He's supposed to get here at nine and Louis woke up at six get ready even though he doesn't need three hours to get ready.  
  
Louis hears footsteps outside his door and he feels his heart stop just like the rest of him. A key goes into the lock (he finally learned how to lock his door) and Louis' brain speeds up, everything going into overdrive. Harry is right outside the door. The love of his life is opening the door! When the door closes shut the two boys just stand there in silence.  
  
"Hi." That's all Harry needed to say to make Louis lose it. A smile spreads across his face, so bright that the sun is even jealous. Louis runs forward and jumps up, straight in to Harry's arm. Louis wraps his legs around Harry's thin hips and his arms around his neck, Harry places his hands on Louis' lower back holding him up.  
  
"Hi." Louis says back and then warm soft lips are on his. At first their kiss is sweet and gentle but Harry walks them so Louis' back is against the wall, removing his hands and slamming them next to Louis' head. Harry licks into his mouth and roams quickly doing everything dirty he knows making Louis moan into his mouth.  
  
Louis' body feels hot especially his lower abdomen and he needs to say it before they end up doing just small handjobs or something.  
  
"Harry." Louis pulls away and Harry does too, their breaths heavy and faces close. "Make love to me." Louis whispers and closes his eyes. Harry takes a sharp breath.  
  
"W-what?" Harry stutters out. "Are you sure? That's a huge step." Harry moves one of his hands from the wall and places it one Louis' check. Louis pushes his face into the warmth of his big hand. God he misses this.  
  
"Yes. This was going to be your anniversary gift but I got hit by a car so I couldn't do anything but Harry I love you and I want you to take away my virginity." Louis smiles shyly.  
  
"God Lou, you can't just say things like that." Harry puts their foreheads together his breath heavier than before. Harry moves closer to Louis and pushes his crotch into Louis' thigh causing Louis to blush at how hard it is. Harry starts to slowly rub his leg into Louis, making him gasp at the friction and letting his head loll to the side mouth open wide as he lets out little moans. Harry takes advantage of Louis' neck and attaches his mouth to it, sucking hard and causing more moans to slip from Louis' mouth.  
  
"H-Harry." Louis knows he's close and that's not good. "Take me Harry." He breaths out.  
  
"You're going to kill me one day." Harry mumbles as he pulls them away from the wall, placing his hands on his bum, squeezing lightly. Louis kisses Harry hotly, doing everything Harry does. The move and soon Louis' back is hitting the soft silky bed. Louis lets his hands fall to his sides as Harry crawls onto the bed and straddles Louis kissing his gently. "Are you sure you want to do this babe?" Harry asks sweetly as his fingers slips under Louis' shirt.  
  
"Yes." Louis nods his head and Harry starts to slowly lift up Louis' shirt. Louis closes his eyes terrified that Harry is going to run after he sees Louis and his ugly body.  
  
"Babe sit up." Louis pushes off the bed and allows Harry to strip him of his shirt. Louis waits for Harry to run away in disgust but instead Harry's hand is on his chest and gently pushes him back onto the bed. Another hand joins him and Harry runs his hands over Louis' chest and stomach. "Beautiful." Harry whispers and then his lips are on Louis kissing everywhere. His stomach, hips, chest, neck, face and mouth.  
  
Louis hands grip the silky sheets as Harry's fingers slowly slip under his pants. Harry waits for a protest but Louis just lies there as Harry pulls off his pants. His long fingers trail up Louis' legs and onto his boxers. Harry's hand gently cups Louis and he starts to palm him as he climbs back up and licks into Louis' mouth.  
  
"Harry. Come on." Louis whines out. Harry only chuckles as he moves away and pulls off Louis' boxers. Louis feels Harry get off the bed and the sound of a zipper. Harry climbs back onto the bed and over Louis. His dick gently siding along Louis'.  
  
Harry kisses him hotly this time, licking deeply into his mouth and all Louis can think about is how he's actually doing this. How he's actually giving himself up to Harry and he isn't scared because no matter what Harry will protect him and won't hurt him.  
  
Too caught up in his thoughts he doesn't realize Harry's hand has traveled downwards, too far actually. Before Louis can say anything one of Harry's fingers are gently pushing in his hole. Louis jumps back in panic and scrabbles up the bed until his back hits the headboard.  
  
"W-what are you d-doing?" Louis panics and reaches down to cover himself up.  
  
"Lou? Babe. I was just stretching you." Harry explains sweetly and moves up the bed placing a hand on Louis' knee rubbing his thumb. "When we um have sex I need to streams you or else it will hurt."  
  
"Why are you touching me there?" Louis whispers like what he is saying is a sin.  
  
"That's how we have sex."  
  
"That's my bum hole though." Louis looks down and rubs the sheets gently.  
  
"Lou." Harry puts his hands on Louis' face. "We don't have to do this."  
  
"No I want too."  
  
"Are you sure?" Louis nods at him. "Okay lie back down." Louis does as he says. "Bend your legs up babe." Slowly Louis does as he's told. "Okay now open them." Harry taps his knees lightly and soon Louis' legs are opened. He's never felt so...exposed before. Harry has officially seen everything and it's embarrassing but somehow comforting.  
  
"Now what?" Louis asks quietly.  
  
"I'm going to wet my finger and stretch you open." Then there it is again, Harry's finger at his hole. Louis breaths out as Harry starts to push in lightly. It feels uncomfortable so uncomfortable. Things come out of that area why is something going up this? Sex is good and Louis just hopes so because he's not feeling anything right now.  
  
Harry starts to move his finger and now it's hurting. He kisses Louis’ left thigh and then his right thigh. Louis hisses and Harry clams him by slowly stroking his cock, keeping him hard. Soon enough Harry is entering another finger causing Louis to shiver and squeeze his eyes shut.  
  
"It's okay. You're doing good babe." Harry starts to open and close his fingers. "This is called scissoring." Harry says as he opens his fingers wider and one of them hits something.  
  
"Oh." Louis says as he eyes open. Harry does it again and hits that something harder. "Oh my god." Louis breaths out. Harry takes his hand off Louis cock as he continuously scissors Louis. "Feels so good." Louis' body is starting too sweat and his abdomen is burning brightly and it's all because he has Harry's fingers up his bum but right now it doesn't seem like it's enough. "More." Louis breaths out.  
  
"You sure babe?" Louis nods his he's violently and Harry shoves in a third finger. He works faster this time, hitting Louis' spot over and over again. Louis moaning louder and louder each time.  
  
Whatever Harry is hitting feels perfect. Fantastic. God it feels so freaking good.  
  
Harry's fingers are quickly gone and Louis whines loudly. "One minute babe let me lube up." Louis doesn't question it because soon enough something slippery and hard is at his bum. This is way bigger than Harry's fingers.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm going to make love to you babe. Are you sure you want this?" Louis nods slowly. "Are you ready?" He takes a deep breath and nods. That object is soon pushing deep inside him. Louis cries out in pain every time it moves farther in. Harry is over him whispering for him to relax and breath but Louis can't because this hurts. It hurts so bad that he feels like he's going to be split in half. "Halfway there." Harry says and Louis whimpers and bits his lip because if this is sex then he doesn't want it.  
  
"This hurts." Louis whispers.  
  
"I know babe but," The object then stops moving and Louis feels Harry's thighs and balls hitting him and that's how Louis found out that object was Harry's penis. "I'm all the way in now. I need you to breathe okay. Breath and relax for me."  
  
"Okay." Louis takes a deep breath in and releases it he shifts under Harry and soon that pain doesn't hurt as much. He breaths in again and breaths out. "So this is it? This is sex? Because it does not feel too good." Louis chuckles.  
  
"No babe. But I'll show you, show you how much I love you." Harry kisses him as he moves himself out of Louis then he's pushing back in quickly hitting Louis' spot directly. Louis moans into Harry's mouth as his back arches. Harry continues to thrust in and out of Louis going faster and faster each time but somehow still being gentle. Harry kisses Louis' face all over and whispers how much he loves him.  
  
Each time Harry hits Louis' spot his moaning out loudly. Louis grips Harry's biceps tightly, digging his nails in.  
  
"Harry!" He shouts after another thrust. Louis' close and he knows it. His abdomen is burning hotter than it has ever burnt before. "I'm-" Louis doesn't even get to finish because Harry is wrapping his massive hand around Louis and pumping him in sync with his thrust.  
  
"Let it go babe. Show me how much you love me." Harry whispers hotly into his ear.  
  
"Harry!" Louis shouts and his back arches as cum shoots out of him, some landing back into his stomach.  
  
"Yes. So tight for me. Only for me-god Lou!" Harry lets it go to and there is weird feeling inside of him and Louis knows it's Harry's cum and wow does that feel good. Harry slows his thrust downs and after three more he's pulling out of Louis and falling onto the bed next to him. "That was sex." His breath is heavy as he pulls Louis into his side.  
  
"I like it." Louis chuckles out as he snuggles into Harry and ignores the weird feeling of something leaking out of his bum.  
  
"Let me clean you up." Harry scoots after from Louis and gets off the bed. Louis closes his eyes and waits for Harry's return he starts to dose off but Harry comes back and a wet rag is on his stomach and his bum. He doesn't say anything about how opened he is because he's too tired. When Harry's done he crawls back into the bed and wraps his arms around Louis and kisses his forehead. "I missed you." Louis whispers.  
  
"I missed you too. Go to sleep." Harry kisses his forehead again and Louis takes Harry's offer and drifts off into his dreams.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter SHOULD be up on Tuesday :)) 
> 
> Enjoy :) (i really like this one)

Louis wakes up in those familiar strong arms and it feels great. He's missed this way more than he thought and even though Harry's leaving to go back on tour soon he's going to make the most of him now.  
  
"Good morning love." Harry says when Louis opens his eyes.  
  
"Morning. I'm so glad you're back." Louis snuggles closer to Harry.  
  
"I'm glad I'm back too." Harry's bad breathe filling his nose.  
  
"You know that it's a familiar thing for you to wake up with stinky breath." Louis giggles.  
  
"Well did you know that it's a familiar thing for you to walk up with stinky breath too!" Harry laughs, Louis joining in.  
  
"What do you want to do today?" Louis asks after their laugh dies down.  
  
"Actually, I um I called a doctor and-."  
  
"Really?" Louis says with a smile already knowing what Harry is talking about.  
  
"Um yeah." Harry's voice is full of confusion, maybe because Louis is so happy about this and he hasn’t even officially said it.  
  
"Well when is it?" Louis asks excitedly.  
  
"In thirty minutes." Harry says and Louis is jumping out of the bed and pulling Harry with him. Ignoring the fact that they are both naked.  
  
"What are you waiting for!? Let's go!" Louis shouts happily as he grabs random clothes from his dresser and quickly puts them on.  
  
"Louis." Harry says but Louis ignores him as he slips on his shoes. "Louis." Harry grips his shoulders and turns him around. "Are you sure you want to do this?" Louis nods violently, his smile not fading a bit. "Then let's go." Louis knows that Harry is smiling as big as him, maybe even wider because Louis' going to see.  
  
*  
  
The two pull of just in time for their appointment. They don't even have time to sit down before they are being called back to the doctor. Louis squeezes Harry's hand as they are guided into a new room.  
  
"Take a seat on here Mr. Tomlinson the doctor will be in soon." Someone says, Louis' guessing it's the nurse, before leaving the room. Harry guides him over to the seat and lifts him up by the hips before setting Louis down on the squishy bench.  
  
"I'm nervous." Louis says as his smile finally leaves his face.  
  
"Don't be babe." Harry reaches over from where he is next to Louis and squeezes Louis' hand. Before Louis can say anything the door is opening and someone is walking in.  
  
"Hello. How are we all today?" He says to the boys who mumble goods. "I'm Dr. White and you must be Mr. Styles."  
  
"Harry please." Louis hears Harry's chair scrap back as he releases Louis' hand probably to shake the doctor.  
  
"And Mr. Tomlinson." The doctor says and Louis nods at him to scared to shake hands but hopefully soon he can.  
  
Dr. White does test after test on Louis and it's scary because he's never had to do this many tests. Before the doctor would just do the basics and tell him he could see. What if those doctors lied to him because they knew Louis didn't have the money but they didn't want to tell the poor boy he was a lost cause. Then he told Harry that he can see and god now they're here and Louis is going to be told that it's absolutely impossible.  
  
After he finishes all the tests Dr. White leaves to get the results leaving Louis in Harry to sit in silence.  
  
"What if he can't fix me?" Louis whispers as he turns his head towards Harry.  
  
"Don't say that Lou." Harry says sharply.  
  
"But what if-" He's cut off as the door opens and the footsteps if the doctor walks in.  
  
"Well Mr. Tomlinson I have good news and bad news. Which would you like first?" Dr. White asks and Louis opens his mouth but just looks at Harry hoping he will answer for him.  
  
"Good." Harry does.  
  
"The good news is I can do the surgery to fix your eyes but the bad news is that there is a 30% chance it will work." That's when Louis' heart drops. "And if it does you will be very lucky." That's when the tears full up because when has Louis ever been lucky. "You see whatever accident that caused this to you has destroyed your occipital lobe, which deals with your vision and it hasn't healed at all. That's why it's only 30% but it would be higher if it healed itself." That's when Louis starts crying. Harry rushes over and hugs him kissing his forehead and cheeks as he wipes away the tears that are falling.  
  
"Shh Lou breath." Harry coos.  
  
"I've never going to see Harry. I'm never going to be able to see or go on tour with you or anything else because I won't be able to see and then you'll leave me!" Louis sobs out as the door opens and closes, the doctor must have left.  
  
"Don't you dare say that. Louis William Tomlinson I love you more than anything. I will always love you more than anything in the world. I would give up my whole career and all my money to just be able to hold you or be with you for a day. I'd do anything for you because I love you. If the surgery doesn't work then it doesn't work. Nothing going to chance between us I'm still going to love you. But if you do see then I’ll love you as much as I do now because no matter what happens in the end I'll love you forever." Harry takes Louis face in his hands and kisses Louis.  
  
"You're too good for me." Louis says when they pull away.  
  
"No you're too good for me." Harry whispers as the door opens and the doctor’s footsteps enter the room. Louis wipes his face as Harry moves to sit back down.  
  
"I would like to let you know that Harry here has offered to pay for it in full and we will do the surgery tomorrow morning and by Thursday hopefully you'll be able to see." Thursday is the day before Harry leaves for tour and if this works and Louis is able to see than he'll go on tour with him.  
  
*  
  
They boys go back to Louis' flat and Harry cooks them food.  
  
"Should I call my mum?" Louis asks at the table. "I mean...Dr. White said it might not work so I wouldn't want to get her hopes up now would I? But if it does work then she'll be mad because I didn't tell her." Louis thinks aloud.  
  
"I think that you should wait because if it works then you can surprise her but if it doesn't then you can live your life without having to tell her that you tired..." Harry pulls the chair out next to Louis and sits down taking his Louis' small hands in his.  
  
"But failed." Louis finishes.  
  
"Lou-."  
  
"Don't worry Harry. I'm fine. Hopefully I'll be able to see you sooner than later." Louis says and Harry starts to massage his thumbs into Louis' hands. "It's a good chance for me to see if I actually picture you correctly." He chuckles trying to lift the mood.  
  
"I bet you do. Might be missing a few freckles for something but that's not important."

"Important to me." Louis smiles and Harry releases Louis' hands. Louis smiles fades a little before the sound of a camera goes off. "Harry." Louis frowns and does his best glare towards Harry.  
  
"What?" _Snap._  
  
"Stop." Louis whines. _Snap_.  
  
"Never." _Snap_. Harry's footsteps move around the kitchen a snap of the camera filling the room every once in a while. Louis just shakes his head at Harry and tries not to smile. "If the surgery works when you look in a mirror you are going to see how beautiful you are and then you'll look at these and see that you were always just as beautiful." Harry's footsteps move close to Louis.  
  
"Eyes and all?" Louis questions and looking where Harry and the camera goes off (what he doesn't know is that Harry got his eyes looking directly into the camera).  
  
"Eyes and all." Harry says before Louis feels his lips on his and hopefully he'll be able to see those lips soon.  
  
*  
  
Louis hasn't felt this nervous since-actually he's never felt this nervous. He's shaking, his breath is uneven, he's sweating and he hasn't even gotten out of bed yet.  
  
Harry is still sound asleep next to him, holding him close and for the first time Louis wants to be far far away from Harry. In fact he should have done this when Harry was on tour because then he wouldn't be so nervous.  
  
He's going to be that 70% that doesn't see and then he'll disappoint Harry more than he had before. When he gets out of surgery and opens his eyes to see complete darkness Harry won't even wait thirty seconds before turning around and walking out of Louis' life without a thought of coming back.  
  
Louis struggles violently to get out of Harry's arms, thrashing and flinging his body until Harry removes his arms and Louis rushes out of the bed only to get his foot caught in the blanket and fall face first onto the floor.  
  
"Louis!" Harry panics and rushes out of bed and over to Louis. Louis groans as he rolls over, Harry placing his hands on Louis' shoulders. "Are you okay?"  
  
"Yeah." Louis lies and he pushes Harry's hands away and gets off the ground. "I'm going to take a shower." Louis says as he walks past Harry and into the bathroom turning the shower on and quickly striping before hopping in, ignoring the fact that Harry is watching him from the doorway.  
  
"Louis. Are you mad at me?" Harry asks after about ten minutes into Louis' shower. Louis listens to him put the toilet seat down and sit on it.  
  
"No Harry."  
  
"Are you-."  
  
"I would like to shower in peace." Louis snaps and yeah it's rude and yeah it's not like him but one can't judge because he's under a lot of stress right now.  
  
"Yeah um sorry Louis um well we need to be at the doctors in an hour so...yeah." That's all Harry says before he walks out of the room. Louis sighs because he can hear the hurt in Harry's voice and all because Louis is a shit person.  
  
*  
  
There's so much tension between the two boys as they drive to the doctor’s office. They sit there with no music on in compete silence. Louis tries to think of the different ways to say sorry to Harry but nothing works. How to does he tell Harry that he's sorry for being mean because he thinks that the surgery isn't going to work and Harry's going to leave? Doesn't matter because if attitude of his keeps him up he'll lose Harry anyway.  
  
They walk into the office with the tension still following them and Harry takes Louis' hands in his anyways. Louis only smiles a little but saviors the feeling because he might never get to feel it again.  
  
"Are you ready Mr. Tomlinson?" Dr. White says just as the two boys enter the office.  
  
"I-i-I um." Louis stutters out not knowing what to say.  
  
"It's okay to be nervous. Say your goodbyes to Mr. Styles because you'll be in surgery for a while." Dr. White says and Louis nods as he drops Harry's hands and towards to him.  
  
"I love you." Louis whispers.  
  
"I love you too and no matter what happens I'll still love you." Harry says before he leans down to kiss Louis.  
  
Their last kiss. Louis thinks and it breaks his heart.  
  
They pull apart and Harry touches Louis' hand one last time before Dr. White guides Louis away and Louis just wants to hold Harry's hand a little longer but he can't.  
  
This isn't going to work. Louis thinks as the Doctor explains everything that is going to happen to him, the procedure. He's never going see no matter how much he wants to.  
  
*  
  
When Louis wakes up his head hurts and his eyes ache. He doesn't dare open them knowing that blackness is all he's going to see.  
  
"Mr. Tomlinson I see you're awake." Dr. White says. "We've had some difficulties and obstacles throughout the surgery and I'm honestly not sure what's going to happen."  
  
"What?" Louis asks, his throat hurts too and maybe his whole body is already starting to suffer the loss of Harry.  
  
"I know I told you that you had a 30% chance but now, after the surgery, I'm going to say that there is a 15% or lower that it worked." Dr. White says and Louis feels like crying he wants to see so freaking bad and yeah he came in here knowing it wasn't going to work, but a part of him hoped that it would work. Now he's going to lose Harry and become the same stupid blind loser he's always been.  
  
"Okay." Louis breathes out as sadness floods his body.  
  
"Go back to sleep Mr. Tomlinson and next time you wake up we'll find out what happened." Dr. White says as he filled with something bag like next to Louis' head. Louis is suddenly tried and he lets himself fall into a dreamless sleep.  
  
*  
  
This time Louis wakes up he keeps his eyes close as he guided to another room and sat down in a chair.  
  
"Louis." Harry says and comes to sit across from Louis. "How are you babe?" Harry asks as he takes Louis' hands in his.  
  
"Tired. My head hurts." Louis smiles shyly. He expected Harry to be gone by now but once they remove these bandages he'll be gone and Louis will be alone forever so why not embed the last feeling of Harry.   
  
"The pain will go away sooner than you think just take some ibuprofen for a couple of weeks." Dr. White says. "Anyways are you ready Louis?" No.  
  
"Yes." He lies.  
  
"Alright. Mr. Styles please turn the lights off." Louis listens to Harry quickly getting up and scurrying over to the switch and flicking the lights off. "Alright Mr. Tomlinson please stand up." Louis nods as he does.  
  
"I love you." Louis blurts out. "I just want you to know that."  
  
"I do know that babe. I love you too." Harry says and he has moved to across for Louis' not even two feet away, this way he'll see the dull same eyes he always has and Louis will see the blackness he always has. The worst part is Louis won’t even get the chance to say goodbye because Harry will be gone before Louis can even open his mouth.  
  
"Okay Mr. Tomlinson keep your eyes closed as I take off the bandages." The doctor’s cold finders touch his face and slowly peels back the soft cover from his left eye then the right.  
  
"Can I open them?" Louis asks quietly not ready for the disappointment.  
  
"Yes Louis. Open your eyes." Dr. White says and he does.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you like it!!
> 
> Only a couple chapters left, also sorry for any mistakes I edited this while I was watching dexter (good show i just started). 
> 
> Enjoy :)

Black.  
  
Black is all he sees.  
  
Black, but somehow it's different then before it's...blacker.  
  
Louis hearts drop just as he does, falling quickly onto his knees. He hears yelling or maybe it's talking but whatever that sound is it's muffled like Louis' ears are full of cotton. He opens his mouth and screams at the top of his lungs, shutting the shitty holes that ruined his whole life and throwing his arms back in anger. He might be screaming he might not be and he wouldn't know because he can't hear.  
  
But he can feel. Soft rough hands are on his shoulders shaking him and somehow, it's soothing to him so he focuses on it. He closes his mouth as he slowly brings his arms down. Then his hearing is coming back, someone is yelling for him but whom. Focus. He does but nothing happens it's still muffled. More focus.  
  
"Louis!" He tumbles back onto his bum as all his senses come rushing back. "Babe. You're okay." Harry. Oh he's going to miss him. "Open your eyes babe."  
  
Louis shakes his head at him. "I did and I saw black, I saw darkness." Louis whispers and Harry gently touches his hand.  
  
"Come on." Harry pulls and easily yanks Louis onto his feet. "The lights are off. Louis the room is pitch black you need to give your eyes time to adjust." Harry grabs his shoulders and steps closer about a foot away, not even.  
  
"Listen to him Mr. Tomlinson. If I started with the bright lights then it would have a bad effect on your eyes." Dr. White, almost forgot he was here, almost. If this doesn't work and Harry leaves Louis is blaming Dr. White even though it's originally Louis' fault.  
  
"Open your eyes." Harry whisper so lovely, so sweet and no one, especially Louis, can resist that. Louis takes a deep breath before opening his eyes again. His eyes slowly flutter open.  
  
Black.  
  
"Wait for them to adjust." Dr. White says from Louis' right.  
  
Nothing, just black.  
  
"Blink for me babe." Harry says and Louis sighs but he slowly blinks a couple of times and- no way that's an outline of something. Louis blinks again and again and again. His eyes are brightening and that's not just something that's Harry. Those are the curls that everyone loves so much. He blinks faster this time trying to see if this is real and he's not imagining it.  
  
He's not. Harry is coming more in more into view. He's see the whole outline of him now and he just prays that this is real and he's not imagining it.  
  
"What do you see babe?" Harry says.  
  
"You. I see an outline of you." Louis smiles bigger than ever before.  
  
"I'm going to turn on this mini lamp to give this room a little light." Dr. White says and Louis hears his footsteps and soon there is a mini glow from the corner.  
  
He can see.

“I can see. Harry I can see.” He says as his face lights up with a smile.  
  
The light barely hits the left side of Harry's face but it's enough for Louis to see...well see. The light hits just below Harry's eye until the middle of his throat. He takes a step closer to Harry, leaving almost no space between them, and places his tiny hand on that defined jaw in front of him. He has to turn his head up to actually see Harry's face completely and he's never remembered him to be so tall.  
  
"Another mini light." Dr. White has so much happiness in his voice as he runs around to the other side of the room and flicks on the second light. This one illuminates Harry's right side and it's just as beautiful as the left. Louis places his other hand on Harry's jaw and runs his fingers along it. He might have touches his millions of times before but now he can see it.  
  
"Now I'm going to turn on the big light. Louis close your eyes." Dr. White says and Louis does so. He misses his sight already. The light goes on and Louis' eyelids turn from black to a weird orange. Like the beginning of a sunset.  
  
"Open." Harry whispers. Louis does and he's blinded (bad pun sorry) by the bright light. Once his eyes adjust to it after many blinks he sees green. A beautiful, beautiful green. He stares at it a little longer at it until he realizes that those are the famous green eyes of Harry Styles and he's seeing them. He's _seeing_ them.  
  
His eyes scan over the rest of Harry's face. His eyes go straight to the big smile and cute dimples. He reaches out and pokes on for good measure. Then his jaw line which not only feels lovely but it looks lovely. Louis looks at every freckles, hair and color on Harry's face.  
  
His eyes travel to his hair and wow, the dark brown hair is pushed upwards but the sides are still curly and Louis William Tomlinson is seeing the one and only Harry Styles. He feels like a fanboy all over again.  
  
Louis takes a couple steps away from Harry as he looks him up and down. Louis' imagination didn't do Harry justice. Harry is perfect in every way. He's pale but a good kind of pale. His white T-shirt fits perfectly so it shows off the tattoos on Harry's chest, detailed ink swallows. The sleeves grip his biceps and they are even bigger than Louis thought. He can see half of a ship tattoo as well as the others scattered across his arms. His looks down and if those are the tightest jeans ever but Harry looks good in them. They show the long thin legs that go on forever. Last his is boats. Brown and wore down, he's going to need to buy another pair soon.  
  
"You're hot." Louis giggles. "I'm a lucky man." Louis walks back towards Harry and throws his arms around his neck. "Thank you. For letting me see again."  
  
"Anything for my love." Harry says back his big smiles not even close to fading.  
  
"Dr. White." Louis turns his head and looks over at him. A young doctor very handsome with light blond hair and dark brown eyes. "Thank you."  
  
"You are very welcome Mr. Tomlinson. I'll give you two sometime to yourselfs." He winks at Louis as he walks out the door.  
  
"So." Louis starts.  
  
"I brought a picture of you from when you were young." Harry pulls away from Louis, who drops his arms, and digs into your back pocket. "I asked you mum to send it to me a couple of days ago. I want you to see how you looked than and how you look now." His voice is nervous and so is his face and honestly it's cute as ever.  
  
Harry leads Louis over to a mirror that he did even see. When they step in front of it Louis breaths gently as he takes himself in. His short and it might be because he's standing next to Harry but his torso and legs are short too. His thighs are thick, a lot thicker than Harry's. His face is older and when he looks at the picture Harry is holding up he looks old. Fourteen years though and he still has a feminine appeal to him. His eyes are blue and not dull, no longer dull and hopefully they are never dull again. He has tiny freckles scattered across his face and his teeth are bright white and a tiny bit crooked. His hair is golden tan and swooped across his forehead.  
  
"Gorgeous." Harry whispers into his ear. "Absolutely gorgeous." Louis doesn’t think that but he’s not going to ruin the fact that he can see just because he’s insecure about himself.

"Thank you." Louis says as he turns to him. "Thank you so much." Tears fill up and fall out of his eyes, causing his sight to become blurry. "I love you. Thank you Harry. Thank you for everything." Louis hugs Harry and buries his face into his chest as Harry wraps his arms around Louis. "How can I repay you?"  
  
"Come on tour with me." Harry says and Louis pulls away and looks up at Harry through blurry eyes. Louis doesn't even hesitate as he answers.  
  
"Okay."  
  
*  
  
Louis and Harry are driving to Louis' house right now to show Louis' new sight and for him to say goodbye before they go on tour. They, Louis' going on tour.  
  
They pull into the driveway and Louis pretty much jumps out of the car as soon as it stops and runs into his house.  
  
"Mum!" He bursts through the front door.  
  
"In the kitchen honey." Louis runs to the kitchen and flings open the door, his sisters and mum sitting at the table eating. He runs towards his mum and hugs her.  
  
"Oh Louis." He pulls back and looks directly in her eyes with a huge smile. Her eyes widen as she takes in Louis. "Oh my god!" She yells as she stands up and hugs Louis as starts jumps around. "How? How!"

"Harry." He says just as Harry walks through the door. She let's go of Louis and runs over to Harry tackling him into a hug.  
  
"Hi Jay." He chuckles as he hugs we back.  
  
"Hi?! Thank you Harry!" She's crying now as she hugs Harry, who looks terrified for some reason.  
  
"Jay can I talk to you in the other room for a second." Harry says as he looks directly at Louis.  
  
"Yes. Of course." Jay says as she rushes Harry out of the room.  
  
"So you can see again." Lottie says and Louis looks at her and wow she's a lot older than he remembered. Then he looks at his other sisters he's never seen any of them before, them not being born when he became blind. They look just like his mum, each and every one of them.  
  
"Yeah." Louis breaths out with a smile. "Harry asked me to go on tour with him so I won't be able to see you guys for a while."  
  
"Well be fine as long as you are." Lottie says and Louis smiles at her. He holds his arms out as the girls get out of their chairs and hug him. Louis hears a loud squeal from Jay in the other room but he doesn’t question it.  
  
"Okay girls let go of Louis. Him and Harry need to go pack because they're leaving tomorrow." Jay says as she walks back into the room with a huge smile of her face, showing each and every one of her teeth. Louis smiles back at her and when the girls let go he hugs her and whispers his goodbyes.  
  
"We'll keep in touch." Harry says as he takes Louis' hand and pulls him out the door but not before Louis caught a glimpse of Jay winking at him.  
  
*  
  
Today is the day. Louis' going on tour. Yesterday was eventful. He got his sight back, told his family and quit his job. Now he's going to be happily with Harry on tour. Yeah its going to be fun once Louis tries to fit in and make some friends and that’s going to be very difficult because Louis has never had friends before.  
  
They are standing in front of Louis' flat waiting for the car to come get them. Louis is looking everywhere, trying to take in the sights before him.  
  
"We are going to the airport and flying directly to Sweden the boys are already waiting for us." Harry says as he takes Louis' hands in his.  
  
The car then pulls up and they are taken to the airport where they get on a private jet.

“I’ve never been on a plane before.” Louis says once they sit down.

“Really?” Harry says and Louis nods at him. “I’ll keep you safe if you get scared.”

“I’m not scared I’m just…interested.” Louis says as they start to lift off. He looks over at Harry and lays his head on the taller man’s shoulder. “I’m going to take a nap.” He says. Louis sleeps the whole time over to Sweden.   
  
*  
  
He wakes up in a curtain covered bed. It's uncomfortable and his neck hurts. He climbs out of it and jumps onto the ground. He's on a tour bus, or that’s what he can guess from everything he read about them, there are about six little bed thingy’s.  He walks towards the front if the bus, past the mini kitchen/living room and to the driver. He hasn't talked to anyone new since he's been able to see but now he's going to have to talk to this older man that is playing some game on his phone.

“H-hi.” Louis stutters out as he plays with his fingers. The man jumps back at Louis’ voice and Louis looks down at his fingers as he sees the man look him over. He may not be blind anymore but he isn’t comfortable about his boy.

“Louis?” The driver says and Louis nods his head, not looking at the man. “Harry told me to give this too you when you woke up.” He reaches under his chair and feels around before pulling out a book and handing to it Louis. He takes the book into his small hands as nods at the driver as he walks back toward the couch in the living room.

He opens it and it’s not just a book it’s a phone album, all of him. He flips through the pages. The picture of him and Harry when he first met Nick, Harry was wearing sunglasses just likes his. When they went to the mall and Louis tried to eat in piece. Him and in the kitchen two days ago. His eyes when he was blind, so dull so boring but if he looks close enough he can see a sparkle of something in them. More pictures, mostly just him but of the ones where it’s him and Harry if he has his sunglasses on then Harry has sunglasses on. Even in the dark, Harry wore sunglasses for him. This boy is going to kill him one day. His favorite picture is the one where Harry and him are spooning, both fast asleep but he doesn’t question how he got the picture because he just loves it. On the last page is a picture of him when he first met Harry at the concert, how did he get any of these pictures. Louis doesn’t even remember half of them.

“Do you like it?” Harry walks into the room and sits next to Louis; he’s sweating and breathing heavy. His shirt is stuck to his body in sweat and god that’s super-hot.

“I love it.” Louis smiles at him and kisses Harry. “How was the concert?”

“Bloody fantastic, you’re coming to the next one.”

“Okay then.” Louis doesn’t even question it anymore. He has so many opportunities now that he’s not blind and he’s going to make the most of it. “Did you wear sunglasses every time I did?” Louis asks quietly.

“Yeah, I didn’t want you to be alone.” Harry says sweetly.

“Thank you.” Louis smiles at him. “For everything.” He admits. Everything though is more like saying, thank you for saving me from my boring life, thank you for helping me gain some confidence, thank you for being my boyfriend.

“Anything for the love of my life.” Harry clears his throat before talking again. “We are going to be in Pairs next week. Do you want to spend a romantic day with me?” He looks nervous and is staring at a duffle bag on the ground rather that at Louis. Maybe something is in it…no probably nothing.

“I’d love too.”

 


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last Chapter! The epilogue is all that's left now and I'm going to miss this fic so much. I'll talk about my upcoming works when i post the epilogue :) 
> 
> This is short but thats only because there's nothing left for me :"(
> 
> Epilogue should be up on the weekend.
> 
> Enjoy :)

"That concert was fucking sick man!" Zayn yells as he stumbles onto the bus, Niall and Liam not far behind. They are all sweaty, gross, and breathing heavy yet they're laughing and full of happiness. "Harry why'd you leave so-oh Louis!" Zayn yells as he launches his sweaty body onto Louis.  
  
"Louis?" Niall says and he turns around from where he was talking to Liam to see Harry sitting beside Louis, who is covered by Zayn, on the couch. "Louis!" Niall and Liam say together as they run towards Louis and tackle him.  
  
"Missed you man!" Liam says from the top of the pile.  
  
"Missed you more!" Niall shouts loudly into his left ear.  
  
"No I missed you more!" Zayn giggles into his right ear.  
  
"Let's be honest here I think I misses my boyfriend the most." Harry chuckles.  
  
"Shut up Harry. You guys had your reunion and now it's our turn." Liam glares at Harry.  
  
"Can't breathe!" Louis says from under all of them. They scurry off quickly, pushing and shoving each other. Niall sits down directly beside Louis and Liam by Harry leaving Zayn to sit on Niall's lap. "So how was your concert?" Louis starts to make conversation.  
  
"Fucking great as always." Niall says and Louis looks over at him. "Zayn-holy shit! Louis you can- can you fuck you can see!" He shouts and the other boys join in. The jump off the couch and dance around screaming, yelling happy thinks. Zayn starts singing I see the light from that tangled movie. Liam joins in as Niall grabs his guitar, that came from god knows where, and starts to play the tune. Louis laughs as Harry grabs his hand and pulls him from the couch. They dance around the boys in the extremely cramped tour bus.  
  
Not only did the boys have an excellent reaction but if this is what all days are going to be like on tour then Louis going to have a blast.  
  
*  
  
"There's a lot of people in there Lou and they're going to try to talk to you but you don't need to talk back just say you're Louis and they will leave you alone." Harry says once the other boys leave the bus and go into the stadium.  
  
"Okay." Louis says. Buts it's not okay because he's going to be able to see all the judging eyes people are going to give him when he stutters out his name in embarrassment. Harry's sweet but he probably told them that Louis is a little pussy that he gave eyes too so say away from him.  
  
Harry takes his hand and walks them into the building. Harry waves to the big bulky security guys as they walk down the long highway. Louis keeps his eyes at his feet as they move, too afraid to look at the people that are staring strangely at him.  
  
"Harry. Walk your arse faster! I need to get that grease pit that you call your hair done!" Some girl yells from the end of the hallway. Louis doesn't dare look up anymore; instead he just walks faster as Harry pulls him along.  
  
They make it to the door and are immediately surrounded by noise. Yelling, laughing, talking etc. Harry is yanked away from Louis who looks up in panic to see Harry being pushed into a chair and a girl with gorgeous hair and a slim body. Can Louis look like her?  
  
People are running around the room, throwing clothes and Liam is throwing food at Niall and Zayn who are getting dressed. Someone bumps painfully into Louis' shoulder and causes him to fall down in the doorway.  
  
"Watch where you're going. What are you doing back here anyway? Are you some crazy fan? Security!" He yells at Louis who tries to hold back the tears that have filled up in his eyes.  
  
"Hey!" Harry shouts, his voice full of so much anger, he pushes himself out of the chair and towards Louis and the man. "Watch your fucking mouth Jake." He steps into Jake's personal space and buffs out his chest, trying to seem harmful but to Louis he looks like a little puppy. "That's my boyfriend you're talking too and if I hear you say one more thing to him then I'll punch your fucking face in. Go back to doing your fucking lights and leave Louis alone." Harry spits out as Jake nods his head violently as he walks past Louis. "You okay babe?" Harry leans down and picks Louis up.  
  
"Yeah I'm fine." Louis doesn't need to look around to know everyone's eyes are on us because the room is silent beside them. They turn to face the room and yeah everyone's eyes were on them.  
  
"Everyone this is Louis." Harry announces and Louis does a small wave at them as they mumble hi. “Be nice to him and if you’re not then you are going to regret.” Harry says sharply to the room. "Come on babe." He takes Louis' hand and pulls him back towards the chair and pushes Louis into it. "Let's make him sexier Lou." Harry says to the very thin lady with the pretty hair. Louis blushes as she starts to work on his hair, everyone else in the room being loud and annoying as before. Harry walked to a different side of the room but even though Louis can't see him he still manages to pick out Harry's voice and he always will.  
  
*

Days go on and before Louis knows it he is making friends with Harry’s crew. Harry isn’t always by his side and these people will just come over to Louis and how they heard so many great things about him and how Harry never shuts his mouth. They are also very sweet and ask him if he’s happy or he needs anything and one person in particular asked him what it was like when he was blind and surprisingly, Louis told him.

“It’s different than now, I mean obviously because I can see now. There is just so much paranoia about if someone is in the same room as you or if they are judging you from afar, I mean look at me,” Louis gestures down at himself. “I’m not exactly good looking but other people not have a problem with it. Being blind is like the unknown, you don’t know who or what’s near you but you can feel its presence.  Everyone judges you too, they think you can’t act on your own or become what you want to be. My teacher at uni told me to find another carrier because a blind person is not going to find a job as an editor. I was actually offered four interviews so I’m proving him wrong. Overall though being blind is annoying to a point but I’d do it all over again if it meant I’d be where I am today.” Louis finishes and looks over at the bulky man, Jim one of the security guards.

“Wow.” He says.

“Yup. If you ever what to feel what it’s like you could put a blindfold on for a while, it’s not nearly the same but in some way it is.”

“I think I am. I’m going to go call my wife and tell her to buy us a blindfold. Thanks Louis.” Jim pats Louis’ back and walks away.

“I’m really proud of you.” Harry says from behind him causing Louis to jump and turn around quickly.

“For?” Louis giggles as he takes Harry’s hands in his, swinging them between them.

“Making friends.” He smiles shyly at Louis.

“Oh, thanks Harry. I think it’s because I can see all their faces and if they really care about what I’m saying, I couldn’t do that before.”

“Everyone cares about you.” Harry whispers.

“I think that those screaming girls right outside care about you more than me.” Louis smiles at him, showing all his teeth.

“True but you never know Lou, once they see you they’ll think the same thing I did when I first saw you.” Harry leans is closer to Louis.

“And what was that?” Louis breaths out.

“That’s a nice arse.” Harry says with a seriously face but laughs once Louis pushes him away and frown at him with his arms crossed. “What?” He asks when he sees Louis’ straight face. “You asked.” Harry says causing Louis huffs and turn around towards the other end of the hallway. He starts walking down it only for Harry to come right up and slap his arse.

“Don’t know why I love you?” Louis says but takes Harry’s hand anyways.

“Because we are soul mates.” Harry whispers and kisses Louis’ head causing him to blush.

And yeah they are soul mates.

*  
  
The concert is amazing so far. Now that Louis can see he can see all the funny things the boys do and their interactions. Louis has front row seats where he is screaming the whole time and smiled brightly every time Harry comes over and winks at him. The concert is almost over and everyone but Harry has taken a seat on the stairs behind them.  
  
"How is everyone tonight?!" He yells into the mic and receives millions of yells back from the crowd, including Louis. "I've been keeping a secret from you lovely people." Harry goes from cocky popstar to a nervous wreck as he stutters out the next line. "I'm in love." The coward goes into awe, some angry yells but all in all it's good because Harry's looks at Louis with those green eyes and smiles gently at him.  
  
The next line Harry says though makes Louis' heart stop.  
  
"In fact, he's here." He says into the mic as the crowd falls into pure silence. Harry looks around worriedly at the crowd and then back at the boys who nod him on.  
  
"Does he want to come on stage?" Liam says into his mic for where he is sitting next to Niall. Harry looks at Louis hopefully but Louis is just standing there in shock. Harry just came out of the closet and the boys obviously knew about this. Shit. Does he go on stage? That might've too much for him.  
  
"Babe?" Harry says forward not looking at Louis in case he doesn't want too and Louis respects that. "Do you guys want to meet him?" The crowd breaks it silence as it yells out. Louis turns around to see the happy faces of the girls, all screaming in happiness.  
  
"This is fucking great! I knew Harry was gay!" A girl yells from a feet few away from Louis making the girls she's talking to join in. Louis thinks quickly, these girls are happy and want to meet him or see him more like it. He's not going to have to talk to them personally but they are going to judge him. Louis looks over at Harry who glances quickly at Louis and he has so much love and hope in his eyes. Louis turns to the boys and they all nods encouraging at him.  
  
He's going to do this.  
  
Louis catches Harry's eyes and smiles at him and nods violently. He's going to do his. Harry has changed Louis but in the best way possible because Louis would have never done this without Harry. Maybe it's the adrenalin though.  
  
Harry walks over to where Louis is standing next to the stage and hopes down into the tiny space between the crowd and the stage. He grips under Louis' armpits and drags him over the top of the bar and then pushes him onto stage. Louis stands there and looks at the crowd, regretting his decision. How could he think he was ready for this? Just this morning he had trouble standing in the same room as Harry and his crew. Louis turns his head at the ground and puts his hands in front of him, playing with his fingers.  
  
"I got you babe! You're fine!" Harry yells into his ear over all the screaming girls. Louis nods at him but doesn't feel any better until Harry wraps an arm around his waist and pulls him towards the middle of the stage where they stand until the crowd gets quiet. "This is Louis and well he's the best thing that ever happened to me." Harry looks at Louis as he says it but Louis just continues to stare at the ground. The crowd roars loudly and Louis' ears are starting to hurt badly. "Thank you but don't forget that I love you all too!" Harry turns them around and walks back stage as the boys finish up their speeches. "I'm so proud of you." Harry whispers once they can no longer hear the crowd.  
  
"Thanks." Louis says finally looking up. "Are you sure you're okay with that?"  
  
"Course I talked to management, the boys, Simon, pretty much everyone before doing it." Harry takes Louis' hands in his. "I love you babe."  
  
"I love you too." Louis pecks Harry softly. "But I better get a nice twenty security guards now that I'm famous." Louis says sharply before seeing the looks of horror on Harry's face and bursts out into laughs. "Got you there."

"Yeah you did." Harry smiles down at him. "Are you ready for Paris?" Harry asks with the same nervousness when he asked him before.  
  
"Yeah." Louis says and bites his lip excited to see why Harry is so nervous every time Paris comes up.


	24. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ITS OVER! I'm going to miss this fic so fucking much. Last night when I was writing part of the epilogue I read my other fic's epilogue (which is the same length, chapter wise, of this fic) and I cried my eyes out because I'm a bitch and made you guys read that. So I made this much more happier than my other one. I hope that I got everything and closed up all the lose ends if I didn't just ask me and I'll tell you what would have happened. I want to thank every single one of you who read this, gave me kudos, commnets, etc. I know that it wasn't the best of fics but its my second baby and I love it. 
> 
> For the future I do have a couple of oneshots in mind, in fact I have already started on some. My lovely friend told me to make one about a pregnant blind Louis, combining my fics, so that will be out soon. Also I have other ideas that I plan to do. If you have any ideas or anything you want me to write you can just tell me :) (check end notes if you want to tell me something, it has all my accs) After I finish my oneshots I'm starting another fic and I love this one because its A LOT different then the ones I have wrote.
> 
> Last but not least, thank you guys. I love you all. 
> 
> Enjoy :')

Louis wakes up at 5am on June 22nd because he's so ready for the day that he can’t even wait anylonger. Excited. Happy. Nervous. Sacred. Anxious. All because today is his and Harry's day and Harry won't shut up about it. He's actually has the other boys making digs at it, especially Zayn who winks at Louis every time Paris or anything that start with 'p' pops up.  
  
Him and the boys have been here, in Paris, since the 20th but due to the concerts they had the last two days Harry had to put his and Louis' big romantic day on hold until, well, today.  
  
Louis eyes flutter open and when he sees the light from the sun he smiles at it because it's his friend and he never will complain if it's too bright.  
  
Fourteen years of darkness teaches a couple things.  
  
Louis gets out of bed and travels to the tiny kitchen in Harry's and his hotel room. He starts to make tea, knowing he's not good back to bed, when Harry comes stumbling into the kitchen shirtless with only his boxers. Louis blushes when he sees him.  
  
"What are you doing up?" Harry says with a panicked look in his eyes.  
  
"I couldn't sleep." Louis shrugs.  
  
"No. Go back to bed. You'll run everything." Harry states as he moves around Louis and starts to push his back until Louis walks and finds himself back the their room. "Stay." Harry points at him and closes their door. Louis sighs and sits on their bed as he waits for Harry.  
  
It's not a long wait at all, actually more like ten minutes, and Harry is flinging the door open and grabbing Louis' hand, pulling him back into the kitchen and pushing him into a car. A short stack of chocolate pancakes and a nice cuppa is placed in front of him.  
  
"Enjoy." Harry kisses Louis check as he digs into his own plate.  
  
Louis does enjoy. Harry and him play footsies under the table as they giggle and feed each other food, making a sticky messy that they leave for the maid to clean up.  
  
*  
  
Harry and Louis are walking down the streets of Paris, hand in hand and it's perfect because they can do it now that the world knows about them. Yeah it's not like the movies when they play the French music, not at all; actually, it's better than that. Why does one need French music in Paris when the fact that they are in _Paris_ is enough.  
  
Louis' smile doesn't fade at all throughout their day.  
  
Harry and him go to a beautiful restaurant for lunch, sitting outside so they can enjoy the fresh air and love that is Paris offers. Harry goes to pick up a fork that he claimed he dropped under table even though Louis sees it on the table. So when Harry sinks to his knee Louis doesn't question it but just as Harry opens his mouth to talk a waitress spills a jug of water at the table beside them, gaining Louis' attention. Harry sighs as he gets off the ground with a sour expression for a few minutes, Louis notes that he still hasn't got the fork from under the table.  
  
Things go back to normal after that Harry is lovely and happy like Louis is. The only thing that is different is that Harry's hands are sweaty and they are _never_ sweaty. Yeah it’s pretty hot out but the breeze that’s blowing keeps them cool so Louis wonders what's up with him but he doesn't let it bother him.  
  
*  
  
The two lovers walk to the beautiful Luxembourg Gardens and sit and different places admiring the flowers, trees, fountains, families, kids, the sky, the palace but most of all each other.  
  
"I could get used to this." Louis says when they sit down at a bench under a beautiful tree next to some flowers that Harry insists on picking and giving to Louis claiming that they are gorgeous but not as gorgeous as Louis himself, Louis rolls his eyes at him but blushes anyways.  
  
"Of what?" Harry asks and looks over at Louis who giggles as Harry squints his eyes once the blinding sunlight hits them.  
  
"Everything. I could get used to seeing. Seeing this, seeing that. Seeing you." Louis breaths out the last sentence. "I could get used to Pairs, it's beautiful here and the people are so nice, the foods great and it's what they call it."  
  
"And what's that?" Louis watches as Harry swallows a big lump and wipes the sweat from his forehead that seems to be getting wrose.  
  
"The city of love." Louis whispers. Harry clears his throat and gets off the bench and sits on his heels on the ground where he curls a finger around a flower because plucking it out of the ground and slipping it behind Louis' ear.  
  
"Gorgeous." Harry smiles and Louis blushes back. There is a moment of silence when Louis glances away quickly to spy on the little woodland creatures visiting the tree they're sitting under. He stands up and cranes his neck to watch the squirrel climb higher up the tree until Louis can’t see anymore and when he looks back at Harry he's surprised to see him on his right knee looking up at Louis with a nervous expression.  
  
"Squirrels are cute." Louis states thinking that Harry is making fun of him some how.  
  
"Not as cute as you." Harry's voice cracks and Louis gives him a worried look.  
  
"You okay?" Louis asks. "We should go all the pollen might be getting to you."   
  
"Yeah. Yeah I'm fine." Harry huffs out as he stands up and wipes his jeans off. They start to walk away, Louis still going on about squirrels and that he wishes he could have seen them even when he was blind and Harry giggling at him. "I'll buy you one." And Louis' face lights up brighter than the sun.  
  
*  
  
They swing their arms between them as Harry leads them to their next destination. Louis is pointing at everything he sees and says how perfect it is and how perfect Paris is. Harry agrees each time and Louis glances at him to see that not only is Harry's hands sweaty his armpits are sweaty too but Louis doesn't say anything because he knows better.  
  
"Here we are." Harry says and they stop. It's a wall. Louis thinks. A wall of perfection more like it. "It's called Wall of “I Love You's”." Harry whispers in his ear. "It says I love you in 250 languages, maybe more." Harry says and Louis just blinks at the wall. The white words and red shapes pop out against the dark blue tile. "It was made as the location for lovers." Harry's voice is sweet like honey in Louis' ear. The two walk forward and look closer at the wall. "The red is to show the broken hearts." Louis nods as if he already knew that. "Look." Harry says excitedly. Louis follows his pointing finger and sees the I love you in English. Louis smiles at it and walks to stand next to it.  
  
"Take a picture of me." Louis giggles out and turns around, back facing the wall, as he looks at Harry who is kneeling on the ground?  
  
"Don't say anything." He says and Louis looks at him closely. "I honestly can't even believe we are here right now." He chuckles. "I remember when I first met you and I saw myself with you and I was already in love. Then it happened, we feel for each other. I feel for you, eyes and all and I will always love your eyes and all. What I'm trying to say is that I love you Louis. I love our stinky breath in the morning. I love the way we just giggle about it as if it never happened, even though it's an everyday thing, and kiss it away. I love how when you get shy or nervous or anything you, have and still do, twist your fingers and its adorable. I love how every day I fall harder and harder for you. I'm still falling and will never stop falling. Louis I want you to know that I'm going to fall more and more in love with you but I'd like the chance to fall in love more and more with you." Harry coughs as he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a little black box. Louis' hands fly up to cup his mouth, stopping it from yelling out in happiness as he figures out what is going on, _Harry is proposing_. "So Louis would you like to give me that chance? Will you marry me?"  
  
Louis nearly dies right there.  
  
Harry opens the box revealing a beautiful sliver band with various diamond sizes scattered across it making it sparking in the Paris sunlight.  
  
Louis loses all self-control and moves his hands as he lets out a loud noise that's he never heard before. He jumps up and down before he looks down at the ring and flings himself at the taller boy, wrapping his arms around him and kissing him deeply.  Harry barely stops them from going down onto the cement as he grips Louis' shirt tightly and kisses him back. Harry puts Louis on his bent knee and holds the box up in his big palm.  
  
"So is that a yes?" Harry asks.  
  
"Obviously!" Harry kisses him again before pulling back and taking the ring out of the box. Louis bouncing anxiously on his leg as he holds out his left hand that's soon to be covered in a diamond ring and then later a gold band. And Harry slips it on him and Louis nearly faints.

Their night ends with them cuddled on the first floor of that Eiffel Tower enjoying a nice dinner. Louis glances down at his hand as Harry and him admire Paris lit up at night and even at night the ring shines and as long as that ring shines Harry and Louis' love will shine with it.  
  
*

Ten years later

"Happy anniversary babe!" Harry shouts as he bursts through his and Louis' bedroom door. Louis squints his eyes open and looks at Harry and the tray of pancakes he's carrying.  
  
Harry's still as sexy as ever to Louis. His hair still curly but cut short after they adopted their two kids, Conner and Ashley who are 2 year old twins now. Harry's body is built even more than when Louis first met him, his arms strong and bigger than ever, ads defined and well for 30 he's pretty damn good looking. He was bigger in the last couple of years of one direction who broke up 2 years ago, the boys made a mutual decision to end the band after everyone was married and starting a family. Also once they quit Louis found a perfect editors job that he loves dearly and makes a good amount of money, not that they need any.  
  
"Happy anniversary." Louis smiles as he sits up and makes room for Harry and the tray. Harry pecks Louis' cheek as he sets the tray on the bed and sits next to Louis. "Where are the kids?" Louis asks as he grabs a fork and starts to eat and it tastes the same as always, Harry hadn't lost his touch.  
  
"My mum came and got them early this morning. She said she'll bring them back tomorrow." Harry says with a mouthful of pancakes.  
  
"So just us?"

"Yup." Harry winks at him.  
  
The two men spend their anniversary as they always do. The giggle and laugh while Harry takes pictures of everything they do and Louis hides away from the camera. He's 32 and his wrinkles are starting to grow in, he worried too much when he was blind, didn't smile enough and now it’s taking effect. Louis is still the short boy with the thick thighs and juicy butt that Louis hates but Harry loves.  
  
They order from the same shitty pizza place that they always do calming that maybe it tastes better this year, it doesn't, and then they just complain how horrible it is. Harry sings Louis the song he sang him on their wedding night, the one Ed told him about. Louis didn't tell anyone about the song Harry wrote for him because it's special and only him and Harry should here it because every time Harry sings it Louis cries for an hour or too.

Everyday Louis thanks Harry for everything that he has done for him, especially by giving him his sight back and opening him to a new world he would have never visited if he was blind. Overall Harry is the best damn thing that’s happened to him and late at night when the kids are sleeping Harry shows Louis how much Louis means to him.   
  
They end there anniversary with Harry slowly making love to Louis and afterwards cuddling up in bed. The moonlight slips into the room and Louis looks down at his left hand which is being held by Harry's, who is fast asleep, their gold rings embed with the others name on the inside. Then Louis looks at the sliver diamond ring and smiles because it's shining just like Harry’s and his love.  
  
The ring is still shining even when Louis and Harry are long gone from this world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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**Author's Note:**

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